Hellooo, everybody!
You already know I love romance. I'm a romance writer and reader.
I just wanna see love blossom. Is that so wrong? But just because I love the genre,
doesn't mean I love every single story within it. And that's what we're talkin'
about today. In the past, I have told you the worst romance tropes that I've found and wow,
how they evolved over time! It's a new era and a new day to talk about brand new shitty romance
tropes. I will forewarn you some of these tropes are sexual in nature. So if that's not your thing,
scoot outta here. This ain't for you. But overall, these tropes are widely seen in the romance genre,
and I hate every single one of them. I am doing my best to not overlap any of the tropes from my
previous romance videos, though I will admit they still suck. This is all new and not even remotely
improved. Please stop writing this crap. Which trope on this list is your least favorite? Comment
below. And if you'd like any of them, just leave. Your family must be so ashamed. Let's dive in.
(The sound of a pen scratching. LOGO.)
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Don't forget to subscribe to my channel. I post new videos on Wednesdays, and if you wanna be
alerted as SOON as I upload, ring that bell. Shut Up and Write the Book is available for preorder
right now. It is available in these formats currently, and if you preorder the eBook you will
be getting it for 50% off. On top of that everyone who preorders is eligible to receive a free
digital workbook. All you have to do is submit your proof of preorder to this email address,
and bam, you've got yourself a workbook just as a thank you for your support. Now I am breaking
down the ten romance tropes that truly fucked me up, and not in a good way. Brace yourself.
Number One (1): The brother of the ex. Guess we're keeping it in the family, just the way the
Alabamians like it. I can't be the only one who thinks it's weird to date someone closely related
to someone you've already been with. I actually know people who've done this in real life,
and honestly, it's fucking gross. You get to attend every family function with the looming
horror that you know exactly how the inside of your brother-in-law's mouth tastes. You get to sit
across the table from your sister-in-law and think to yourself, “I've been inside you.” It's weird,
I'm sorry. I’m not actually sorry. I don't like running into my exes, let alone seeing
them at every family event. And yet there is an entire romance sub-genre devoted to dating
the brother of your ex-boyfriend, specifically. Why? Are you just going down the family line,
hoppin’ from dick to dick until you finally get your happy ending? Every man in that family knows
what you look like naked. Do you really want that? Apparently so because these books exist
in droves. But that doesn't mean I have to understand the twisted minds of hill people.
Number Two (2): The infantilized female love interest. She's a grown woman,
but she's four foot eight. She's very angry, but that's okay because she's so cute when she's mad.
Have you seen her hands? They're the size of a baby's! Tell me you’re a pedophile without
telling me you're a pedophile. Listen, I am aware that some women are tiny. I have an aunt and a
cousin who are both four foot nine. But you think that being below five feet was the norm given how
many diminutives there are in fiction. And who's usually writing these women? You guessed it,
grown ass men. And sometimes grown ass women. Why are you infantilizing your own gender? Oh,
internalized misogyny, how could I forget? I'm not saying your leading lady can't be short. Shorties
are awesome. Hell, Leila is five foot three, and she's a badass. It's just alarming how often I
pick up a book, and the female love interest is the same size as a prepubescent child. It's just
concerning that making her teeny-tiny is such a fierce priority, as if making her an average
height or worse, tall, is so detrimental to our character. Plot twist, the average woman in the
US is five foot four. If that intimidates you, I've got nothing for you. That's just weird.
Speaking of pedophiles, Number Three (3): Graphic teen sex. Jesus Christ! I am a thirty-five year
old woman. I do not need to read about two children having sex. “But Jennaaa,
they’re not children. They're sixteen years old.” They’re practically fetuses. I'm not
saying you can't write a teen sex scene, we all know teens are horny as hell. But
does it have to be graphic? Do you need to describe all the positions and parts? You’re
making me uncomfortable. And honestly teens probably aren't all that good at doing the do,
so why do you wanna be graphic anyway? No one is interested in hearing about Billy six pumps
of coital mediocrity. Best thirty seconds of her life, I'm sure. Save the graphic
stuff for adults who know what they're doing. Let the teenagers screw in private, please.
Number Four (4): I love you, because the plot says so. The characters get together
because they're supposed to. Not because they have any chemistry. Not because they share
any moments of bonding or intimacy. Certainly not because they have any deep conversations,
who even talks anymore? Cliff and I haven't spoken in years. This issue is less of
a trope and more so just bad writing. The problem is it's become increasingly
prevalent over the years. A lot of writers are so focused on crafting saucy sex scenes,
they forget that sex isn't a requirement of the romance genre. You know, what is a
requirement? Romance! It's not romantic to shove two characters together just for the sake of the
plot. You have to at least try to build moments of chemistry. And if you don't know how to do that,
for God's sake, learn! Because your book sucks and doesn't bring any heart flutters. Fix that.
Number Five (5): They came as one. Literally. We're talking about synchronized orgasms.
