Today we ask the age old question.
- Will it fruitcake? - Let's talk about that.
♪(intro music)♪
Good Mythical Morning.
Welcome to the last episode of season ten
- of Good Mythical Morning. - What?
And remember, we are taking a short break for the holidays.
We will be back in action
with season eleven, Monday, January sixteenth.
Yeah, but for right now, today it is Christmas Eve-eve.
- Yeah. - It's the eve squared.
If math were applied to this, and it shouldn't be.
- No - Let's leave math out of this.
You also take a break from math.
Bring that back in January too.
There's fruitcake flying around everywhere,
- but nobody's eating it. - Yeah, I haven't.
- That's what happens at Christmas time. - Right.
You know, people give it, people re-gift it.
- It lasts forever. - It's the same fruitcake over and over,
- every year. - Use it as a door stop.
It was all made in 1935.
Use it as step stools.
I've accumulated so much that I think I can use it as a step stool.
- Yeah, you could build a home with that. - Not really.
I've never actually eaten it, until today, because I think it needed
- a little bit of improvement. - Right.
So now we ask,
- ♪(Christmas music)♪ - (both) Will it fruitcake?
Okay, let's get started with the first one.
Bring it on out.
Link, I know you're going to be excited about this, brother.
This is the Froot Loop cake.
Yes, because why eat fruit when you can eat Froot Loops?
(Link) I've said that my entire life.
And then I'm like, what if you don't have them,
and then you eat Fruity Pebbles.
Right, well there's Fruity Pebbles in here as well.
And here's the thing-- You can touch this with your own hands,
you don't have to touch it with my hands, or I don't have to touch it with my hands.
Can you use my hands to pick it up?
Yeah.
(crew laughs)
There you go.
Any time you want to use my hands to...
- Now, don't eat it yet. - Okay, just hold it.
Just hold it right there. There you go. You're ready.
Now, the beautiful thing about this is that, I don't know what
the fruit in fruitcake is. It's this gelatinous mess
that is definitely-- May have been fruit at one point,
- but is definitely not fruit now. - It's like fossilized fruit.
Yeah, and I consider Froot Loops and Fruity Pebbles to be
an upgrade on real fruit, and I think most dietitians agree with me.
- Yeah, and I am one of them. - Yeah.
Alright, so let's dink it,
not think it, and sink it.
It's actually flaky somehow.
Flaky? Is that a good thing?
I need to dip it in milk.
It does call for milk, but we don't have any.
Oh, man, it's still so good though.
This is a hit, especially amongst the children,
(Rhett) who like to eat the sugary things.
Of all ages.
I mean this one, it's just so simple.
You knew that this was going to work.
You knew this was going to make us happy.
But I wasn't going to not bite it.
In the shape of a smiley face for a reason.
(Link) Will it fruitcake?
- (ding sound) - (both) Yes.
Okay, we are calling this one, Happy cake.
We have taken an entire McDonald's Happy Meal
(Link) and fruitcake-ized it.
(Link) There is a cheese burger, there are fries.
You got a knife over there?
I got a knife over here. (knife clangs on floor)
- Oh! - Oh gosh.
- It's a little-- - Hey, listen, guys,
don't put the knife on Link's side.
- It's a little soiled. - I thought that we had discussed this.
You do not give the man weapons.
Have you not learned that yet?
There's a cheese burger. There's cheese burger throughout.
There's fries throughout.
And, of course, there is a Happy Meal toy
somewhere in here. One lucky recip-rient--
- Recip-rient? - Recip-rient, gets the toy.
- (Rhett) Let me cut you a slice. - (Link) See if you can strike toy.
(Link) Oh, that is thick.
Of course, there's special Big Mac sauce all over the top of this thing.
Not that you typically get that with a Happy Meal,
- Secret sauce? - but when you're at McDonald's,
you might as well.
Oh gosh. I've got a full burger here,
I'm trying to get apart.
- There you go. - Look at that cross section.
- (Link) Oh. - (crew laughs)
Gracious. Look at that.
See if you can strike toy, man.
(Link) Nope. Go again.
Nope.
- (Rhett) Oh! (laughs) - (Link) (yells)
(all laugh)
Third time's a charm.
Look at that dude.
Now, what is that?
- (Rhett) A Snoopy? - (Link) It's a toy.
- (Link) That's all that matters. - (Rhett) Snoopy's different these days.
Why'd they have to upgrade Snoopy? That's not Snoopy, is it?
I don't know or care.
Let me just get my own piece here.
(Link) Man, it's just baked all together.
I've got-- I don't think I got much fries in mine, but I got two cheese burgers
(Link) in my cross section.
Your piece is a little prettier than mine, but it's all the same stuff.
Napkin.
(crew laughs)
Napkin.
Thank you.
You want to use my hand for that?
No, I don't want to use your hand.
Just imagine taking everything from a Happy Meal,
squishing it together, refrigerating it, and then eating it,
and you're pretty much sharing our experience right now.
But, is that a bad thing?
- No, it's not a bad thing. - (Link) No, not really.
For special occasions, people typically get, like, a bucket of chicken,
or a bucket of chicken, for, like a gathering.
