*idle chatter between the studios*
*banging gavel x3*
[Madhouse]: Okay. People, we've hit a crisis.
*DING*
[Madhouse]: Anime sales have been going down, and I think we can all agree...
[Madhouse]: We're running out of original ideas for anime.
But, if we all put our minds to it, I'm sure we can come up with somethi-
[Sunrise]: OOOH! OO-OOOH-OOOH! Ooh! OooOoooOoh!
[Madhouse]: *Sighs* What is it, Sunrise?
[Sunrise]: What if we make a new Gundam?
[Madhouse]: Oh, for god sake's we've been over this, Sunrise. You can't use Gundam to solve everything!
[Sunrise]: What about.... giant robots?
[Madhouse]: Or giant robots.
[Sunrise]: What if... we made a show about a machine...
A big machine! That looked like humans, but humans can actually pilot it!
[Madhouse]: That's still just giant robot-- ohh-okay, you know what?
No more giant robots, are we clear on that everyone?
No more giant robots!
[Sunrise]: Giant robot dragons!
[Madhouse]: Does ANYONE ELSE have any different ideas?
[A1 Pictures]: I don't see what the problem is.
[A1]: I mean, if we just keep making SHOWS, somethin's gonna be good EVENTuallly. Amirite, people??
*opening suitcase noise*
[A1]: Here! Is anyone short on shows? I got plenty to spare!
[A1]: Here's one for you, and another for you--
[Ghibli]: I think you all suck and everything you do is trash!
[A1]: Awww, don't be like that, Ghibli! Here! Have a show!
[Ghibli]: I don't want your goddamn show! You think this waifu otaku piece of SHIT is worth calling ANIME?!
[Madhouse]: Come on, Ghibli. Don't be an asshole. Not everything we've made is bad--
[Ghibli]: HEY! At least I don't take 8 years to finish a goddamn movie!
[Madhouse]: Alright, now you're just being a dick.
*Ghibli's haughty chuckle and sucking in air*
[Ghibli]: I'm sorry... how many Oscars have you all won?
[Bones]: How about you keep on sucking Miyazaki's retired dick, Ghibli?
[Ghibli]: How about you come back to me when you've made a critically acclaimed film?
[Bones]: DO YOU WANNA FIGHT, OLD MAN?! LET ME SHOW YOU HOW TO ANIMATE A FIGHT!!
[Ghibli]: FUCK YOU ALL! I QUIT!
*sliding door closes*
*stomping feet*
*SLAM*
[A1(I think?)]: Should someone go get him?
[Madhouse]: He'll be back.
Probably.
[KyoAni]: Come on, everyone! Let's not fight.
There's nothing in life that can't be achieved from sunshine and happiness.
*innocently creepy giggling*
[Madhouse]: If only we all could have your outlook on life, KyoAni. What's your secret?
[KyoAni]: Well... uhh.... If I'm having trouble thinking of something...
I guess having cute girls never hurts!
[Madhouse]: Cute girls? You mean like P.A Works?
[P.A Works]: I'm sorry, did someone just say my name?
God, I look so fucking good today. Like my work, of course.
[I.G]: Psst, remember that show I helped you with ages ago? How about we do a continuation of that?
[Gainax]: HUUUUUH?????!
[I.G]: The wacky one that got really popular on Adult Swim?
[Gainax]: HUUUUUUUUH??????!
[I.G]: Bwah, Fooly Cooly! HOW do you not remember Fooly Cooly??!
*awkward silence*
[Gainax]: HUUUUUUUH??????????????????????!
[I.G]: Ah, screw it I'll do it myself...
[Gainax]: Y'know, back in my day we didn't need to worry too much about what we were doing.
All we needed was some... cool-looking stuff and.... giant robots.
[Sunrise]: GIANT ROBOTS!
[Gainax]: And everything would just work out!
[A1]: Is that also how they taught you how to do endings, old man?
*Everyone bursts into laughter*
[Madhouse]: No, but seriously.
[Shaft]: I see. I see shapes. I see... I see colors! Everywhere!
[Madhouse]: Uhhhhhhhhh..... what.
[(???)]: He's having one of his visions again...
[Shaft]: What if... we had GIRLS! Except they didn't have necks! And they could TILT THEM!
And they just kept TILTING?
WE NEED TILTING NECKS!!
[Madhouse]: How in the hell is this supposed to make us sell anime?
[Shaft]: You'd be surprised! I'll call a guy. He can make this all happen.
[(???)]: Does his name by any chance rhyme with Makiyuki Minbou?
*dial tone beeeeep*
[Shaft]: NO!!
[Diomedia]: Guys, guys! Instead of arguing about concept, how about we start going back to the basics for now?
