Whenever fans see a couple in Hollywood that's stayed together for a long time, the immediate
question is, "What's their secret?".
So naturally, because legendary actors Kurt Russel and Goldie Hawn have been together
for 38 years, everyone wants to know, "How the heck have they done it?".
Well, what if we told you that marriage wasn't the secret for this couple?
That's right; Goldie says she’ll never marry Kurt.
Why?
Let's just say that their kids were part of the reason.
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Believe it or not, there was in fact a time before Goldie and Kurt were together.
It was not Goldie's first rodeo with romance.
The actress had been married twice before, and even had two children from her second
marriage - which was when she birthed the forever stunning Kate Hudson, in case you
didn't know.
Was it maybe her previous failed marriages that led to Goldie being more of a commitment-phobe?
"When I think about my life and my marriages, they didn't end up all that great.
Vows are made.
Vows are broken.
Promises are made; promises are broken.
What does a piece of paper have to do with it for me?"
- The actress said about her decision not to marry Kurt.
What happened with her previous husbands that made her so cynical about marriage?
The actress and her first husband, Gus Trikonis, were married for 7 years.
Not much is known about their split, but what we do know is that Goldie only filed for divorce
AFTER she was already engaged to Bill Hudson, her second husband.
Goldie and Bill Hudson were married for 6 years, but it seems that it was not the white
picket fantasy she had been hoping for.
After getting divorced, Bill seemed to completely disappear from his kids' life.
Kate even went as far as to say that her father abandoned her.
Oliver, Kate's brother posted an old photo of himself, little Kate and their father on
Instagram and captioned it, "Happy abandonment day," which was just supposed to be "darkly
comedic."
Bill responded to the photo by stating that he no longer considers Kate and Oliver as
his children, and even went on to shame them for still using his last name.
He also blamed Goldie for having "poisoned" their children against him.
"They are no longer a part of my life.
Oliver's Instagram post was a malicious, vicious, premeditated attack.
He is dead to me now.
As is Kate.
I am mourning their loss even though they are still walking this earth."
Many have wondered why a father would abandon his own children.
There's no doubt that both Kate and Oliver have had to grapple with the trauma of their
father's rejection.
Kate has been able to process everything that has happened with her dad, and has confessed
to having healed all her wounds.
"We can sort of laugh at what the challenges that we faced together.
I actually feel like it was a blessing.
And no matter what [Bill] goes through, I am all forgiveness."
She said about her father.
So, with two failed marriages behind her, and one ex-husband that left her as a single
mother, can you really blame Goldie for wanting to steer clear from another wedding?
Thankfully, while her faith in the marriage system might have failed, the award-winning
actress had not given up on love.
"It's not about the marriage.
It's about the people and the relationship, and the will to stay together.
And that's a big one because if you want it, you can have it.
You've got to give things up … " Goldie shared.
The lovely Goldie Hawn met the charming Kurt Russel on the set of the 1984 film, Swing
Shift.
It was chemistry like no other, and the pair have been together ever since.
But they did not approach their relationship in the most conventional sense.
The pair, in fact, had an open relationship, which in general means that they're allowed
to see other people with permission from one another.
Lots of couples have different ways of approaching open relationships, so not all of them go
by the same rules.
Kurt stepped in as a father to Kate and Oliver and helped raise them as his own kids.The
couple also went on to have a child of their own together, Wyatt.
So along with his son from his first marriage, Boston, they all lived together as one big
happy family.
Goldie was of course, overjoyed to finally have found a wonderful father figure for her
children, and knew she had found the one.
Early on in their relationship, the couple actually discussed the idea of marriage during
a conversation with their children.
And guess what?
When the kids were asked if they wanted mommy and daddy to get married, the answer was a
firm "no!"
"For people like us, the marriage certificate wasn't going to create anything that otherwise
we wouldn't have," - Kurt said about their relationship.
Unfortunately, the couple's open-relationship status got a little complicated.
In 2000, Kurt was photographed leaving a massage parlor with a less-than-honorable reputation.
Photos soon appeared all over the tabloids and Goldie was devastated, furious and had
to attend to her crushed ego.
It wasn't the end of their relationship, but the actress was never able to totally forget
the incident.
For a while after that, the couple had a little trouble communicating.
When Goldie took a solo trip to India in 2004, she spent some time with her friend Imran
Khan; a former cricket player turned politician.
The ex-sportsman was alleged to have a reputation as a bit of a womanizer and a heavy partier.
Close friends said that when Kurt found out that his beloved partner was spotted with
Imran, he was suddenly in a foul mood, yelling at his co-stars on set and almost inconsolable.
Kurt even went to say that he didn't want to see Goldie.
"They were both acting out a little, and he was on a jealousy kick that hadn't really
shown itself.
They called an adult time-out to get some space so tempers could cool."
An insider revealed.
So for two weeks, the couple split.
They both lived in separate houses in order to cool off.
Goldie admitted to being really worried.
It was a painful time apart, and the pair took the time to consider their relationship
and what they really wanted from one another.
After what probably felt like the longest two weeks ever, Goldie and Kurt agreed that
they were both in it for the long run, and they weren't going to let anyone get in the
way of their love for one another.
Their children were a big part of that decision too.
They weren't about to tear up their family.
Soon, all was forgiven, and Goldie returned to the man she fell in love with.
Their bond became stronger after that turbulent split, and they knew nothing could break them
now.
"It's also about not losing yourself in each other.
Being together, two pillars holding up the house and the roof, and being different, not
having to agree on everything, learning how to deal with not agreeing."
They have been able to move forward, and no longer dwell on issues from the past.
They have also forgiven each other and themselves for any hurt that was done, while teaching
their kids the importance of forgiveness too.
And isn't that the beauty of a committed relationship?
They have been able to make their own rules work for themselves, proving that they don't
need a marriage certificate to hold them together.
The actress also confessed that she's not willing to spend a fortune on a wedding anyway
and would rather take the money and donate it to charity.
Knowing that some of Hollywood's elite have spent millions of dollars on their weddings,
donating that kind of money to a charity would be nothing short of saint-like.
"Basically, once you've done it once, once you've done it twice, you realize that marriage,
or the act of marrying, has nothing to do with the success," The actress stated
Through an elaborate and extravagant ceremony and reception that may not be in the cards
for these two, Hawn did show off a sparkly diamond ring Russell had given her, and announced
that they decided to take part in a very intimate and meaningful non-wedding ceremony and even
exchanged some vows as a celebration of their almost 40-year-long relationship.
Goldie has never shied away from admitting that it's not always easy.
She's said that their relationship takes constant work, and that sometimes Kurt can be a pain
in her backside.
But he brings her endless joy and happiness and she couldn't imagine her life with anyone
else by her side.
"The wake-up call every day is, 'Do I want to be with this man?Do I want to be in this
relationship?
Am I willing to give something?
How can it flourish and do I want to be there?'
The beauty of their relationship is that because they aren't bound together by a contract,
they get to choose to be with one another every day.
They get to decide that they want to wake up next to each other, and Goldie loves that
she has the freedom to always choose Kurt.
What do you think of Kurt and Goldie's relationship?
Do you think their secret to making it work is avoiding marriage entirely?
How do you feel about unconventional relationships?
We want to know what you think!