In the world of Adult Animated shows, marriages are a common type of relationship to focus on.
There are many reasons for this, but the main purpose is to be a spin on the traditional
“nuclear family”. Because a lot of these are spins on classic tropes,
not all of these relationships are particularly good or healthy. So,
which of these Adult Cartoon marriages are healthy and which are utterly toxic?
I’m Caleb with WickedBinge, and this is Adult Cartoon Marriages: Healthy to Toxic.
A couple of rules are necessary before we get started: firstly they must be from an
adult animated cartoon, so shows that have adult themes but are still marketed towards children
like Adventure Time and Regular Show don’t make the list. Secondly, they must be married, whether
we see their wedding or they confirm it at some point, they can’t just be dating or engaged but
actually married. Finally, only one married couple per series.
With our rules set we can talk about the best relationships on this list
these are The Healthy Relationships
The gold medal of healthiness goes to Moxxie and Millie from Helluva Boss. While the two of them
are trained killers and literal demons they are shown to be quite loving throughout the show.
The two of them are shown to tease each other at times but that’s not particularly
a toxic trait. It’s even shown in the latest episode at the time of writing this “Ozzie’s”
that not only do the two of them still go on dates but the fact they actively love each other
is shown to be at least slightly abnormal for hell. Moxxie is shown to write songs for Millie
and the two of them even work together quite well. Not only is this unique for an adult
animated show but it’s doubly unique on account they are literally from Hell.
Earning our silver medal of healthiness is Princess Carolyn and Judah Mannowdog from
BoJack Horseman. PC had been a major character in BoJack Horseman since the very first episode
and had been through her fair share of relationships, including with BoJack
himself. Judah started off as PC’s assistant in Season 3 but gets fired in the subsequent
season because he refused Charlie Witherspoon’s offer without informing PC it even existed. They
eventually start working together again in Season 6 and eventually realize their love together.
We don’t really get to see their married life but their relationship is shown to be sweet
and caring from both ends. Judah leaves his band to play without him to help PC at work
while PC leaves work to go see Judah’s band, this is where Judah reveals he actually wrote
a love song for PC which is why he was a bit sad when she wouldn’t be able to come to his show.
Judah and PC don’t get a lot of screen time together but what we do see is quite nice and they
only rank lower than Moxxie and Millie because we sadly don’t get to see too much of them.
The bronze medal of healthiness goes to none other than The Monarch and Dr. Mrs. The Monarch from The
Venture Bros. The both of them met while working under Phantom Limb and The Monarch wooed her,
where she became Dr. Girlfriend and worked as his number two. Sure, the two of them are
supervillains but that doesn’t change how good they are to and for each other. Sure, The Monarch
did get supremely jealous of her at one point and did go behind her back which didn’t go very well,
and the two of them did break up, but in the end, they got back together and became much stronger.
The two of them are not only good for each other but are quite fun to watch, hence their ranking.
Ranking next on our list is Bob and Linda Belcher from Bob’s Burgers.
Being the titular characters of the show, most of the show focuses on their relationship,
and the two of them are actually quite happy together. Sure, like all married couples they
have their issues, like Bob falling into the typical trope of forgetting their anniversary.
They are never really seen fighting, and even episodes where they do quote-unquote fight
it’s never abusive, it’s usually about Bob being forgetful. But in general, they’re a good couple
because they work together quite well, not only in the restaurant but in their personal lives.
They challenge each other quite well which makes them quite the pair, and they only rank
outside the top three because they do fight more often than the others, even though not by much.
From King of The Hill, our next couple is Hank and Peggy Hill. Hank and Peggy
are another couple like Bob and Linda who don’t really have very many problems. Sure, the two
of them fight whenever Peggy gets a new job or Hank gets addicted to video games and the like
but it’s not like whole episodes are made about it. Hank does seem to really love Peggy though,
but due to his conservative lean, he doesn’t always enjoy some of her exploits. They argue
on occasion about Peggy teaching sex ed or how to raise Bobby, but most of it’s not really that bad,
it never goes beyond a petty dinner argument, and doesn’t come close to fistfighting. So
honestly, Hank and Peggy aren’t a bad couple in the slightest but they do have to rank here from
necessity as they aren’t nearly as quote-unquote perfect as the previous entrants on our list.
Next up are Cleveland Brown and Donna Tubbs from The Cleveland Show. Cleveland and Donna
met in high school but didn’t get together until much later in life. They have a very
strong relationship, although they do tease and fight on occasion. Cleveland loves Donna
enough to take on Roberta and Rallo as stepchildren after the two get married.
