Mat Boggs: Hey.
This is Mat Boggs, and, today, I'm going to answer a question that was submitted by a
viewer from a previous video, and this question was submitted by Sabrina, and Sabrina asks,
"Hey, Mat.
Can you please explain how men feel when they are in love?
Lots of love.
Sabrina."
Sabrina, that's a great question, and we're going to dive deep into that today, and I'm
going to share with you seven experiences that men have when we're in love, and this
comes from a research done by Dr. Helen Fisher.
Now, Dr. Helen Fisher is an anthropological biologist, or I think she goes by biological
anthropologist or a ... How does it go, Alex?
Okay.
Yes, biological anthropologist.
Okay.
The bottom line is she's smart.
She knows what she's talking about, done a ton of research and wrote a book called Why
We Love, where she breaks down your experience and my experience is when we fall in love.
For both of us, we get this rush of neuro chemicals that flood our brain, chemicals
like dopamine, norepinephrine, serotonin that put us in this euphoric state of being, and
so I'm going to pull out seven experiences from this book that she talks about that men
have when they're in love with you and what it's like for us.
Number one is our thoughts are magnetized to you.
The vast majority of men report feeling like you dominate his thinking, right?
His mind just automatically magnetizes to you while he's doing his work.
A lot of men report that 80% of their day is actually consumed with thoughts of the
woman that he loves.
Number two, he feels a surge of energy.
When he's in love with you, he feels this energetic expansion, this sense of aliveness.
It's almost like all of life becomes a little bit brighter, a little bit more vivid, a little
bit more technicolor, if you will, and this sense of aliveness and this sense of feeling
amazing, this euphoric feeling is connected to you.
It makes sense, too, because, just like the movie Limitless where the guy took the pill
that unlocked and unleashed his brain, when we're in love we get this rush of dopamine,
this rush of serotonin, and norepinephrine, and these chemicals heighten our awareness
literally of life, so life does become more vivid, more technicolor, more spectacular
with you in it.
Number three is he analyzes your actions.
The vast majority of men report that, when they're intensely attracted to a woman, they
find themselves analyzing her moves, her actions, her texts to find out does she reciprocate
the same feeling he has for her.
If you do this, you're not alone.
It's not just you analyzing his actions.
When he's totally into you, he's wondering, "What did she mean by this text?" or, "Why
did she say that?"
or, "Does she like me the same way that I like her?"
Number four is that he prioritizes you.
The vast majority of men report that they actually are strategic about keeping their
calendars open just in case the woman that he loves is available to hang out with him.
Oh, hand on here.
Oh, nice.
Hey, man, what's going on?
Yeah, golf on Saturday?
I need to hear back from Irene.
I don't know she's up to, man.
I want to hang out with her, so Sunday afternoon?
Maybe.
I need to keep some space open.
Monday?
Now, if you take this concept a little bit deeper, there are actually feminine qualities
and feminine actions that you can implement to activate his masculine attraction for you.
If you want to go deeper into that, I'm going to post a resource in the video here.
It's a link to a E-book called The 5 Feminine Qualities That High Value Men Find Irresistible,
and I'm also going to link it up in the description below.
Go ahead and check that out.
You can download it.
It's my gift to you, and it will serve you in understanding what those actions are and
how to ignite his attraction in that way.
Number five is his emotions are tied to your emotions.
In other words, when you're happy, he is happy.
If you're not feeling good, if you're feeling sad or you're feeling frustrated or you're
feeling angry, his emotions get pulled down as well.
In interviewing hundreds of America's greatest marriages around the country, I would constantly
hear men who've been married 50, 60, 70 years put it this way.
"Hey, look, if mama's happy, everybody's happy.
If mama ain't happy, nobody's happy."
Number six is that he daydreams about having sex with you.
Now, here's what's interesting.
73% of men report daydreaming about having sex with the woman that he is in love with.
What's interesting is I don't know why it's not 100% of men.
Doesn't it seem a little low that it's only 73%?
Maybe the other ones don't want to admit it, but a huge majority of men daydream about
having sex with you, and this is a good thing, because what separates friendship from romantic
passion is that sexual attraction, and so by the time he ends up sleeping with you,
just know that he will have fantasized about you in his mind a thousand times before the
actual event occurs because you are sexy, you are beautiful, and he finds you ultra
attractive.
Number seven, he is willing to fight for you.
Men report that when they are in love with a woman, they're going to climb the highest
mountain, they're going to swim across the sea.
He will move from where he lives to be with you, to pursue that relationship.
He will move heaven and earth to be with you when he's in love with you, and he is willing
to face difficult situations.
He's willing to fight for the relationship if the relationship feels like it's gotten
off track, which brings me back to the point that it's really hard to screw up the right
thing, meaning, you can have fights, you can have bumps in the roads.
You don't have to feel like you're walking on eggshells when it's the right guy, knowing
that you can be yourself.
He's going to be his self.
You're going to pour love into one another and, if a relationship gets off track or feels
a bump because of a miscommunication or misunderstanding, that when you're in love with each other,
you're going to fight for one another and you're going to fight that relationship because
it matters to you.
There you have it, seven experiences men have when they are totally in love with you, but
there's an important nuance to this, and that is that nature is interesting.
Nature only gives us these feel-good rush of chemical cocktails bathing our brain for
about 18 months.
We get 18 months of free chemicals, if you will, on average, generating this experience
and then, after 18 months, those chemicals start to wane.
Those chemicals start to go down if you aren't proactive about generating them.
You and I have experienced this, and it's called the honeymoon phase, where you're just
naturally all about the person, but if you want to be in a long term relationship, how
do you ignite those chemicals and how do you keep the love alive?
In an upcoming video, I'm going to share with you three ways that you can actually keep
the love alive and keep that intense passion in your relationship.
Now, what I would love to hear from you is what's your experience when you're in love?
Go ahead and post that in the comment section below.
I love checking out your comments.
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Thanks so much for watching.
I'll see you soon.