Does your family have a plan of where they're going as a group and how they're
going to get there? A family vision is a picture that a family holds on to that
helps them know why they would want to make changes as a family. And that's
different than a family mission statement. A family mission statement is
the statement that they say that explains to them how they are going to
accomplish that family vision. This video is going to talk about how our family
created a family mission statement that really worked. And I'll go into detail
about the 6 steps that we took for making a really great mission statement.
For multiple years, our family was working on self governing ourselves. And
trying to become the best family that we could be. My husband and I had this
picture in our minds of who we wanted to become as the Peck family. But we hadn't
really articulated this picture to the children because it was just something
that was our goal. And so, every time we would give them instruction or correct
them, they would go with the flow on it. But they really weren't as fully
invested as we wanted them to be. So, finally we decided we needed to give
them a view of this picture that we had created for our family. So, we shared with
them a story that was going to take place in the future that we had created
as a couple for our family vision. And I have other videos that talk about family
visions. So, if you're a subscriber to this channel then you'll probably hear
that video at some point along the way or go find it. Anyway, after we made the
family vision and shared it with the children, then we knew we had started the
ball rolling on getting them fully invested. We needed a statement, a family
mission statement that could be said every day so that we would remember who
we are, where we're going and how we're going to get there. The location for the
beginning of our family mission statement it was kind of funny. It was on
a car ride. We were going to Grandma's house for a Sunday dinner on a Sunday
afternoon. We started discussing who our family really was and where we were
going. And we shared our vision and then we said, "We need to make a statement of
who we are as this family and where we're going and how, more importantly, how
we're going to get there." Because that's the difference between the mission and
vision. Vision is why you care and what the picture is. And the mission is how
you're going to accomplish it. So, I had a piece of paper handy and I said, "Okay,
everybody. Tell me a list of words that describe how our family needs to behave
with each other, needs to communicate, needs to
problem-solve, needs to feel in order to become this family that's part of our
family vision." So, from the car, people were throwing out different words and I
was writing them all on a list. And as I wrote them down, I compared the ones that
were like each other and got rid of ones that seemed too similar to others. And we
put this together as a master list. Now, it's hard to say a list, that doesn't
make as much sense. So, my husband took the list of words and he smithed them. He
turned them into a workable document that we could use as a family to say
everyday. Then we presented it to our children and this started the process of
the daily rendition of the Peck family mission statement. Which happens every
single day after we say prayer as a family. So, we're a praying family, we pray
morning and night. After that morning prayer we just immediately start saying
that Peck family mission statement. Before we told our children the dream
that we had for our family and allowed them to invest in helping us make this
mission statement, they didn't seem to really care as much about what we were
doing as a family. But after we made the mission statement, all of a sudden, they
took ownership of what we were doing as a family. And this was a powerful force
for change in the Peck family culture. So, this is what we did: We took 6 simple
steps to create a really effective family mission statement. Step number 1,
we shared our parents vision of what type of a family we were creating. And
this involved a story that took place at a certain time in the future.
Step 2, we had a meeting where we made a list of all of the words that we
wanted to incorporate in our family mission statement that would explain how
we were going to accomplish this vision for the Peck family. Step 3, we took the
list and chose the most important words. And combined words that were like other
words so that we could narrow it down to a more fine-tuned picture
of how we were going to accomplish our vision goal. Step 5 was making the
document. My husband took some time to form those lists of words that we had
created into sentences that could be personal for each of us. Step 5,
we chose to speak in the present tense. Even though our vision was 20 years in
the future when we originally made it, how we were going to get there needed to
be happening each and every day. So, our Peck family mission statement
says words like "we do", "we are". So that it speaks as if this is what we do right
now today. Present tense is powerful. It tells the brain, "I am already acting on
this." And that helps the person make choices that they wouldn't normally make
if it's just a hope for the future." Step 6, we presented the document to the
children in a family meeting. We have regular family meetings. If you're a
subscriber to this channel, there are videos about those family meetings. In
one of these regular family meetings, we brought out documents that we had made
beautiful. And we presented them to each of the children on these documents was
written word for word the entire Peck family mission statement. We then
practice saying it together, committed it to memory and said it every day from
then on. I know that even when my children are all gone from my home which
is happening quicker than I would like. We will still say this. My husband and I
will still pray for our family together each day and we will say the Peck family
mission statement. Because it even applies to the 2 of us alone when the
family is not here. And I hope that my children will think of making a mission
statement for themselves when they are starting their families. You know, I've
got an idea. I think I'm gonna go get Porter. He doesn't even know that he's
going to get picked on. But I think I'm going to go and get him out of
room and have him come and say the Peck family mission statement for you. Because
hearing it from him might even be better than hearing it from me. Alright. So,
here's Porter. He is going to say with me the Peck family mission statement for
you. Thank you for joining us, Porter. Yeah. Okay, Porter is sixteen. He's
been saying this mission statement since probably he's been alive almost. I can't
remember how old you were when we put it into action. You were probably a little
toddler. So, I don't think he remembers a day not saying it, really. I mean, unless
we just forgot that day which could happen if we were out of town or
something happened. Anyway, okay. Ready, Porter? Here we go. Nice and clear. Okay. We,
the Peck family will love support and be united with one another. We are dedicated
to building an atmosphere of trust, faith and learning in our home. We spread love
and happiness to others. We know that we are children of God and endeavor to
return to his presence as an eternal family. We have patience and wisdom in
our relationships, Heavenly Father guides and loves each of
us so that we can fulfill our life's missions.
Yes! You did it. Awesome. Thanks for joining me. Sorry to pull you out of your
room like that. But you can go and hide yourself while I make the rest of the
video. Okay. That was kind of fun, right? To hear from Porter. My children have to
hide themselves out where they can be quiet and just accomplish a few things
when I do these videos. So, he was definitely not expecting that. But you
can see he knows it really well and we do say it every single day. There are
many times where there have been arguments or moments that didn't go as
smooth in the family and I would say, "Remember how we the Peck family will
love support and be united with one another?" And they'll say, "Oh, yeah." And I'll
say, "Yeah, this doesn't feel very supported and united right now, does it?"
"No, mom. It doesn't." And they know in their hearts that they need to make a change.
Then we talk about what changes that they need to make. Self-government which
is what we teach in our home and what my programs are all about. And this family
mission statement and vision that I've been discussing, those
are all about the hearts investing. The hearts uniting. The hearts changing
together. That's what it's all about. It's just a good condition of heart that's
United with the family. And I hope your family can have that like mine does. I
hope that you could feel when Porter was here with me what a good dynamic that we
have in our relationship. How willing he is to just help me with something
and how much that we really understand each other. The video that I think you'll
enjoy watching now is How To Make Someone Feel Understood