So, have you ever worked really hard actually gotten what you want that goal that you put
out there, you achieved it.
And you're happy for a little while and then, the happiness starts to fade and you start
to feel maybe a little bit hollow inside like, gosh, I thought that graduating with that
degree, getting into that institute, buying my first home, buying that fancy car was going
to make me happy, but it didn't it just starts to go away.
Guys, in today's video, I'm going to give you six steps to live a more fulfilling life.
So, to start this video off, let's talk about the difference between being fulfilled and
being happy.
They're not the same thing.
So, there's this study they take a population of individuals break them into two sides.
One side they say, okay, go be happy, do what you want to do, go eat what you want to eat,
go see what you want to see, go watch movies, go enjoy yourself.
Be happy in the moment.
The next group they say, go do something that's going to require a bit of work, but it's going
to leave you fulfilled.
So, they go off and they volunteer, they go off and they mentor.
So, what's interesting is the level of happiness initially with this group over here was very
high, but it fades very quickly.
The group over here, their level of happiness was much lower, but then it kept growing up.
In fact, over the period of a year, it continue to look better as they look back.
The other people they ask in a year, you know, what did you think of your happiness level,
they didn't even remember what they ate.
The point being is that go for fulfillment, happiness is a byproduct of fulfillment.
And if you're out there just chasing happiness, you're going after the wrong thing.
Step number one to living a fulfilled life is to make sure that your security and your
safety are taken care of.
I know this sounds obvious, but if this stuff is not taken care of, you're not going to
be able to take steps to the other parts of living a fulfilled life.
Instead, you're going to be worried about where am I going to get food, where am I going
to sleep tonight, how am I going to pay the rent.
I know for me when I started my business, one of the best things we decided to do was
to stay living in our small town.
Our expenses were incredibly low.
And it was something, hey, I can get great food, I have a pretty good quality of life,
my mortgage is relatively low, I don't have any car payments and to this day I haven't
bought a new car.
I made sure that I had my safety and security in there.
I remember talking to my wife and it's like worse case, we can go live with my mom, but
if you're in a situation because you're starting a company and you're in San Francisco and
you're paying sky high rent and you're wondering, oh, my gosh how am I going to do this, that
may not be the best environment for you.
Or, if you're living at home and you got people around you who are you just don't feel safe
talking to them about your ideas because they're going to put you down they're going to yell
at you they're going to say, why don't you get go get a real job, then maybe you need
to remove yourself in that situation.
So, find a safe and secure base and that's where all of this starts off of.
Step number two to living a more fulfilled life is to work on your mental strength.
So, much like going to the gym, you can strengthen everything up here because you've got one
side that's saying, you know, you can do it and the other side saying, no, you can't.
If you go in and you keep feeding the doubts, you feed the fears, they are going to get
stronger.
Instead, pat yourself on the back and say, hey, I manage to graduate high school or maybe
you've got your GED.
I managed to make my way through college or maybe you just got through the first semester.
I started that first company, yeah, maybe I failed, but I started.
Most people will never even try.
Guys, pat yourself on the back.
You have accomplished a lot of things and work on that mental strength, continue to
feed this side and you're going to get better and better.
Step number three to living a more fulfilled life, gentlemen is to focus in on the human
connection.
They talk to people on their death beds, what do they say they regret?
Not staying in touch with my son, not staying in touch with my friends, not building deeper
relationships with people.
You want to focus in on that.
Use that piece of advice because these relationships they make they make up such an important part
of our lives.
There was fascinating study done on Chicago subway.
They divided the group into two different groups and what they found is that people
that they put in solitude, rode the subway by themselves versus the people they put on
another subway who have the chance and they encourage them to talk with random people
they didn't know.
What they found is that people that spoke with people that engage with them had a much
higher level of happiness after they got off the subway and throughout their day versus
the people that went through in solitude, their level of happiness was not changed at
all, in fact, they were in some cases it went down.
We are creatures that are we're social beings, we want to engage with others.
What I highly recommend though is step away from social media.
It is not social.
You want to take the time to get on the phone, call people up, take what have one person
a day maybe five days a week that you call up that's in your list and you simply talk
with them.
If it's family, you let them know that you love them that you care about them.
How about you take the further step?
I know we did this with our family for the last six months.
We went out of our way to see people.
