You haven't lived well enough. You haven't lived hard enough.
You haven't tried everything your body can do.
You haven't pushed your body to the limit.
I beg to differ.
I think I've lived a great life not shitting in showers.
Peeing in the shower. Okay, or not okay?
Not okay.
Okay. Not okay.
Okay.
Peeing in the shower is environmentally conscious.
You're not using toilet paper.
You're not spending all the time over there.
You're not flushing, which is-
Excess water.
Okay, people say that, that it's like environmentally conscious,
but you're going to have to use more water
to now get piss off yourself.
Less than you would if you were just clean.
That's not true.
If you're environmentally conscious,
you would take three minutes showers.
Nobody's walking around here pissing in showers.
We're just saying if you're already going to shower,
might as well pee in there instead of wasting
the toilet water. [crosstalk 00:00:51].
Then you've got to wash your legs more.
You don't understand what peeing in the shower is like.
Wait, why are you peeing all of your legs?
Well how else do you pee?
Like this. Okay put your legs... Stand up.
Yeah.
He's a lady because he's me.
He's peeing. Boom. Right between the legs.
You got to clean this, but you don't have to clean your legs.
The only way you can pee in the shower,
and you wouldn't be doing that because you'd have soap.
So is that how you're soaping yourselves?
You don't do that.
I'm a lady.
I just want to talk about the physics of splash back.
When you're peeing into a toilet,
it's incredibly difficult to make it into the hole.
And that's evidenced by the fact
that you constantly see little bits,
droplets or even like full pools on the side of the rim.
Now when you're in the shower,
it just focuses the stream down directly into the drain.
You're peeing, the water pushes down directly into the drain.
It's more freeing and there's less hazard.
What about shower clogs? Everybody gets shower clogs.
Yeah, your pee's not going to clog the shower.
It's your hair that clogs the shower.
No, no. You're just going to pee inside of a filling up shower
and now you're standing in just pissing water.
Every shower is a bath. Okay?
First of all. Every shower is a bath.
That's not true.
Some showers are just standup showers.
No, every shower is a bath.
No, bath tub shower.
You let the water get to your knees and it's muddy,
it's gross because you're not cleaning the-
You're letting the hair in there.
And which means the piss is-
now you're just got a bath tub full of piss.
You're just bathing in piss.
Where are you guys showering?
In my house.
You need to get one of those like hair removers things
because-
No, hair's biodegradable. I've got to wait.
What? You just got...
What did you say?
Hair's biodegradable. I got to wait.
Yeah, but it's going to take forever.
4,000 years.
Take it out of your drain.
That's so yucky.
And put it in your fridge.
In my fridge?
I mean your freezer for your compost bin.
You guys all compost, right?
Because you care about the environment.
I make little dolls.
Oh re-use.
You guys just need to try it.
You're telling me you haven't tried peeing shower.
If I allow myself to be in the shower, what's next?
Right next thing my body's like,
"Oh, I guess the rules are pee wherever you want".
I'm sitting in the middle of my meeting,
I'm doing a presentation. My body's like,
"Well before you weren't waiting for the toilet,
you just went anywhere. Why not pee now?"
And then all of a sudden,
I'm pissing in front of the board of directors.
Exactly.
No self control.
In which case that's fine as long as
you're wearing adult diapers.
That's an extra step.
I'm not going to do that because if I'm wearing an adult diaper,
then I get a big, big butt and an also big front area.
Big butt front area. Yes. Yes.
It's going to be- Big butt. And get a front area.
It's going to be significantly puffy.
It's going to be significantly puffy on both ends.
But some people like a puffy area front area.
That's not my personality.
Okay. It's not your personality, but they also-
We'll get you pants.
If you're peeing in the shower,
why not just take a shit in the shower too?
Shit the shower. Just take a shit in the shower.
You're cleaning yourself. It's getting clean.
Why not?
Well, you could.
You could. Yeah. I don't understand.
You guys are going to sit in the shower now.
I have one time as a kid.
I'm sorry you haven't?
No.
You haven't gotten confused one time?
No because I've told myself-
You don't shit in the shower.
If you haven't shit in the shower
you haven't lived well enough. Haven't lived hard enough,
you haven't tried everything your body can do.
You haven't pushed your body to the limit.
I beg to differ.
I think I've lived a great life not shitting in showers.
I think I've been very convenient for other people
that have to use that shower.
You guys would it be okay for people pissing
and shitting in showers and you're next?
You poop in the shower and then how does it go down the drain?
You smash it down. You smash it down.
Yeah exactly, I smash it down.
You're just going to smash it down
with your feet and your hands?
Mallet.
You're going to carry a mallet? Into the shower?
You have a little mallet for the shower
so you can smash down your poop.
That sounds like a lot of steps to me.
You hear how inconvenient that is.
I am not fighting for me to smash my poop down.
I'm fighting for me to pee in the shower.
It's the same, it's all the same.
I'm just explaining why it makes sense to pee
in somewhere where you get clean.
Body waste. It's all the same. It's in the shower.
Oh, it's clean. It's going down the drain.
Why not shit?
Okay. Let's say you do pee in the shower.
If you don't clean your drain enough,
the urea will crystallize and clog your pipes
and then you got to get a plumber
to come in and fix your shower.
Yeah. You ever seen a rusty drain?
What website did you find this on?
I typed it into Quora.
People responded, sent me some websites.
I had to put some money down.
What?
You paid?
Yeah. Why did you pay it?
It's just a bunch of Giphy images, okay?
Sounds fun.
Sounds like pisslovesme.com.
Piss Loves Me is the premier stepsister.
I learned that piss turns into rocks
and if you collect enough your dreams will come true.
What?
That sounds like alchemy. That's like an ancient magic.
I've meeting with the board of directors and you haven't so.
What board of directors?
Are you presenting the board of directors too?
Do you believe in this crystal pee stuff?
What's going on?
I don't know about that,
but I do know that piss can corrode metal.
And what are the drains made out?
Metal.
It sounds real, but where did you learn that?
A quick Google search. Easy.
So if I were to quickly google?
Go for it.
Can piss corrode metal?
You'll just find my question.
Type it in.
All right, here, you ask Siri. Hey Siri.
Does piss corrode metal?
She's thinking.
Here's what I found.
That says, "Does pigs corrode metal?"
So I'll just have to adjust that.
They might too.
When the shower's coming down,
you can put your butt in the shower,
you can spread your legs
and then the pee and water create a combo
that just heads right down to the drain.
You don't know what you're cleaning with.
Because then if you got your...
What is that called? A loofah, right?
And you're like, "Oh, it's just water".
But turns out what you're also getting on there as pee,
so you've got a water pee mix,
then you've got that on your loofah.
Put soap on it you'll be fine.
So you're washing yourself and then you leave your house
and you're like, "Oh, I smell kind of like soap,
but then I'll smell kind of like pee".
Smell me. Do I smell like pee?
You smell a little like pee.
Really?
Just a little.
That's not bad.
You smell it a little like pee, but it's not bad.
Seriously?
I definitely smell the scent of piss.
Yes.
Oh my God.
We all pee, I don't know how many times a day.
Maybe seven or 10 times a day or something like that.
And why feel shamed about putting your pee
into one bucket versus a different bucket?
It's all going to the same place.
The ocean.
Where did I read that?
dumbshit.net.
No. Or dumbfucksincorporated.com.
Wow. No, I read it, you know where I typed it into Quora?
I typed it into Quora.
What website? What website?
I typed it and yeah. Quora.