I have a friend whose grandmother used to say
that she couldn’t understand why people got into envy-jealousy, because it was the only one of the
sins that you could never possibly have any fun at. And — (Laughter)
But generally speaking, on Wall Street I think
a lot of people have had the wrong kind of grandmothers. (Laughter and applause)
I think few business operations have ever been constructed to
require so little continuing intelligence in corporate headquarters.
(Laughter)
An idiot who was willing just to sit here would have a very good record
long after the present incumbents were dead.
I think it would be unreasonable to expect that a successor would be as good at making new
investments as Warren has been in the past. Well, that’s just too damn bad.
(Laughter and applause)
If you mix the mathematics of the chain letter or the Ponzi scheme with some legitimate
development, like the development of the internet, you are mixing something which is wretched and
irrational, and has bad consequences, with something that has very good consequences.
But, you know, if you mix raisins with turds, they’re still turds.
(Laughter)
WARREN BUFFETT: That’s why they have me write the annual report. (Laughter)
I would rather throw a viper down my shirtfront
than hire a compensation consultant.
(Laughter and applause)
you want to develop a good character, and good
mental habits, and you want to learn from your mistakes, every single one, as you go along.
And of course you particularly want to avoid evil, or seriously irrational people,
particularly if they are attractive members of the opposite sex. That can — (Laughter)
WARREN BUFFETT: Charlie knows more about this —
CHARLIE MUNGER: It can lead to a lot of trouble.
WARREN BUFFETT: The expert.
Our situation in looking for this help reminds me of an apocryphal tail about Mozart.
And a young man of 25 or so once asked to see Mozart and he said,
“I’m thinking of starting to write symphonies, and I’d like to get your advice.”
And Mozart said, “Well, you’re too young to write symphonies.”
And the guy says, “But you were writing them when you were ten-years-old.” And Mozart says,
“Yes, but I wasn’t asking anybody else for advice how to do it.”
(Laughter.)
CHARLIE MUNGER: So if you remind yourself of young Mozart, why, you’re the man for us.
Competency is a relative concept. And what a lot of us need, including the one speaking,
is — what I needed to get ahead was to compete against idiots,
and luckily there’s a large supply.
(Laughter)
If people weren’t so often wrong, we wouldn’t be so rich.
(Laughter and applause)
WARREN BUFFETT: He’s finally explained it to me. OK.
(Laughter)
I do think they created something
that was probably unwise. They got countries in there that shouldn’t have been there.
You can’t form a business partnership with your frivolous,
drunken brother-in-law, you know. I mean,
(Laughter)
You have to make your partnerships with somebody else. And
I think they lowered their standards a little and it’s caused strains.
WARREN BUFFETT: I think — (laughs) — everything here is off the record, understand. (Laughter)
CHARLIE MUNGER: What you don’t want to be is like the man, when they held his funeral, and the
minister said, “Now, it’s the time for somebody to say something nice about the
deceased.” And nobody came forward. And nobody came forward.
He said, “Surely, somebody can say somebody — something nice — about the
deceased.” And nobody came forward.
And finally, one man came up. And he said, “Well,” he said, “His brother was worse.”
(Laughter)