[Music]
every corn teen ever day one of
quarantine we've been relaxing and
watching movies so no good I'm excited
to spend more quality time ago I'm too
big
did you smart no I started
that's disgusting are you gonna change
no quarantine life it's gross
is that too much yeah sorry
I want a divorce what we're not even
married I'm leaving where are you going
to the kitchen do you even care that I'm
leaving oh did you get them yeah I'm
recording this from my closet
[Music]
[Applause]
who needs toilet paper when you got a
perfectly good thumb just do it
just say it I know you can do it I'm not
even gonna tell anybody if you do just
say Papa I love you please I mean this
every forever alone ever sweet
I'm gonna use these next few weeks to
perfect my Australian accent why some
lump Rob a lumpy pleat parlors or us a
couple of dumb behrouz Rob a double lose
top pose or asset cover what is this a
nice 40 it's tougher on me I've got a
lil Nando
Culpeper bones nikki Daniels sneaker Oh
silent pose data Cameron Diaz tot fish
three fish for three oh Sh Brisby Oh as
I thought what are they
[Music]
Wow I think I finally perfected it okay
we need to ration food we all get one
almond
congratulations you have successfully
watched everything on Netflix oh okay
because you were the first to do so you
have been dubbed the king of Netflix
sick as king it is your right to create
your very own Netflix show yeah anything
you wanted we have to make it the world
is yours you are a big TV exec now tell
us your idea um okay yes I do have
something um okay so it's like stranger
things but they've all got really big
butts whenever you're ready
stranger things but with big butts
[Music]
stranger things with big butts
stranger things with big stranger things
with big butts are you this could be
huge Netflix and so good the butts big
butts equals big bucks let's get it Dan
I already practice social distancing
hello hi there uh Karen this is Harry
calling from your credit card
institution uh-huh yeah we're noticing
some strange activity on one of your
accounts and we're gonna need your
credit card information and social
security number to rectify the situation
no I'm sorry I'm a little too smart to
fall for a credit card scam Harry that
dang it you got me well have a nice day
wait joining up why I don't know do on
top or something well what would you
want to talk about I don't care just
kind of nice to talk to someone please
well you know I think I could chat if
you gave me your social security number
Oh fine but you better be interesting
well I steal identities for a living so
I mean I think I'm pretty interesting so
how much toilet paper do you have wash
your hands
[Music]
I wish I knew
so bored I miss you so much right now
baby
always was it been just like whole you
hey do you wanna maybe like it's sexy
oh my god Cody yup like cyber bag yeah I
mean like I don't know it's like if you
want to I don't know
please for me for Cody well I mean
normally I'd say no but given the
circumstances and if you do look really
hot right now wait 300 awesome let's do
this
so hang out with me I'm kind of busy
get out dude no wait shine day babe do
stuff to each other I'll be like I don't
know please for me sir Molly okay I
guess given the circumstances I'm not
losing my mind what's that smell another
day that mother must spend it home with
me providing me with walks treats and
the all-powerful belly rub
the virus is working do I feel bad for
what I've created
no I feel happy because mother is home I
should have set this in motion years ago
well I had to fight an old lady but I
got this can of beans who are you we're
stuck in the apartment for the next
month maybe this is the perfect
opportunity to just relax and take a
break the only break you're gonna get is
your pose when I break your bones
all right now get back to a seasoned
introvert I have prepared for this
moment all my life well I think we have
found our Mercutio which makes you
Tibbles
oh don't sulk don't sulk Thibault is
Prince of cats
all right games I can play by myself
Marco Polo
wait no hide-and-seek wait no hey man
just got back from the grocery store
what
scorn old bag of rice ha ha ha suckers
then you see this in the back so oh god
this tastes disgusting goodbye this
don't go outside
she's like James Bond oh let's do it to
Kylie Jenner you look at the sexy fish
fruit cocktail
Oh what have you been doing oh you're
like burning me I look like Mario things
we wouldn't be Xbox Live is down what do
I do
this has been so hard I mean I've
already read all of my books I've
rearranged my apartment twice and I've
done sixty thousand push-ups I'm so
bored I'm going crazy yep me too
super bored oh thank god animal
Crossing's out hey you guys last day of
quarantine how'd you do great I learned
how to play guitar oh that's awesome
um I myself learned a little bit of
Spanish or should I say Apprendi algo de
español Courtney what did you do um I
spent most of my time on Tech Talk oh
that's when I finally learned the
renegade that's cool yeah it's really
cool that you did that
oh cool that yeah that's cool it's
really cool six feet up their stance
I'm gonna spend the quarantine getting
into a new genre of literature I got
into some really weird porn oh hey maybe
now I can finally start Big Bang Theory
[Music]
now you're saying yes good again like I
trained you the American government knew
about it in January did nothing I am so
glad you guys are all able to make it
for my birthday dinner I mean I know
we're not speaking out but the fact that
you guys risked it all to come here and
see me just means the world best
birthday ever you guys are my best
friend once happy birthday to me happy
birthday to me
[Music]
okay this is the snack girl scene take
one mm sorry Lighting's bad we're trying
something action and if you thought a
global pandemic was gonna slow me down
think again you sick son of a [ __ ]
and if you thought a global pandemic was
gonna slow me down think again mother
but I finally learned they're running it
Dan why can't I do it I just learned
this okay you guys look really wait I
literally spent the last half hour
learning this
[Music]
come on guys don't leave
[Music]
cool let's see how that looks I'm so
glad you guys were able to make it here
for my birthday dinner
birth why can't I say birthday dinner
okay thank you guys so much for watching
this video we shot it during our
quarantine all in our separate houses
with our phones cuz that's all we have
and I hope you guys enjoyed it I hope
you guys are staying safe if you got
plenty of time and you're in your
quarantine check out the video that we
put right there we picked it just for
you there's a small perch down there if
you looking for something comfy in the
middle of your quarantine and you got
plenty of time right now so might as
well just subscribe if you haven't yet
so stay safe and wash your hands