Hey this is Clay with relationshipnnergame and today I want to talk a little bit
about what it means when maybe your ex blocks you on on their phone or on maybe a social
media website or something like that and what your options are when that happens.
OK.
So first of all it's important to realize why they're doing this at first.
You know and what is most common is because they're fueling a sense of reactance.
Toward you.
OK so maybe you.
Maybe the last time you called them the last time he texted them or something like that.
Maybe you did something that was maybe a little bit desperate a little bit needy or maybe
you just didn't feel good from their point of view for one reason or another and maybe
that just sort of made them want to pull away.
And you know that's that's that's that's that's what that feeling of reactance is is that
feeling like pull away when somebody wants something from you that either you can't or
don't really want to give them.
That's kind of what that feeling and pulling away is right.
And oftentimes when they block you what they are trying to do is to you know it's coming
from a place of them expressing that reactance they don't want to have to deal with any more
of those.
Communications or advances that maybe make them feel a little bit uncomfortable.
Right.
So maybe you are begging the back together maybe you are trying to guilt trip them maybe
you got angry at them or something like that and that could cause them to want to block
you.
Okay that's the rationale behind that and what you do in response to this.
OK so.
What you probably want to do.
Number one if it was something.
Really bad that you say you did right the you recognize with bad and you're OK.
I really wish I didn't call you that name or whatever what you want to do is if you
still have some other channel of communication you know maybe they blocked you on the phone
maybe you can reach out to them online or e-mail or whatever.
You know what you should do is you should apologize for that obviously but you might
want to move beyond that is to just give them some space as well.
It's like hey I get the maybe what I did before.
Maybe wasn't in good taste and I'm you know I'm sorry about that.
I think maybe you'd be a good idea for both of us to have a little bit of space away from
each other right now just so we can kind of get our heads on straight.
I know I'll need to get my head on straight.
Something like that.
But I do still want to you know get back in touch with you later on I think that you know
I think I value our relationship enough to want to do that.
But right now I just need some space and I think that's a good way to do it because number
one you know when they do have that reactance towards you.
Oftentimes some space is what's going to help soften that up right because because that
reactance is kind of like a pushing away sort of like a walling out quality.
And oftentimes if you give your ex a little bit of space that wall will start to weaken
and they'll be like OK well maybe it wasn't so bad maybe I did overreact to it.
Maybe maybe we should talk about it and maybe we should makeup or whatever.
And over time that will start to soften up.
And the second thing is you know it gives you some time to focus a little bit more on
how you can better bring yourself to interact with your acts in a way that maybe doesn't
trigger that kind of reactance as well that maybe doesn't come across as needy or desperate
or doesn't you know.
Lash out at them for one reason or or doesn't it doesn't feel bad in some way that maybe
maybe is not evident to right now but you know if you can start to practice the advanced
relational skills that we talk about and some other videos and also on the Web site relationships
and a game and inside the program you know you can start to understand the you go Oh
I see it now like why did I say that.
I can understand that was like the absolute polar opposite of what I probably should have
said.
And you can start to get started to.
Be able to know a little bit more intuitively what the right thing to say is any in any
given moment.
So.
Don't worry too much about being blocked on any one means as long as you still have some
other avenue of contacting them in the future.
You know that's why it's important to have your hear your contact information for the
different people you know that it's like the phone number the Facebook I.D. all that stuff
you you're going to be able to have multiple different ways of getting in touch with them
if need be.
OK.
But you don't want to like hound them too much you definitely want to give them space
especially if they're going to go all the way to to block you.
OK.
So that is what I'd recommend if your X has blocked you either your phone number or on
line or something like that.
So again I hope that helps you out and if you'd like more help getting through your
acts and developing the skills you need to open up their hearts the two can get back
together and have a great relationship together.
I'd recommend going to relationship game dot com and signing up there for our newsletter.
I will give you lots of tips and advice and help on getting through your acts and helping
you get back together with them.
And you know if you feel it's a good fit.
For.
You.
But yeah the best place to get started is to go to a relationship game.
Thanks.