Jadien: you may or may not have picked up on this yet
but I'm not the most confident, brave...
"WOAH! HEY! LOOK AT ME! I'M THE TOTALLY BEST!" Kind of person.
I'm shy, and nervous, and self-conscious, and uh...
PSSSHH mess
There's a lot of bigger, important things that I worry about...
But I'm just gonna talk about the stupid ones that will probably make you think I'm just...
dumb
Gotta keep it upbeat and entertaining!
I can't be creating swirling vortexes of existential crisis and self-doubt (lolz)
Yet
Judge me if you want, but I mean
I can't help but be pointlessly freaked out about these things
I'm sure you've got your weird triggers too!
Loud flushing toilets
...where I haven't been scared of loud flushing toilets.
It's just the fact that...
especially if you're in a stall...
you're locked in this tiny space with this solitary isolated toilet bowl, and it's always a gamble.
Some toilets are really nice and quiet, and they just go...
*Frrrrrssssshhhhh....*
It's the freaking biggest relief of my day...
...when I think a toilet's gonna pull some ungodly sound outta nowhere...
...but it turns out to be practically silent.
I get overwhelmingly happy!
Probably too much to be considered...
Normal anymore...
But then there's the ones you flush... and all of a sudden...
You've just released Satan himself!
and the thousand tortured souls from the fiery pits of Hell!
Just......
*Slam*
*Windows Startup Sound*
I go into mental breakdown stage!
I can't-- I can't even move!
Have you ever seen the videos of like goats or some other animal, where they just freeze and fumble over if they get startled?
...That's me.
But I d--I don't fall down.
If I'm in a house where there's a bunch of extra room in the bathroom, I get as far away from it as possible.
Immediately.
But again...
...if I'm in a stall, I have to end up just pressing myself against the door as much as I can and wait for it to end.
"Jaiden, ya bimbo, if you're so terrified, why don't you just leave the stall?"
*Pfft*
Uhh, well, good sir, have you ever noticed that bathroom stalls tend to mainly open INWARDS?
That means in order to leave, you gotta step CLOSER to the toilet.
Uhmm......
no, thank you.
That's the OPPOSITE of what I want.
I'd rather just be a frozen victim for 10 seconds!
What factories even make loud flushing toilets anymore?
Just make them all quiet!
Please?
I'm getting tired of pressing that dumb button, and all of a sudden, all the Jurassic Park movie start screeching at me at the same time!
*Terrifying dinosaur sounds*
I'm slowly falling into insanity...
Speaking of bathrooms...
You know those public hand dryer things?
The ones where you have to stick your hands in and it blasts air?
I- I can't do those!
I have this image in my head, where I put my hands in...
and then some cyborg future handcuffs lock onto my wrists...
...and I get kidnapped by a hand dryer.
Like an evil bathroom transformer waiting for its next human victim...!
Well too bad, you dumb hand dryer! You can't fool me!
*Shakes water off of hands*
And speaking of hands...
I'm just on a roll with these transitions today!
I'm self-conscious of them.
No--I'm not just afraid of hands in general,
That's Chirophobia.
I had to look that up!
I have this dumb thing where my hands are always cold...
Not just like, "Oh your hands are a bit cold!"
They're FRIGID!
It's so bad that I'm actually very nervous about shaking people's hands or giving high-fives...
...just because they're so cold.
Whenever you meet someone new, you normally shake their hand...
But I don't wanna shake their hand if their first impression of me is gonna be:
"Hi, I'm Jaiden!"
BOOM! I'm secretly an ice witch, and you've just been cursed with the power of a million ice cubes!
How about instead of shaking hands...
we just do... finger guns!
I like that idea much better!
Like, we've all been in that situation where you have to say "bye" to someone, and it's like...
"Well, shoot... am I supposed to shake their hand... or hug them... or whatever other confusing goodbye motion..."
Just do finger guns! Less confusion!
And contact!
I'm sure the mysophobes (or Haphephobes) can agree with me on that one.
And with high-fives...
Normally it's not that bad, but I still try to minimize it to the least amount of physical contact as I can.
Someone goes, "High-five!"
And I just smack their hand as fast as possible.
It's weird and noticeable sometimes...
but trust me, I'm doing you a favor.
What else can I be stressed about?
Time limits in video games!
The less amount of time, the worse it is!
I just can't stand the feeling of a constant...
"You'd better hurry up and complete your mission... you only have a limited amount of thinking time..."
"...every action you do that has no impact on furthering your path is a mistake..."
"You're doing everything wrong, and your inevitable punishment is steadily approaching! "
Even in Mario!
I mean, it doesn't affect me too much...
Because the timer is up in the corner and not in your face like some games...
