We just found out that NBC announced
that you're both coming back next season to Saturday Night
Live.
Yeah.
[APPLAUSE]
We-- It's great because we also found out about it
by seeing it in a headline.
We got no calls.
It's just people in interviews like, you're back.
And we're like, oh, good to know.
Thanks.
Wait, your agents-- or no one told you?
No.
I don't have an agent.
[LAUGHTER]
No, my cousin does all my bookings.
That can--
A really nice guy.
That can explain it.
And he charges what?
60%, right?
60%, the industry standard.
That's yeah-- that seems fair.
Wait, that's crazy that nobody called to--
or what if you didn't want to go back?
Great question.
See, this is what a great agent would do.
Well, you know what?
Maybe I should be your agent.
Yeah.
So the two of you have great chemistry.
And did you know that?
Is that why you did this together?
Or did you already have this chemistry,
or did it develop from being there?
We knew each other.
At stand ups we knew each other.
And then we worked together as writers.
And it seemed like--
I mean, it wasn't really our choice.
But we were excited about it because we--
again, we have no choices in life.
No choices.
The application said one of each.
[LAUGHTER]
And that's how it happened.
So do both of you read the news all day long
to figure out what you're going to say,
or is that somebody else is doing this?
Oh, no, no, no, somebody else is calling.
He reads all the news.
Do you really?
Yeah, I mostly read the news, yeah.
I mean, now it's hard not-- it's a little addictive.
When we're working, it's hard.
When we're off, like in the summer,
it was so nice for a full month to just try to not listen
[INAUDIBLE]
But when things happen during the summer,
are you sad that you're not there to make jokes about it
and talk about it?
No.
You don't care?
Who's ever been on a beach thinking,
oh, I wish I were in the office.
I wish I was working.
I know.
Now, the two of you are close, but what is
the relationship with Scarlett?
Is that affected your friendship?
Are you like the third wheel on dates and stuff?
He's going to cry.
[LAUGHTER]
Actually not any more because I'm dating a celebrity, too.
Are you?
She is a times square Elmo.
[LAUGHTER]
You think it's she?
Yeah, well, I was surprised.
That comes off, you don't know until it comes off.
Yeah, he has changed a lot since I feel like-- you've changed.
You don't invite me places.
And when you do, you ditch me.
Yeah.
Yeah, at times.
Thank you.
That's what I said.
I sent him a text with that.
[INAUDIBLE]
You've never invited me anywhere.
You don't invite me come over, hang out, have dinner.
Well, yeah, because if you're with like Scarlett Johansson,
I don't want to tell you to come this dive bar with me
and watch a Yankee game.
I feel like maybe you have better things to do.
What if you had a girlfriend that you could--
do you have a girlfriend?
No.
All right.
[LAUGHTER]
He's like an [INAUDIBLE].
No.
What if I-- who do you like?
Because I'm good at arranging things.
And we have a big platform here.
Let me know who you like.
This is very [INAUDIBLE].
Really?
Yeah.
What?
Like in the audience or something?
No.
[APPLAUSE]
Yeah.
This is too much pressure.
Yeah, that would be immediate.
If you need someone immediately, yes, in the audience.
But if you would like to just name like a celebrity crush--
Oh, I don't know.
I mean, I don't want to say anything.
Well, is Beyonce single?
No.
[LAUGHTER]
You don't read the news.
She's not--
[LAUGHTER]
Well, I don't know.
How's Hilary doing?
Is she--
She's doing great.
Yeah.
She's happier than she's ever been.
Oh, this is too much pressure.
I don't know what to say.
Just there must be somebody that you really like,
and I can set you up.
Well, Roseanne went to Israel.
[LAUGHTER]
Before [INAUDIBLE] Israel was perfect.
You don't want to do long distance.
That's your problem.
That's my problem.
My taste is too problematic.
All right.
This has become an intervention.
[LAUGHTER]
Talk about-- let's talk about the Emmys.
So you're hosting.
This is-- and it's more fun to do it together.
It's not as fun when you're alone on stage if things,
especially if things aren't going well.
But the two of you-- what do you have planned?
Are you going to dance?
Are you going to sing?
Mm-mm.
We've eliminated those two things.
All right.
No, we'll probably.
I mean, we're going to--
you know how it is to host those award shows.
It's about like kind of just keeping everybody entertained.
But the real job, or the real pressure is for the nominees.
That's what the show is for.
So we're just trying to keep it moving.
It's really not up to us.
Yeah, I understand.
If that makes sense.
But you have to like--
I mean, you've already written everything
that you're doing for--
no.
Sure.
We've got some loose ideas.
[LAUGHTER]