MARY: Sheldon, dinner! SHELDON: Coming.
Sorry I'm late. Shalom.
(sighs)
What's on your head?
A yarmulke. A yama-what?
It's a special Jewish hat.
It reminds the wearer that God is always over you.
(laughing)
Mom.
Oh, come on, it's funny.
It's not funny and it's not a yarmulke.
It is a coaster I crocheted at Bible camp.
Are you gonna say something to him?
Normally I would, but I got bigger problems right now.
Let's just say grace. SHELDON: Hold on.
Are these hot dogs kosher?
(laughing, snorts)
(violin screeching)
ADULT SHELDON: Over the next few days,
I continued to play the violin
in an effort to replicate the mental prowess of Einstein.
I was asked to confine my practice to the garage
by my father, mother, sister and brother.
Meemaw was fine with me practicing in the house,
but why would she care? She doesn't live with us.
Hey, George.
Hey, Herschel.
Let me guess, you're here to complain
about Sheldon's violin playing.
Under normal circumstances, I'd say yeah,
but since he started,
my chickens been dropping eggs like crazy.
That's weird. Hey, uh,
I hear congratulations are in order.
What's that you hear?
Maybe I didn't hear it. Never mind.
It's all right.
Seems like everybody knows.
You don't seem terribly enthusiastic.
(sighs)
It's the money, Herschel.
It's all about the money.
(sighs) Well, there's only one solution to that.
Which is? You got to make more money.
Thank you. Welcome.
Hey, I got to ask, did that fiddle playing
increase the fertility in all the females
around here or just my chickens? (chuckles)
I was just throwing it out there, never mind.
Wait here, I'm-a go get you some eggs.
That's okay. You're getting eggs.
Guess I'm getting eggs.
PETERSEN: All right, George,
what's so damn important? Well...
I don't want to get into the why's and wherefore's,
but I'm gonna need a raise.
Is this 'cause Mary's pregnant?
You got to be kidding me.
Does everybody in this damn town know my business?
I just-- it was taking a guess.
Tom. My wife told me.
Doesn't matter. What do you say?
Are you threatening to quit if you don't get it?
No, Tom, I'm threatening to rob a bank. Okay.
All right, well, let's not do that.
$100 a week do the trick?
Yes. Thanks. Bye.
(line ringing)
RECEPTIONIST (over phone): Temple Judea,
how can I help you?
Hello, I'd like to become Jewish.
Who would be in charge of that?
How old are you?
I'm ten. Please hold.
("Hava Nagila" hold music plays)
RABBI: Hello, this is Rabbi Schneiderman.
To whom am I speaking?
Hello, this is Sheldon Cooper.
Hello, Sheldon. Um, how can I help you?
I'm currently a Baptist and I'd like to convert to Judaism.
A Baptist named Sheldon.
Okay.
And why do you want to convert?
Very simple. It's my intention to become a great scientist
and I couldn't help but notice most of the great scientists
are Jewish, so logic dictates it's time to switch teams.
Well, I'm sure there are
many Baptist scientists you could emulate.
That's kind of you to say,
but other than Cornelis Drebbel in the 1500s,
it's pretty slim pickings.
(chuckles)
Well, Sheldon, you sound like a very smart young man.
Oh, you have no idea.