Did you say bucket of chicken twice?
- Yeah, 'cause it's the only option. - (Rhett) Okay.
But I think McDonald's can get in on it with, like, their Happy cake.
(Link) But will it fruitcake?
- (buzzer sound) - (both) No.
Okay, coming right up.
Now, I am especially excited about this one, Link.
Now this one is golden brown, but it's got even browner parts
(Link) peaking out of it. Like here.
Well, you know what that is, Link,
that's a salami. This is the salami and cheese cake.
Now, one of the other things that gets passed around
during holiday times, and my Grandpa McLaughlin, is what we used to call him.
We called him Grandpa McLaughlin, that's how formal we were.
Okay.
He would send us salami, and cheese, and crackers,
- in one of those huge arrangements. - Like a gift box.
And I was the only one in my family that liked it,
and I just sat there, as a child, and just ate salami, cheese,
until I got so constipated that they'd have to call a doctor.
(laughs)
But I loved it, and so this has two full salamis, cheese,
and then the crackers that came with the set,
were just crumbled up and made into the cake.
With mustard.
And the mustard is built in.
(Rhett) Turn it this way.
Oh gosh, there's all kinds of things in there.
Should I hold onto this?
You should hold it. Grasp it.
(Link) Alright. (makes sawing sound)
(Link) It's like chopping down a tree. Oh!
I'll cut us a couple of slices.
Oh goodness.
Got you one in here too, brother. (strained sounds)
Talking like Hulk Hogan?
(impersonates Hulk Hogan) I'll get you one, brother.
(laughs) Look. Say hello to that bullseye of wonderful.
(Link and crew laugh)
Now, I got an idea. Hold that one up to your right eye.
You look like a frog, man.
Thank you, Grandpa McLaughlin.
Dink it.
Bite it.
Oh, it's thick.
Oh.
- That's a lot of salami to take. - Salami slices are typically
thinner than this.
(Link) Like, ten times thinner.
I'm not complaining at all, though.
It's like a heart attack in my mouth, man.
- And? - I like it.
- I think it's great-- - There's something to this.
(Rhett) Will it fruitcake?
- (ding sound) - (both) Yes.
And now we present to you, what we're calling, the toot cake.
It is a fruitcake with ingredients that make you toot.
Give you gas, Rhett.
Right, this is fruit cake with effect.
Right, it has beans, broccoli, brussel sprouts inside,
and then it has a beans and Haribo sugar-free Gummy Bear sauce
over the top, because, as you know those sugar-free Gummy Bears
are notorious for giving you, not only gas, but explosive diarrhea.
Just read the reviews on Amazon, they're hilariously painful,
or painfully hilarious.
Now, you can give this to somebody as a little bit of a prank,
but if you're going to eat it yourself, I may suggest, that you take
some antacid that we have crumbled into a sugary form.
- (Link) Yes. - (Rhett) I'm just going to sprinkle
(Rhett) the antacid all over the top.
(Rhett) It's got a great Christmas-y flavor and look to it.
It looks like some sort or peppermint candy.
(Rhett) And then, just gonna pick this up for you, right here.
- Set it right on your plate. - Okay.
And I'll eat right off of here.
It's a little gelatinous.
How can this be bad?
Well, I can think of a few ways.
(Link) Oh, man, it is floppy.
It's more like a jello mold.
(gags)
What? You're vomiting over there already?
The brocolli is rancid-y.
Come on.
(mockingly) 'mon.
(gags)
- Not bad. - (crew laughs)
Once you get past that initial dry heave.
I definitely taste antacid.
And that helps.
- A lot. It really does. - It does.
Antacid almost tastes like it would be good just--
Just straight up.
(Stevie) Eugh!
Give me a dip, man.
Try a little bit of that. That's some good stuff.
It really makes the medicine go down, doesn't it?
It does.
- And it is medicine. - (both laugh)
Medicine helps the medicine go down.
That's so good.
But let's not fool ourselves. This is bad.
(crew laughs)
I thought you were--
That's good. Let's just eat antacid.
(laughs) Okay.
Antacid. Will it antacid?
(laughs) Yes.
(Rhett) Toot cake, will it fruitcake?
- (buzzer sound) - (both) No.
It's funny how I started sweating.
Thank you.
Okay.
Now, Guardians of the Galaxy 2 is coming out soon.
- I mean, May 2017. - (crew laughs)
But, you know, it's never too early to start celebrating,
and we are celebrating our favorite character from the series, Groot.
- With the Groot cake. - (laughs)
(Rhett) It's a fruitcake, filled to the brim, with sawdust,
and then covered with wood chips, and moss.
Surely, this is going to be good, right?
- You're going to need extra for this. - Woah!
- (crew laughs) - You gave him a freaking back-up knife?
How many times do we have to have this conversation?
He only gets rubber knives.
(Link) (gruff voice) I kill Groot.
I'm not comfortable with-- Oh gosh.
Is that glue on top? Is that a paste?
- (crew member) Frosting. - (Rhett) So, frosting.
Jelly bean eyes. You're going right through the eyes?
I feel like I need to use the saw motion.
Oh, you got to use that one? Oh.