I had people tell me, hey, you know, I'm kind of two or three hours out of your way, can
you swing by and see me?
Of course, I can.
Go out of your way for other people.
It is going to make your life much more fulfilled.
Step number four to live a more fulfilled life, gentlemen is to always be growing, always
be learning.
The way I look at this, you've got to be sharpening your sword every single day you need to be
investing in yourself whether it's your body, whether it's your mind.
So, my friend, Ryan, I am staying here with him in Denver, Colorado, what I really noticed
about Ryan is that every morning he gets up at 6:00 AM and he reads for almost an hour.
He's got tons of books and he sits there and he just goes through them.
He also has a lot of books on his Kindle and this guy is just constantly consuming information.
He does this before his day gets busy.
But this is the time that he reinvests in himself.
So, when was the last time you invested in your own education?
Books are great, but maybe you wanted to take a course.
You can take it a local junior college.
There are tons of online courses, that's one of the reasons I put out courses for men style,
but there are other ways you could learn how to become a better writer, learn how to become
a singer, go out and country dance.
You know there are so many different things that you could be doing to become sharp to
become better to become the man you know yourself to be.
Step number five to living a more fulfilled life is to work on your confidence.
I know a lot of you guys ask me about this, so like, Antonio I don't have any confidence.
That's not true.
Switch out the word confidence and let's look at the word competent.
Where in your life are you actually pretty good at something?
Maybe it's just you know a lot of about Star Wars, okay, that's a start.
Maybe you know a whole lot about lighting, I don't know about wood paneling, about installing
sinks, whatever it may be that is a place to start because somebody somewhere needs
this information.
Somebody could actually learn from you and you are ahead of many in that area because
you've put in the time, you've put in the study, you've put in the effort.
Now, you may not be able to hear him, he's going to be in the background just a bit,
but Ryan is actually upstairs doing music lessons.
So, I'm going to use this as an example because a year ago, he knew nothing about singing.
Now, he's going through practicing his voice and everything.
He's got a goal to actually sing at the Grizzly Rose here in Denver.
Ryan, I know you're going to do it.
You're going to be awesome.
But, right now he's not at that point.
But, here's what's interesting about confidence is it builds up and when you put in the time
you put in the work you put in the effort, all of a sudden you build off that and it
keeps going higher and higher.
So, if you have almost no confidence, well, you have a starting point and all you can
go is one direction.
Now, let's go in to step number six to building and living a fulfilled life.
Guys, it's about taking everything we just talked about and giving it to somebody else.
Mentoring, working with others, it's not about you.
You've got to drop the ego, you've got to drop the me, me, me mentality.
Honestly, that's kids, guys.
And if you don't take this leap, you're going to have that empty feeling that I talked about
at the very beginning because let's say your goal is to create and to buy a beautiful house.
Well, why do you want to have that house?
Well, for me, I know that I want to be the patriarch to my family.
I want to give my family not just my immediate family, but my entire family a home that they
can go to, they can vacation at.
If something happens, my brother loses his place, he can come live with us and not feel
that he's imposing on us.
My sister can come visit with her kids and not feel that she's getting in a way and feel
free to stay for two months if she wants.
I mean, yeah, she's a pretty cool sister.
The point being is you to reach this highest level of fulfillment; you've got to give it
away.
All right, gentlemen now it's your turn.
I want to hear from you down in the comments below what you think of this video, what did
you learn, what action are you going to take to improve your mental growth, your mental
strength to actually go out there and improve relationships.
Remember, just watching these videos isn't enough.
I want you to take action and the first step is simply leaving a comment on what you're
going to do.
Now, if you want more, I want you to go check out the support article.
Katrina, she's over at Communication for Nerds.
She wrote the article, she did the research, she's got some pretty cool charts.
I'm going to link to it down in the description.
Gentlemen, my final note surround yourself with amazing people.
I don't know, but can you hear Ryan up there?
The guy is singing trying to get better.
I love surrounding myself with people that inspire me and it doesn't matter, you know,
when it comes to video and YouTube and style, it's not that narrow.
I tried to surround myself with people who are doing things that I don't know anything
about because that's how you grow, that's how you become better, that's how you become
the man you know yourself to be.
Gentlemen, take care.
I'll see you in the next video.
Bye-bye.
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