- Falling in love can feel a whole lot like standing
on a bridge, overlooking water ready to jump.
Your palms are sweaty.
Your stomach is nuts.
Your heart is racing and you're thinking of yourself,
"If this job doesn't go well,
"this is gonna be painful, right."
And yet often what screws relationships up,
more than anything else early in the beginning
is where one of the people in a great relationship,
grabs the ledge and doesn't let themselves fully jump,
doesn't let themselves fall in.
And so they're holding back.
And so because they hold back,
the other person holds back.
And then there's a big gap between both people.
It's the fear of actually getting hurt
that holds people back from falling in love
in the first place.
But if you know that you've got a partner,
that's standing on that ledge with you.
If they're looking at you saying,
"I know that this is scary, but let's jump together."
If you know that your partner is falling in love with you,
then it can be a whole lot easier to let go of the ledge,
open your heart and dive into that relationship with love.
So, today I'm gonna share with you five surefire signs
that your man is falling in love with you.
Check it out.
(upbeat music)
Hey there,
my name is Mat Boggs
and I'm the founder and executive director
of the Brave Thinking Institute,
where our mission is empowering people
to create and live the life they love
and that includes your love life.
So, if you like this video,
I encourage you to click that Subscribe button
and click the little bell,
because every week we bring you videos
to empower you in your love life.
And today we're talking about five surefire signs
that your man loves you.
So, let's dive in.
Number one is grand gestures.
You see when your man is falling in love with you,
his heart is bursting with emotion for you.
His heart is just swelled
with this intensity of feeling for you.
He can't get you out of his mind.
He's like, "I love this woman."
This is why movies will say,
the man will want to shout it from the rooftops,
"I love this woman," right?
And so that feeling he tries to express
and he'll often express it through these grand gestures,
where he'll will wanna purchase this beautiful gift for you
or take you on this beautiful trip or try to do something
that even closely matches the immensity
of the emotion that he has for you.
When I was first dating Irene,
it was our first Valentine's day that came up
and there was this part of me,
we lived long distance.
She was in Southern California
and I was a thousand miles north in Oregon.
And we had been dating long distance,
doing fun, kind of long distance dates,
movie nights together and other cool things.
But I knew if I wanted to really demonstrate how much I felt
for this woman, I was gonna have to do something big.
And so I set up this elaborate scheme
where I was gonna surprise Irene and take her to dinner,
this beautiful dinner.
And I would need her to be ready for that dinner,
without actually knowing that I was gonna take her out
for a romantic Valentine's Day dinner.
So, how do you accomplish that?
How do you say,
how do I get her ready without her knowing
that I'm actually taking her out?
So I told her, I said,
"Look, I would love to have a date night with you
"where you and I both dress up as if we're going out.
"And we all order some food for you or some food for me,
"we'll have this beautiful, elegant dinner at home.
"We'll both be dressed up, but we just won't be together."
And so she said, okay
and all day I was telling her I've got meetings.
So, I can't really talk to you throughout the day,
I'll just meet you tonight when we do our dinner.
And she was like, okay, cause I was getting on a plane.
So, I knew I couldn't call her as I'm traveling
and be on this plane.
So evening comes,
I get on a plane to fly down to Southern California,
rent a car, drive over to her house.
I'm calling her out in front of her house saying,
"All right, are you ready for our date night?"
And she was like, "Yes."
And I said, "Are you ready?
"Are you all dressed up?"
And she goes, "Yes,"
your hair done everything?
She goes, "Yes."
I said, "Great thank you so much.
"I'm so glad we're gonna have a great time."
And she goes, "Are you dressed up?"
I said, "Of course."
And I ring the doorbell,
she was like, "Hold on somebody's at my door."
And her dad came to the door.
Her dad knew I was coming to take her to dinner
and he lets me in.
And I walked back to the back bedroom,
now critical moment.
If she had been the woman who just gave me lip service,
like, "Yeah, yeah I'm all dressed up,
"but she's still in her sweats."
This would have totally backfired on me and on her.
But luckily that's not who Irene is,
Irene is a woman of integrity.
She does what she says she's gonna do.
So, I walk into this back bedroom,
where she's got her laptop up,
she's ready for our date night and she's looking amazing.
Her hair is done,
makeup and she's got this beautiful red dress on.
And I knock on the door.
I said, "Hey babe."
And she's on the phone and she turns and she sees me,
all decked out in my suit
and she just burst into tears.
And she's like,
"Oh my gosh, I can't believe you're here, yay."
She gives me this big hug
and we have this epic Valentine's Day.
And the whole reason that it was this epic Valentine's Day
was because that was the best thing I knew,
how to express the immensity of the love
that I was feeling for this woman.
So, when your man attempts to do big grand gestures,
whether they work out or whether they don't is irrelevant,
that's not the point.
The point is he's trying to do something
that matches how large of a feeling of love
that he has for you.
Number two is your man prioritizes girlfriend time,
much to his friends Chagrin often.
This is classic, right?
Buddy's upset,
because their friend that used to prioritize bro time
and the friends would always get
the best of their friends time,
prime time, weekend time, all of that.
Now, their friends are trying to scrounge for time
with their buddy, because guess what their buddy's doing?
