Brainy Dose Presents:
11 Reasons Why You Don’t Like Being Around People
Do you prefer being alone most of the time and find yourself happier when you’re not
around people?
If so, you’re definitely not alone.
But have you ever thought about why you feel this way?
There can actually be a number of reasons for avoiding social situations, some of which
might surprise you.
Let’s start with the most obvious.
Number 1 - Introversion
Have you been told, perhaps more times than you can count, that you should come out of
your shell and be more social?
Then, you’re likely an introvert.
Introversion is not a disease or disorder; it is a personality trait that describes those
who are less outgoing.
Introverts are often thought of as shy due to their quiet and reserved nature, but that’s
not always the case.
Introversion is more about how you prefer to interact with others and how you recharge
your energy levels.
Unlike extroverts, who need to be around other people in order to recharge, introverts become
drained by being around others.
They do enjoy having meaningful conversations with close friends and family members, but
they find it difficult to engage with large social groups.
This is why it’s so important for introverts to take breaks from socializing; they need
space to recharge their batteries.
Number 2 - Sensory Processing Sensitivity
People with sensory processing sensitivity experience strong reactions to external stimuli,
which can make it difficult to function in social settings.
It’s often associated with autism or ADHD.
If you’re a highly sensitive person, you might have trouble being around other people
because it’s hard for you to focus on conversations when there’s so much going on around you.
You’re bothered by loud noises and bright lights and easily get distracted by things
like the sight of too many colors, strong smells, or the sound of a person chewing.
You may feel like you need more time to process information, and you might find yourself getting
upset about things that others don't seem to notice.
Sensory processing sensitivity is a real thing, and it's not something that you can just turn
off.
Number 3 - Above-Average Intelligence
If you have above-average intelligence, there’s a pretty good chance that you’re not a people
person.
You’re a thinker and a doer.
While everyone else is distracted by their phones or the latest episode of that new hit
series, you’re busy thinking, analyzing, and getting things done.
You don’t like small talk because it feels, well…
like small talk.
You want to talk about big ideas, solve problems together, and achieve mutual understanding.
You want meaningful conversations with those who share your intellectual curiosity and
passion for learning and discovery.
To put it bluntly, you don’t like being around people because you find most of them
boring.
The things they talk about, the things they do; it’s all so dull.
Number 4 - Mental Health Challenges
Certain mental health conditions can make it hard to even imagine being around people.
Depression can cause you to feel tired, sad, or irritable.
It can also make it hard to get motivated and enjoy life.
Social anxiety disorder makes it very challenging to interact with people.
You might feel shy, scared of being judged, or embarrassed when around others.
Similarly, avoidant personality disorder makes it hard to connect with others and form intimate
relationships - because you feel inadequate or inferior.
All of these can lead to avoidance of social situations altogether.
Number 5 - Asperger’s Syndrome
Asperger’s syndrome is a developmental disorder.
It’s a form of autism that affects the way one relates to others.
If you have Asperger’s syndrome, you probably don’t want to be around people.
And that’s because it can be hard for you to interact with others or understand what
they are feeling.
You might not be good at making eye contact or understanding social cues, and that can
make you feel awkward.
Also, people may do things that annoy you or make you uncomfortable, like talking too
loudly.
As a result, you come across as aloof or detached, making it difficult to make friends and maintain
relationships.
Number 6 - Low Self-Esteem
One of the main reasons people dislike being around others is that they don’t feel like
they measure up.
They don’t feel good enough, smart enough, or attractive enough.
They’re worried about what others will think of them and that they’ll be judged for their
shortcomings.
But if you’re not comfortable in your own skin, then it’s hard to feel confident around
other people.
It’s also possible that you feel this way because of how others treat you.
If someone treats you poorly, it can make you feel bad about yourself and your own worth.
This can even hold back your career and make it hard for you to go after your goals in
life.
If this sounds like you, it might be time for some therapy or counseling.
It can help you feel better about yourself so that you can start making friends and building
relationships.
Number 7 - Lack of Social Skills
This is another possible reason why you might not like to be around people.
If you have zero social skills, you probably aren’t able to make friends or keep them.
You also have a hard time relating to others and may not be able to communicate effectively.
When you do try to make conversation, your attempts are awkward and forced or worse,
they come across as rude or insensitive.
There can be several reasons for this.
Maybe you grew up in a home where the adults argued all the time or maybe it was the opposite,
they hardly ever talked and because of this, you never learned how to initiate conversations
or express your emotions.
The good news is that social skills can be learned just like any other skill, it just
takes some patience and practice!
Number 8 - Stress-Induced Social Avoidance
Stress can be defined as a state of mental or emotional strain or tension resulting from
adverse or demanding circumstances.
It can be physical or psychological, and the effects can be short-term or long-term.
When you feel like your life is too busy and hectic, it’s normal to want to retreat from
other people even from those you love.
And while there are times when it’s okay to do that, like when you need some alone
time after a long day, it can also become a habit.
As a matter of fact, social avoidance can lead to further problems down the road.
If you don’t practice interacting with others, your relationships will suffer and you’ll
end up feeling lonely more often than not.
So while social avoidance may seem like an easy fix at the moment, make sure that you
work on encouraging yourself to get out of these situations before they get worse.
Number 9 - Traumatic Experiences
If you’ve been through a traumatic experience, then it’s likely that you are going to have
some sort of post-traumatic stress disorder.
This can make you feel isolated and it can be challenging to be around others.
You’ve had a bad experience and don’t want to relive it.
Maybe you were ignored when you were younger, or you were made fun of because of your weight,
a disability, or something else.
Perhaps someone hurt you or left you when they promised never to do so.
Whatever the case, know that there are ways to move on.
A therapist can help you process your feelings and work through them in a safe space.
Number 10 - Fear of Intimacy
Intimacy requires being vulnerable, and that can be scary for some.
It can be incredibly hard to open up and let people in.
Maybe you’re afraid of being vulnerable with someone because they might see who you
really are and you’re worried that they will reject you for it.
Or maybe it’s because deep down inside, you feel like you don’t deserve love and
affection.
It’s okay to be scared of things that are unfamiliar, and it’s normal to want to protect
yourself from getting hurt.
But when your fear of intimacy is so intense that you avoid all social situations, it can
start to hold you back from things like making friends and going on dates.
Being around other people does not mean you have to tell them everything about yourself.
You can still enjoy their company without revealing anything too personal.
Number 11 - Trust Issues
It’s hard to be around people when you don’t trust them.
You might think they will hurt you, use your vulnerability against you, or take advantage
of you somehow.
If you have trust issues, it’s likely because of a past experience where someone let you
down or betrayed your trust.
Maybe they lied to you or didn’t treat your feelings with respect.
Whatever happened, it left a mark on who you are today.
But, that doesn’t mean you should give up on trusting people entirely…
If you’ve been burned before by someone who took advantage of your kindness, don’t
let that stop you from trying again!
Just because they hurt you, doesn’t mean that others will, too.
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