...and there's typically a lot of time.
But as soon as that music gets faster...
Oh boy, everything just got intense!
Better hurry up, Jaiden.
"Ohh I'm in trouble now, time to sprint!
No time to look for secrets or nothing...
...I'm about to have an aneurysm here!"
Our lives are a time limit when you think about it...
Back when I was a kid, I had this Gameboy Advance SpongeBob game...
And for the 2nd level, you had to get SpongeBob to the top of Sandy's tree house by hopping up branch platforms...
But the thing was, there were bird baths scattered around...
...and you only had a limited amount of time to get to the next bath before SpongeBob dried out.
I was so scared of running out of time...
I never got past the level!
I stood at the bottom, just sitting in the bath, occasionally stepping out, only to get extremely panicked to see the time start ticking down and hop back in!
I really wanna play that game again.
I've gotten better at video games since then, and I kinda wanna experience the other 95% of that game...
...And I bought the game. *Laugh*
I bought the game again because I wanted to play the level and prove to you...
That I can beat it!
So yeah, I'm just gonna...
I have my Gameboy... and I'm gonna play the level.
Look at this nostalgia though!
I haven't played this in...how many years?
At least 10.
Oh my god. *Chuckle*
What am I doing?
This is one of those games where it didn't even save your progress...
you had to enter a password!
Oh my god, the pressure is on actually.
Look at this... it only gives you 20 seconds! What the heck? That's... pressure at the max.
All right. Oh it's SpongeBob.
And then you get like the spatulas, people are gonna say, get the—
Hey it's Ari!
Thanks Ari.
Should I become a gaming channel? This is totally gaming channel status.
Oh, no! just kidding :(
And...alright. See?
Dang...
"Hot and Cold"
I don't know what my problem is here,
I've just never liked it.
If you don't know what I'm talking about, "Hot and Cold" is a game where you try to find something based on audio hints other players give you
"Cold" means you're farther away,
"Hot" means you're getting closer.
So basically, you're walking around aimlessly, while other people are screaming at you.
That's how my mind interprets it anyway.
I can't cope with the constant input from people based on my every action...
And it gets worse when I'm getting closer!
With every step, people are getting more and more intense at me...
And I feel like something's just gonna pop up outta nowhere and...
...uhm...
Stab me?
"You're getting warmer..."
"You're hot"
"You're steaming..."
"You're on fire..."
"You're in a VOLCANO!"
"You're—"
"STOP!! You're freaking me out!"
I can't handle all this intensity!
I just wanna run away, back to the cold area!
It's calm over there.
It's chill. *Air Horn*
Last one I'll talk about here...
Before YouTube, and even since I was a kid,
I've always been self-conscious about my voice.
But for different reasons.
When I was young, somehow I started believing
"Wow, my voice is really low compare to other girls."
"People are gonna think I'm a boy."
...That one didn't make too much sense.
I don't know how I came to that conclusion.
I don't believe in that one anymore.
But recently, it's been more of
"My voice is weird and awkward and mumbly, and I don't like it."
I'm really reserved, so I think since I never did much talking, my voice wasn't able to develop as much and get as strong as it could be.
It's funny, when I first started making videos, when I had to sit down and record...
...which back then, only took like 15 minutes
Which I'm like, pfft, I wish it only took 15 minutes to record audio now.
But even after those recording sessions...
My throat would hurt and end up being really sore, because I wasn't used to talking that much for that long.
It was kinda pathetic.
But now, it literally takes 6 hours to get my audio done,
So I've come a long way.
I've been swinging back and forth between being self-conscious and just being okay with my voice...
...because I still think it's a bit too mumbly and weird.
But I've been reading some comments, like
"Oh, Jaiden, I really like your voice!"
Which I mean, thank you!
But I...I don't really see it.
But if...if you enjoy it, then I'm glad!
My vocal cords, say "thank you".
Thank you.
There's a bunch of other things that I wanted to talk about that I didn't get to mention,
Like phone calls,
I can't really handle phone calls.
This day and age, people seem to only call if they need something or along that line,
And I just think, "What do they need? What are they gonna ask me? What if I don't have an answer? What if I waste their time?"
"I don't know what they want from me, the possibilities are endless!"
"OH MY GOD!!"
And then I end up...not picking up the phone.
(Chuckle)
...and just freak myself out.
Also, eating food in front of the people
I know that one is a bit more common.
But I'm really like
self-aware about that too.
I feel like someone's gonna judge me on what I order and how I eat it and other nonsense that practically no one does.
Yeah, I don't know.
Maybe I'm a freak for being nervous about so many things, maybe I'm not,
I don't really know anymore
Talk to you later, bye!
...I'm doing finger guns.