Their buddy is prioritizing time with his girlfriend.
Why?
Because he's falling in love with his girlfriend.
He wants to be with his girlfriend,
more than he wants to be with anybody else.
And at the end of the day where you spend your time,
reflects your values,
it reflects your priorities,
where you spend your time reflects what you think
is most important in your life.
So, you'll notice that your man,
will wanna create traditions with you every week
at that time, you guys are doing something together.
Whether it's an activity, a show you watch, a date night,
something like that.
There's a great movie called, "I Love You, Man"
with Jason Siegel and Paul Rudd.
And Paul Rudd is this man
who's totally in love with his fiance.
He's gonna get married to Zooey in a little while.
And he meets his new buddy, Jason Siegel.
And Jason's like,
"Hey man, let's go to the Rush Concert this weekend."
And Paul's like, "Sorry, bro.
"Zooey and I have a HBO.
"On Sunday night we watch HBO."
And he's like,
"You're gonna sit at home and watch cable
"with your girlfriend instead of seeing Rush?"
He was like, "Dude, this is not just cable, okay?
"It's HBO.
"Have you seen HBO, how good HBO is?"
And at the end of the day,
he's putting it on HBO.
But the truth of the matter is he wants to be with Zooey
and that a little HBO evening session
is his time to hang out with his girlfriend.
So, the man that loves you
is prioritizing his girlfriend time.
Now it doesn't mean that a man never hangs out
with his friends, doesn't have balance,
doesn't have his own hobbies,
cancels on his friends unnecessarily.
No, it's none of that.
But the man that loves you
is absolutely prioritizing his girlfriend time.
Number three is the man that loves you,
shows extra compassion and understanding.
When you love someone,
there's this thing called rose colored glasses, right?
Where the person you're with, they can do no wrong.
You feel this extra bond with them.
And so you're naturally more inclined to lend understanding,
to lend compassion, to lend forgiveness,
to have a bit more patience with that person,
because you have such an affinity for them.
I remember watching my oldest brother, John
and as he was dating certain girls growing up,
John was always the kind of guy,
where his just natural emo growing up as a young man
was argumentative.
He always had to prove his point
and he always had to be right.
And that was a case,
not just with the girlfriends,
but with all of us.
And so I can remember him meeting his current wife
and when they were dating,
they were hanging out
and I can remember hanging out with them.
And there was one point where they disagreed with each other
and they kind of got in this debate.
And for the first time in my life,
I saw my brother back down and say,
"Oh, you know what?
"Yeah, I think you've got a really good point.
"I can see your side of this."
That just wasn't his nature.
That just wasn't his pattern.
And I remember thinking,
"Oh my God, he loves this woman."
He's gonna marry this woman.
I've never seen him do that before.
And sure enough, he did.
And they'd been together over 25 years.
And it was just a great demonstration that love,
that understanding, that compassion
and that patience is a great demonstration
of the fact that he's got these intense feelings
of love for you.
Number four and I love this concept
is that the man who is falling in love with you,
wants you want his team.
And what that means
is he doesn't see you as separate entities,
but you're a unit.
And so he'll refer to you as we
and he'll consider the two of you doing things.
When he's thinking about his future plans,
he's taking you into consideration because you're a team
and because he wants you on his team,
he also doesn't want you on anybody else's team.
What that means
is that he doesn't want you dating somebody else.
He doesn't want you going out with anybody else,
potentially letting somebody else get the jump
and saying, "Hey, commit to them instead of with me."
So, he's gonna want to make sure
that the two of you are exclusive
and that exclusive unit becomes a beautiful team
with which you're moving forward and living life together.
Number five is he shares traditions
that deeply matter to him with you.
The things that matter to us,
the things that we deem as sacred,
we wanna share those with the people that matter most to us,
specifically the partner that you're falling in love with.
So, it might be a holiday tradition,
like Thanksgiving or Christmas.
It might be a faith service,
like he wants to go to church with you
or wants you to come to Easter with him
or some sort of faith celebration
that really matters to him.
I can remember a gentleman that I know,
didn't want to spend the night with women,
that he would just date.
For him sleeping in the same bed was a very sacred,
special, unique thing.
And so the girl that he was dating,
it was a really big deal to him
when he finally fell in love,
the thing that he wanted to share,
wasn't even having sex yet,
it was just sharing a bed together
and snuggling and sleeping at night.
Take notice of things
that may not necessarily be sacred to you,
but you can identify it's sacred to him.
Him sharing football time with you
and teaching you about his favorite team
or the two of you rooting for his favorite team together
or taking you to his favorite fishing place,
the place he only goes by himself.
And he wants to share that with you,
because that's a beautiful sign that this man
is sharing that with you because he loves you
and he wants to bring you into that very special,
sacred part of his life.
So, my question for you is what signs do you exhibit
when you are falling in love with a man,
when you're on that ledge and you've jumped and you're like,
"I'm going into this relationship open-hearted,
"I can feel my love bursting for this man."
What are the signs that you demonstrate?
Go ahead and post those in the comment section below.
I appreciate you.
Thanks for watching and I'll see you soon.
(upbeat music)