[Madhouse]: That's... actually an excellent idea!
...who the hell are you??
[Diomedia]: I'm Diomedia! Y'know... Diomedia?
[Madhouse]: Uhhhhhhhhhhhhh....
[Diomedia]: I made Princess Jellyfish! Bokurano! KANTAI COLLECTION!! Come on, you guys must've heard of me.
*extremely awkward silence fills the room*
[Madhouse]: Oh...kay... well, I'm just gonna bring it over to you, ufotable.
[ufotable]: Oh! Uh, well I think that-- *phone buzzes*
[ufotable]: Sorry, I... I gotta take this. It-It's just the wife.
Hi, honey. How are you?
[Type-Moon]: Who the FUCK is Namco-Bandai?!
[ufotable]: Wh-whoa, w-wait, what??
[Type-Moon]: Here I am, taking CARE OF THE KIDS... and ALL I hear is that you've knocked up some other bitch you're with!
[Type-Moon]: Who the FUCK is Tales of Zestria?!?!
[ufotable]: Honey, can we talk about this later? I'm--
Kinda in the middle of something.
[Type-Moon]: Oh, no! You BETTER not hang up, you SON OF A--
[ufotable]: *hangs up* Heh. Uh... I'm, sorry what were we talking about again?
[Trigger]: ehHYYY, GUYS! WHAT'S HAPPENIN' OVER HERE?? WE HAVIN' A PARTY?!
[Gainax]: Where the hell have you been?!
[Trigger]: Me and Mappa have just been CHILLIN' and havin' fun!
Somethin' you old folks j'st wouldn't understand!
[Mappa]: He literally dragged me along. I didn't do anything.
[Trigger]: Eyyyyy, MAPPA! We cool, RIGHT?! You had fun, didn'tcha?
[Mappa]: Please, don't touch me.
[Madhouse]: Wasn't Wit with you guys, too?
[Trigger]: Oh, he got stressed about working on Attack on Titan season 2 and passed out at the bar!
*Guren no Yumiya playing in the background* [Wit drunk slurring]: It's comin'! I promise, ith's comin' sexhiser this time!
[Wit]: Nanunahnuhehjeager... *hic*
*plates breaking as Wit passes out*
[Gainax]: Have you been drinking again?!
[Trigger]: FUCK YOU, DAD! YOU DON'T CONTROL ME!
[Gainax]: HEY, you show some respect for your elders! I taught you everything you know!
[Trigger]: OH, PLEASE! Like you could produce anything good nowadays!
In fact, all you old farts are getting past your prime! It's time for us young ones take over this industry!
[Gainax]: Everything any of you have-- *Everyone yells over each other*
*arguing gets even louder and louder*
[Madhouse]: Hey, GUYS! GUYS!! GUYS!!!! *still loud arguing but ends*
[Madhouse]: Alright, so we're left with two options we can all agree on.
Either we make an abstract, over the top, action show with cute girls and giant robots based on Type-Moon..... *overlapping conversations from all the other studios*
*still overlapping conversations*
[Madhouse]: OR... Plan B. *overlapping muttering with Sunrise approving of robots*
[Madhouse]: Boobies.
[Sunrise]: BOOBIES!
[Bones]: FUCK YEAH! THAT'S THE ONE! THAT'S THE ONE RIGHT FUCKING THERE! *everyone in overlapping agreement of tits*
*still overlapping unanimous agreement*
[Madhouse]: Alright! I'll inform the Americans.
[Madhouse]: Hey! Crunchyroll! Funimation! We've got a new show for you!
[Crunchyroll]: Thank you very much! *phone beep*
[Funimation]: Are we getting a new anime?
[CR]: Yes, but you can have this one, dear.
[Funimation]: Aww, thanks darling! I love you!
[CR]: No-no-no-no-no! I LOVE you more!
[Funi]: Noooo, I love YOU more!
[CR]: N-n-n-n-n-n-no! I love YOU more! [Funi]: No-no-no-no-no! I l~ove Y~OU MORE! <3
[Daisuki as voiced by Gigguk]: Oh, get a room already!!
[CR]: Get lost, Daisuki!
*classical violin orchestra music*
Hey, guys! Hope you enjoyed that video.
Thank you so, so much to Yusa from OtakuVs for doing the visual for this video.
I came to him a few months ago with a script since I had no idea how I was gonna do it.
I asked him if he could bring it to life, and I think he did an absolutely fantastic job.
So I highly recommend checking out some of his work
I'm also going to leave a link to the character models he did in the description along with his twitter.
And if you like this skit, consider supporting me on patreon! But until then... I have been Gigguk, and I'll see you all next time.