They do fight occasionally but it seems to be more trivial compared to some of the others on
our list and They honestly don’t have very many problems. They do fall here because
they have more problems than the previous entrants, although it’s not really by much.
Rounding out the healthy section of our list is Kif Kroker and Amy Wong from Futurama.
Kif and Amy are a relationship that had been set up since near the beginning of the show.
And yes, the two of them aren’t technically married in the traditional sense but they did
complete the wedding ceremony of Kif’s people so we count them. The two of them are actually
quite the good couple as Kif is able to “quell” Amy’s more promiscuous side for
most of the series. They do have their fair share of scandals such as Amy sleeping with Zapp after
Kif is dead and Kif not wanting to stay with her after this, but in the end, they do get together
again and are much stronger for it. You also can’t fully blame Amy for the decision she made,
Because Zapp does like to pray on disadvantaged or grieving people, but we understand Kif’s decision.
Despite their generally great relationship, their baggage is enough to place them here on the list.
With the healthy relationships talked about we move down to the Relationship Gray Area.
The original Adult Cartoon Married Couple, Homer and Marge Simpson from The Simpsons
start the gray area. Homer and Marge are the classic examples of an adult married couple,
they met in high school and got married mostly because Marge got pregnant. There are plenty of
episodes focusing on their marriage, whether it be when they got married a second time or
Homer supposedly cheating. But after all of these events they get back together,
their relationship has even survived Marge’s amnesia or severe injuries to both parties.
Homer and Marge have a strong relationship and stick by each other even in tough situations.
However, they do fight often, Homer’s antics tend to cause severe trouble for Marge, such as framing
her for a drunk driving accident and the future episodes show they don’t tend to stay together,
hence why we have to pull them down some from the good section into our gray area.
The next couple in the Gray area is Marty and Barbara Glouberman from Big Mouth. Due to the
main characters of Big Mouth being teenagers we don’t really get to see too much of this
relationship. From what we can see though is that Marty is a strongly opinionated man and
generally abusive to Andrew but not really towards Barbara. They do fight on occasion but not really
more than the average couple and Barbara just kind of submits to whatever Marty is doing at the time.
Sure, Barbara does sort of come into her own when the Menopause Banshee comes around,
but even after that she just kind of falls to the back and lets Marty do whatever he feels is
necessary. If it wasn’t for Marty’s abusive tendencies they might rank a bit higher.
Reigning from F is for Family, up next is Frank and Sue Murphy. Frank and Sue,
much like most of this list met quite young and got married because Frank got Sue pregnant. The
two share quite a loving relationship although it is strained at times due to the financial
problems the two of them face. Frank is even shown to be quite jealous of Sue at times
because he didn’t get to live his dream but she seems to live hers. Frank does love Sue
with all his heart and is mostly unaware of how badly he treats Sue. Frank is not shown
to be particularly abusive to her or the kids and seems to be all bark and no bite because he and
Sue do argue but that’s about it. Frank even publicly states how much he loves Sue and was
willing to die because of how he was treating her, realizing it was a massive mistake. They
also are pretty good partners and play off each other well, which is always important to have
in a partner, so we’re confident in their placement in this part of the list.
Rounding out the Gray Area is Beth and Jerry Smith from Rick and Morty. Beth and Jerry fall
into the same trap as a lot of the characters on this list because they got together when
Beth got pregnant with Summer. But, unlike the others, their marriage is not nearly as strong,
“Rixty Minutes” showed they both would have been successful if they didn’t get together and they do
get divorced later on in the show. Jerry is shown to not particularly respect Beth’s job as a horse
surgeon and Beth sees Jerry as sort of a worm. It’s also revealed that Beth only really stays
with Jerry because she knows he would never leave her, which is a product of her abandonment issues,
having Rick as a father. However, they don’t fall into the toxic section because they do
truly love each other to some degree. At the end of the aforementioned “Rixty Minutes,”
it’s implied they are some sort of soulmates and they do get back together by the end of Season 3.
They do care about each other and their children enough to save them in the Gray Area.
With the Gray Area settled we move down to the worst of the worst,
these are The Toxic Relationships
Starting off the Toxic section of our list is Lana Kane and Robert from Archer. The reason they fall
in the Toxic section is quite obvious actually. It seems Lana only married Robert for his money
and still loves Archer instead. It seems the money is being used for Lana and Archer’s baby,
and honestly, we can understand that. Robert is openly racist, and calls sleeping with black women
“Exotic”, and Lana just doesn’t like him at all. Robert is also more than happy
to keep big and important secrets from Lana, as long as it saves his own bacon,
and he doesn’t seem to particularly care for her, although we can’t be sure. The only reason they
don’t fall further is that they’re not openly abusive, Lana’s just using Robert for money.
