Hi there, it’s Asiya.
And in this video I'll show you some sentences or even paragraphs from different IELTS General
writing Task 1 letters and you will need to find mistakes then I’ll reveal correct answers
and give you the full explanation please count how many tasks you can answer correctly ready
let's get started here is the first task you need to find three mistakes ok the beginning
of the letter is dear Jack I'd like to request an information about the photo exhibition
taking place at your gallery next month there are three mistakes here can you see them please
pause the video if you'd like to think a little bit now let me show you what those mistakes
are first of all we're writing the letter to the gallery that means it's a formal letter
and in this case addressing it to Dear Jack using the first name is definitely a mistake
if you know the name of the person you could say dear Mr Jones but in most cases when you're
writing to a business or a gallery use Dear Sir or Madam the second mistake I wouldn't
say it's a deadly mistake but in formal letters you should avoid using contractions and it
is definitely preferable to write I would like instead of I'd like and the third mistake
have a look at the word information in English it’s uncountable so you cannot use an indefinite
article with it it’s just information you can say some information a piece of information
or just information now let's have a look at the corrected version Dear Sir or Madam
I would like to request some information about the photo exhibition taking place at your
Gathering next month now let's have a look at our second task here you need to find one
mistake and you know in every task you’ll be given three bullet points and you need
to describe each bullet point in a separate paragraph and you need to provide some information
about these bullet points let me show you one the bullet point is explain why you want
to take part in this exhibition okay we need to answer why here is the answer I have a
number of remarkable photographs from Arctic that will be of interest to the visitors what
is the mistake the sentence is grammatically correct but this answer is simply too short
ideas are not developed enough you need to write two three sentences on each bullet point
let me show you the corrected version some of my works may be of interest to you as an
avid photographer I participated in an Arctic tour where I was fortunate to capture some
remarkable northern landscapes and local fauna including white bears and sea lions I believe
these photographs will be a valuable addition to your exhibition this is a good length for
a main part.
It's about 50 words long now let’s have a look at the next task here you need to find
four mistakes I'm thrilled about this forhtcoming exhibition and count the days until it opens
best wishes Asiya okay that's the end of our letter what are the mistakes okay we already
know that this is a formal letter but this ending is very informal let me show you why
have a look at the last sentence I'm thrilled this is an informal expression another informal
expression expression is to count the days you shouldn't write that in a formal letter
next look at the sign off warmest wishes again it's way too informal for a formal letter
that's something you could write in an informal letter and similarly Asiya signing off with
just your first name is suitable for informal letter and definitely not for formal ones
so here is the corrected version I would be delighted to take part in the forthcoming
exhibition and look forward to hearing back from you yours faithfully Asiya Miart.
So the meaning is exactly the same but the style is formal before we continue I'd like
to make an announcement I have just released my new course where you can learn how to write
General training Task 1 letters step-by-step from the greeting to the ending and you learn
how to write your letters quickly and meet all the requirements for a band 7 plus score
One lesson is available for a free preview and I will link the course in the video description
box below now let's have a look at the next task okay here you need to find the mistakes
I'm not going to tell you how many we have the task is a family in London is looking
for someone to live with a family for 6 months and teach their children your language so
that's a family advertising a vacancy for someone to teach their children your language
for 6 months and here is some bit of the letter I write in order to apply for the position
of Russian language teacher advertised in the local newspaper last week having acquires
a PhD in linguistics I have spent three years teaching Russian and the International School
in Almaty I'm also bubbly talkative person and getting along with children is a piece
of cake for me what are the mystics if you'd like to think please pause the video otherwise
I'm going to tell you First of all the first two sentences I would say are too formal you’re
writing to a couple not to a business but saying something like I write in order to
apply that’s like you're applying for a job to a big Corporation I would say it's
a bit too formal in the next sentence having acquired a PhD again this is a very formal
expression and perhaps you don't need to be as formal when you're writing to two people
with whom you're hoping to leave for some time and the last sentence it's too informal
I'm also a bubbly talkative person bubbly and talkative are very informal words it's
not something you would write in a job application even if you're writing to private individuals
and even more informal is the idiom a piece of cake that's something you can tell to your
friends but you wouldn't write it in a letter let me show you the corrected version I would
like to enquire about the position of Russian language teacher advertised in the local newspaper
last week I would like to enquire is polite it's formal enough but it's not overly formal
again in the next sentence I'm going to say I believe both my education and personality
ideally suitable for this job so in this sentence I already summarize what I'm going to write
about and it's easier for the reader to understand me and that's a great thing to do in your
letter instead of saying having acquired a PHD I just say I studied Linguistics at University
and have a PhD in this discipline upon graduation I spent three years teaching Russian at the
International School in Almaty so this part remains the same as for my personality instead
of saying also which is quite informal I'm saying as for I am an enthusiastic and friendly
person and get along well with children I think these are qualities which the employer
may be looking for in the teacher for their children person who is enthusiastic friendly
and gets along well with children instead of bubbly and so on ok let's have a look at
the next task here you need to find the abstract with the correct style the task is a friend
you made while studying abroad asks for your help in finding a job in your country write
a letter to your friend okay this is a letter to the friend now let me read a couple of
sentences and you think if the style is correct or not KPMG one of the largest accountancy
firms recruits university graduates every year applications should be submitted in winter
via the company website what do you think about it I think it's too formal for an informal
letter to a friend even though the topic is quite formal it's about the job but this text
would be better on the company website than in a letter to a friend ok here's another
one why not have a shot at KPMG it's a huge accountancy firm I've been working for since
autumn just make sure you submit your application early in winter to have the best chance what
do you think about this one I think it's a good example in a very informal style something
like to have a shot that's an informal expression a huge accountancy firm the adjectives huge
is informal as well just make sure so starting the sentence with just is informal again but
all that is acceptable for an informal letter now the third version you could try to get
a job at KPMG where I've been working since autumn it's one of the largest accountancy
firms to have the best chance you should submit your application early in winter via the company
website what do you think about this one oh actually the style here is less informal than
in the previous one right we don't have any slang we don't have any informal collocations
but the style is correct you may have a friend who is of the same age with whom you talk
very casually or a friend who you don't know quite as well and you will be more polite
more respectful in your writing as long as you avoid very formal phrases that's absolutely
fine and another important thing is you should make sure your style is consistent you shouldn't
write something quite informal in one sentence and then quite formal in the next sentence
because you would definitely lose points for that make sure your style is consistent throughout
the letter ok how many tasks have you answered correctly please post your answer in comments
I'd like to know indeed choosing the correct style the correct tone is a big challenge
in general writing Task 1 and you can learn much more about the differences between informal
and formal style if you enroll on my new course it's linked in the video description box below
and in this course you can learn how to meet each requirement for a band 7 + score right
now you can download a free pdf with useful phrases for writing formal letters it's right
on the screen it's also linked in the video description below so thank you for watching
me today good luck with your preparation and your exam