(Link) Getting all lumberjack on it.
(Link) Oh my goodness.
He'll grow it back, right? He comes back.
Yeah, he comes back.
(Link) Oh, his guts are marshmallow or something.
Instead of trying to figure out a way to slice that, why don't you just take
that hunk and set it on a plate.
Oh my goodness.
(gruff voice) I eat Groot.
I think all you do is you just take a bite, and see what happens.
But get some bark in it, like that.
- I got bark right there. - (makes clunking sound)
Fiber.
It's hard to chew.
Yeah, these parts.
These, like, very side of a tree bark part.
(Link) You got, like, grass hanging out of your mouth.
That's tough right there.
That's too much.
Not very tender.
I'd recommend, when eating a Groot cake, that you allot plenty of time,
to just take it easy.
There's a man who ate a complete plane, you know.
- Yeah. - It just took him a while.
- It can be done. - Right.
But you really gotta work on it.
The parts that you can't get down, just suck all the cake off of it,
and just pull that out.
It's kinda like the opposite of putting together a puzzle.
But, you know, a shorter way to do this, is to just to eat cake,
without the wood in it.
You know what I mean?
Well that's like building a puzzle that's just a picture.
- It didn't work. Okay. - (crew laughs)
- So-- - Great idea.
Hopefully it'll serve as a great promotion for the movie,
and we'll be asked to do that, you know, during the opening weekend.
We'll bring Groot cake to the premiere.
(Link) But, for now, Groot cake, will it fruitcake?
- (buzzer sound) - (both) No
Now we have the pupate cake.
Those are not pecans. Those are all pupate,
which, according to sources, pupate is the non-feeding,
usually immobile transformation stage between larvae and the imago stages.
Yeah, the imago stage.
(Link) And, we have different kinds here. We got super worms, meal worms,
sago worms, and silk worms.
I'm not too afraid of the crunchy ones.
But there's some mushy-- Oh gosh.
I just pressed on that one, and something shot out of its abdomen.
I know, something-- Juice came--
(Rhett) Look at that. Oh gosh. He's so juicy. Oh, man.
Grab your plate.
Again, insects; it's the future of survival.
Yeah, we have to do this.
Again, there's going to come a time, where you're not going to--
Oh gosh. I put a grub in my friggen drink.
Where you don't have a choice, let me--
Sprinkling.
We've gotta do this.
We gotta do this for the people of the world.
This is what Christmas is going to be all about, in like fifty years.
Right.
This is the future of Christmas.
Get a good-- Get a nice bite,
with at least six or seven of these suckers on it.
Oh gosh.
(Rhett) He's shaking. Look how bad--
He's shaking so bad. Why are you shaking so bad?
You need some encouragement?
(shouts) Let's get ready to pupate.
(laughs)
Three, two, one.
(both gag)
Got it-- Got it on the desk.
(gags)
(both gag)
(crew laughs)
(gags)
- What time is it? - Time to pupate?
It's Christmas time.
- Christmas time. - In the city.
♪ It's Christmas time in the city. ♪
Man, you got pu-pus all over your lips, man.
(crew laughs)
Sorry.
I'm feeling the Christmas spirit.
- Have you cheeked it? - I'm crying.
Me too, man. I'm gonna put it on my tongue.
I'm just gonna slam it down.
What?
I'm gonna put it on the tongue, and I'm gonna slam it down.
You ready?
(both) ♪ Ring-a-ling. Ding-a-ling. ♪
(both) ♪ Soon-- (unintelligible)
Alright, here we go.
- Countdown. - Hold on. That's not how I'm doing it.
I'm in the zone, man.
(crew make disgusted sounds)
(Link) What are you doing?
- You alright? - No.
I'm making progress, though.
I'm not making any progress. I'm just gonna slam it down in--
It helps to put a napkin in your hand, and just rustle it.
- And don't look at anything. - (Link) Oh, I'm not.
Just pick a spot, like an ice skater that's spinning.
- (laughs) - Merry Christmas!
- (shouts) And to all a good night. Woo! - Woo!
Pupate cake, will it fruitcake?
- (buzzer sound) - (both) No.
It will not. Of course it won't.
What, do you think we're crazy?
You should smell our breath right now. (laughs)
Boy, that's redefined Christmas for me forever.
- (exhales) - Oh gosh.
Thank you for liking, commenting, and subscribing.
You know what time it is?
Hi, this is Mehak, and I'm from India,
and it's time to spin the Wheel of Mythicality.
If you liked today's episode, well you're going to love our appearance
on The Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon, tonight on NBC.
Check that out.
And also check out the season finale of Good Mythical Crew
tomorrow morning on this channel, where you can see Mike and Alex
(Rhett) go to Santa Con to find the real Santa.
Click through to Good Mythical More, because we've got our crew, gonna come
- out and eat some more of this food. - Yeah
- (fanfare music) - Gifticality. That means we're going
to give one thousand dollars to St. Jude Children's Hospital,
to help them in their fight against childhood cancer and other
- life-threatening diseases. - Yes.
Join us in donating by going to StJude.org/givethanks.
[Captioned by Jack GMM Captioning Team]