♫ Whatever happened to
♫ Predictability
♫ We live in San Francisco
♫ And we're all family, yeah ♫
- I've never seen it.
I don't know what it is.
- The kid would be like, "You got it dude."
And that's why I didn't watch it.
- So this is the middle child, right?
Stephanie? (scoffs)
Classic middle child, trying to drive the car. Am I right?
- This will not end well.
- (laughs) What?
- Right into the kitchen.
- (laughs) Oh.
- What kind of a household is this that
the youngest child is the first one to come in
after a car has just come in through the kitchen?
- Uncle Jesse wants to get laid (laughs).
- You know what I love when a sexy girl comes into my room?
A laugh track.
(laughing)
- Do people get nightmares from watching this show?
'Cause I think I might tonight.
- You don't want your family showing up in your sex dream.
- Now, is that the dead mom who's back,
or is that the prostitute?
- You need serious psychological evaluation.
- Oh, God.
No.
- John Stamos must have woken up every single day
of his life and just kissed the mirror
and been like, "Thank you."
- He's so attractive.
- I feel like he would have been my childhood crush
if it wasn't Arnold from Hey, Arnold.
- The babies are naked. Oh, weird (laughs).
- So this isn't a parody of anything?
This is really in the show?
Great hairstyles.
I feel like we should bring some of that back.
- It feels like a parody of itself.
Maybe that's because it was really influential
for the time and it was important?
I can respect that.
Or maybe it's just really, really bad.
We may never know.
- If I'd known that it was this crazy,
maybe I would have watched it.
♫ When you're with your friends
♫ And your family doing things
♫ Everywhere you look
♫ Everywhere you go ♫
- [Voiceover] That's all I-- I know these lyrics
are completely wrong but--
♫ Saxophone ♫