I'm not saying it's impossible. It's definitely doable. However,
timing your orgasms to happen concurrently takes a lot of practice and a deep understanding of your
partner's wants and needs. It's not something that magically happens overnight. And therein
lies the problem. I read a lot of books where the characters come at the same time,
the first time they have sex together. Even worse, I've read books where they come at the
same time and they were virgins. This is literally the first time they've had sex,
period. Are you serious? I'm not against writing synchronized splooge, but can at least be between
characters who've had sex together. And honestly, it's not unsexy to write about your characters
coming at different times. If anything, you get to write two orgasms instead of one. Who doesn't
love that? There's only so much I can pretend to believe. Might as well give your characters wings
and have them fly off into the sky while fucking. Oh wait, someone's written that too. Jesus Christ.
Number Six (6): I'm never gonna tell them how I feel, but I'm gonna get real mad when they
date someone else. Humph! I understand that it's hard to express romantic attraction, rejection is
brutal. And I can understand resisting for a few chapters, that's just good pacing and suspense.
But when we go hundreds of pages, or even multiple books, and they still haven't expressed their
feelings…honey, you don't deserve ‘em! If you're not willing to fight for them, they can certainly
do better than you. And you can't convince me to root for this character because they have
no backbone, which is incredibly unattractive. And tell me why every single time they finally
reveal their feelings, when the other character is happily involved with someone else. Bitch, you
are toxic! As Kelly Clarkson wisely said, “You had your chance, you blew it.” Listen, relationships
take courage, humility, and vulnerability. And all these things are required in a love confession.
If you can't wrangle up a spine, you're probably not ready for a relationship anyway.
Number Seven (7): We can't be together, for reasons. I am the biggest fan of forbidden love.
I am obsessed with stories about characters who can't be together because of some outside force.
But there NEEDS to be an outside force, obviously! Or is it obvious? Because I've read a lot of books
where the characters declare that they can't be together, because they said so. I am literally
rooting for the forbidden aspect, but you gotta give me a reason. What is the reason? It can't
just be, “I'm no good for you.” Because no fucking shit! None of us are good for anyone. We are all
garbage people running this landfill we call Earth. Just give me an actual reason for their
separation. So I can mourn, and pine, and long for their reunion. But if you give me nothing,
you’re gettin’ nothing in return. I don’t have time for a weak-ass romance, bitch.
Number Eight (8): The jackrabbiting sex god. This is usually a male character paired with a female
character, and we’ve been told throughout the entire book that he’s an absolute beast in the
sheets. And then the time comes and it’s a whole lotta this. Honestly, this doesn't make me hate
the story, it just makes me feel really bad for the author. If they’re a man, then holy shit,
leave vaginas alone, you’re destroying them. If they’re a woman, then I just wanna
wrap them up in a blanket and hold them gently, it’s gonna be okay, one day you will find someone
who treats you as more than a sock. The problem with sex scenes is they can be super revealing,
so if you’re gonna write them, make sure they don’t reveal all of your baggage. If you write
a jackhammer session, people are just gonna feel sorry for you, and probably your partners.
Number Nine (9): Terrible language for private parts. Moist hole, wet folds, velvet covered
steel, big bouncing boobies, meat wand, gobs of pearly goo. These are all actual phrases I’ve
seen written in books. They’re also the reason I’m in therapy. I understand that pee-pees and
tatas might be hard to write about, but here’s a solution. Keep it simple, stupid. Call it a dick,
call them breasts. It’s that easy. Stop trying to reinvent the wheel, or I guess, rebrand the balls.
You’re just making your intimate scenes unbearable to read. I’ll send you the bill for my Lexapro.
And Number Ten (10): Incest. I never thought I’d see the day where this was on my list,
but writers have gotten really weird. I’ve got no problem with including incest in your
story as a general facet of the world or society. Pretty much anything can be written in fiction,
it’s the way it’s portrayed that matters. It’s one thing to write about incest,
it’s happened in the world for centuries. It’s another thing entirely to romanticize it.
[Gagging noise]
That’s exactly what happens when the main ship of a literal romance novel
is incestuous. Romance novels, romanticize. See how that works? I’ve seen romance novels
where a father and daughter start hookin’ up, I’ve seen it where cousins are getting married,
I’ve even seen twins being shipped. I’m not talking about the Lannisters,
I’m not sure anyone was shipping them. But are you fucking kidding me? What about this
is appealing. Their children are gonna be fucked up. And before anyone accuses me of coming for
House of the Dragon, first of all, I haven't seen it so I don't have an opinion. And second of all,
it's irrelevant because it's not a romance, calm down. I don't think I need to elaborate
on this point. Anyone who's arguing in favor of romantic incest honestly can't be helped
and it's not my problem. I just wanna read romances about people who aren't related to
one another. It's a low bar but somehow people are limboing right under it. The world's trash.
So that’s all I got for you today. A huge thank you to GetCovers for sponsoring today's video.
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Don't forget to subscribe to my channel. I post new videos on Wednesdays, and if you wanna be
alerted as SOON as I upload, ring that bell. Shut Up and Write the Book is available for
preorder right now, and if you submit your proof of preorder to this email address,
you will receive a free digital workbook as a thank you for your support. I have the info
listed below, And be sure to follow me on social media. I'm on Instagram, Tiktock,
BookBub and Facebook. And of course you can tweet me @JennaMoreci! Bye!
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