Ranking right outside the bottom three is Stan and Francine Smith from American Dad!.
Stan and Francine are another couple where it’s quite obvious why they fall here,
even their first meeting is quite interesting. Stan can be seen as downright emotionally abusive,
but not particularly physically abusive. He tricks his family into believing that they
were going on vacation while he watched sports. It’s also revealed that both he and Francine
are only together for shallow reasons in the episode “Shallow Vows” and they are shown to
threaten each other if the situation comes to it. Stan and Francine do love each other to a degree,
and Francine does cherish her position as a “trophy wife” but that doesn’t stop the abuse
they sling at each other. Luckily, the abuse is mostly verbal and emotional, and while we never
thought we’d say that as a positive, that is definitely a positive compared to some of the
other couples we haven’t talked about yet. So, due to a lack of severe or consistent abuse on
both the physical and emotional levels, we can’t put them in the bottom three in good conscience.
Bogarting the bronze medal of toxicity is South Park’s Randy and Sharon Marsh. We’ve
talked about these two before, and while they aren’t the most toxic relationship in South Park
they are still quite toxic. Both of them are quite hotheaded and while Sharon tends to be the more
level-headed of the two even that’s not always true. They fight verbally in a lot of episodes,
especially after Randy buys and starts operating Tegridy Farms. It goes to the point where they
get divorced and remarried in one episode, and do physically fight in the episode “Pandemic”.
By late in the series, Sharon throws a party because Randy is getting arrested,
showing they pretty much hate each other and earlier episodes do confirm that they
were faking the happiness that they felt around each other. But at least they don’t
consistently physically abuse each other as the following set of couples on this list.
Speaking of, snatching our silver medal of toxicity is Peter and Lois Griffin from Family
Guy. Anyone who has watched Family Guy knows that these two share a massively abusive relationship.
Both of them verbally and physically abuse each other and their children, especially Meg.
They also fight more often than most of these couples, and while not many episodes focus on
their marriage issues, the ones that do show they don’t get through it as quickly as others.
They don’t fall to the bottom because it does seem they do care about each other quite a lot,
as they have had at least four children together and they stayed together even
after Peter killed one of them. Lois at one point even loved Peter enough to not
take millions of dollars from Carter when he offered her that rather than marry him. So,
yes, while they are quite abusive towards each other, they actually love each other
to some degree, which is more than we can say for our next entrant on the list.
Speaking of, grabbing the gold medal of toxicity is King Zog and Queen Dagmar from Matt Groening’s
Disenchantment. Zog and Dagmar are here for very obvious reasons if you’ve seen the show.
Zog spends most of the first season trying to find the tools necessary to revive Dagmar
who had been turned to stone. Zog truly loved Dagmar and he’s not to blame for this, because
even though he did remarry while Dagmar was stone this was more of a political thing than anything.
The real reason they’re down here is that Dagmar is the most toxic person probably in existence.
Not only did she only marry Zog and birth Bean to fulfill a prophecy at her home,
but she tried to kill Zog only for her plan to backfire. It seems she never truly loved
Zog and only used him for political reasons. Dagmar also shows very little care for Bean
outside of her use in the prophecy and doesn’t care for the kingdom either. Sure, Zog’s not
the most attentive husband from what we’ve seen but even he didn’t deserve what she did.
But, as always, we have a few extra medals to hand out to these relationships.
Earning our Darwin Medal for the dumbest relationship goes to Lana Kane and Robert
because the relationship is mostly a ploy that Lana doesn’t want to be in from what we can tell.
Coincidentally, Lana Kane and Robert also gain the Greed Medal, This is because from what we can tell
Lana is just married to Robert for his money so she can provide for her and Archer’s daughter.
Our Wrath Medal goes to Peter and Lois who are physically
and emotionally abusive to each other in quite a few episodes.
Earning our Gluttony Medal is Bob and Linda, truth be told this is mostly
because a lot of the stuff they do revolves around the restaurant and therefore food.
The Envy Medal goes to our good friends Frank and Sue, mostly because Frank gets
jealous of Sue on a few different occasions, although not very often.
Earning the Pride Medal is PC and Judah who pride their
relationship enough to have both a regular and “industry” wedding.
But let us know in the comment section if you agree with our ranking.
And tell us what we should cover next. Remember to hit that notification bell
and binge more of our videos. But most importantly, stay wicked.