We’re going to explore that, in this video
so, stay tuned.
Hi, I'm Rebecca Zung.
I am an attorney, a narcissist negotiation expert and
on this channel, and in these videos,
I teach you how to shift the dynamic,
so that you can become powerful and
actually smack down narcissists and
feel like you are the most powerful person in any room.
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All right, so let's talk about whether a narcissist
misses you or feels regret after you leave.
This is the interesting sort of thing, because
you leave a narcissist, you're done with the relationship and
you're on the other side of it
You finally got away and you’re left wondering,
What are they thinking?
I mean, if you really want to know more about
what a narcissist is feeling when
they realize that life totally sucks without you.
by the way, I have a whole video on that.
You can definitely check out my video on that topic,
but you have to really understand that
a narcissist’s personality is governed primarily
by like everything is filtered through themselves.
They’ really like two-year olds stuck in an adult body,
they haven't like evolved,
somehow they got stuck there like “Arrested Development” and
they can't see beyond themselves and
so it's scarcity mentality to the extreme,
they don't really have a sense of self and
so they can only kind of see themselves,
they don't really miss you necessarily as a person,
they miss the idea of you,
they miss what you did for them,
they miss the state of you being around them,
they don't necessarily miss you as a person and
they certainly aren’t sorry for what they did necessarily,
they don't have the capacity, or the ability
to feel like genuine regret, genuine shame or feeling of sorrow
for what they may have done to you,
like really being sorry.
They just don't have that feeling of remorse,
like, if they might have cheated on you
or if they might have been hurtful to you in some way,
they don't go “Wow, I really damaged them,
I really am sorry for hurting them,
or the pain that I may have caused that other person”.
They just don't have the ability to feel that,
they may regret the fact that they don't have you anymore,
that you don't exist in their world,
but it's more like because they don't have you,
but not because of what they did to you.
So, they lost their narcissistic supply,
so, it's really from their own filter, from their own self,
so no, they can't truly miss you in the sense
that you want them to miss you
or as you and I may want to understand that term,
they certainly don't feel the same maybe guilt
that you and I might feel,
they just don't have that same sort of feeling of guilt, hurt or pain,
it's really not insofar as because
they can only feel it within themselves,
it's not what they can feel necessarily
as far as on your side of the equation,
it's only on their side of the equation.
Just remember that they only can feel their own pain,
the way I look at it,
is almost like as if a person is starving and
they're just looking for food and
they just can only think about their own starvation and
they can't think about anybody else's starvation
or anybody else needing food
or it's like if you have a really horrible toothache,
all they can think about is their own pain at that moment,
they can't think about anybody else's pain.
It really is scarcity mentality to the extreme,
that's kind of how they are
I mean, that's why they don't want to give anybody anything,
even the smallest little things,
they just don't want to give up and
so when that other person is gone,
it's really more like they think of you
as a possession and so they miss the possession
but they don't miss you as the person.
It's like they missed the jars of cans of something
that's lined up on the shelf,
but they don't miss you as the person,
they miss the possession,
they miss the thing being in their lives,
they miss what you could do for them,
they certainly miss what you were doing for them,
but they don't miss you necessarily as the person and
so understanding that, I
think should certainly help you because
they certainly don't feel regret,
they certainly don't feel that guilt,
they certainly don't feel sorry for what they’ve done to you.
I think that's really helpful,
especially in negotiations as well,
I mean, a lot of times people in negotiations,
what I've seen, especially empaths out there, they think
“Oh, I don't want to hurt them”,
“I'll give this up”, “If I do this, if I give this
they’ll see how good I'm being,
they’ll see that I'm being fair”.
They don't care about that,
they'll just take it, just take it and
then they’ll be like, whatever and
they'll just keep moving on from there.
They don't go “Oh, they already gave me this piece,
so I'll give them this piece now”
No. They just take that and that's it,
so that now you've already given up something and
that's that, so you don't want to do that in a negotiation,
they don't feel any sense of regret, or shame, or guilt,
or anything like that.
So, that's just to move on.
If you haven't gotten my free “Crush my negotiation” worksheet,
you can do that now,
brand-new, I just updated it, by the way,
at winmynegotiation.com.
15 pages, totally free, an e-book, grab that
join my free private Facebook group,
“Narcissist Negotiators with Rebecca Zung”.
I would love to have you in there,
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If you like this video, give it a like, give it a share,
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I'm Rebecca Zung.
I'm so happy you're here,
I'm so thrilled to have you as part of my community.
I'm here to support you. We are rock stars.
We are supporting each other,
we are showing up for each other,
we are Narcslayers!
Thank you so much for stopping by.
I will see you in the next video!