- I had to go to therapy for masturbating as a kid.
It fucking traumatized me. It's crazy.
I'm over it now.
- Okay, good.
- Yeah, no, we worked through that.
(Timmy laughs) - Okay, good.
- Very quickly.
(dramatic bouncy music)
All right.
- Hi!
My name's Timmy Rogar and I work in STD prevention.
- No.
I grew up Mormon in northern Utah.
I'm one of six kids.
My parents are still religious.
The Mormon church is very present in my life,
and I very much had to learn how to live with it.
- When you're gay, you like break the system.
So like, if you can't come here and have children,
you don't really have a purpose.
- No.
(Timmy chuckles)
I'm actually like really nervous.
This is the first time I've been like nervous to do this.
- Yeah, let's do it.
Hi!
- Hi!
- How's it going?
- All right. How are you?
- I'm good.
I'm a little nervous and my name's Timmy.
- My name's Charlotte.
I'm also nervous.
- Okay, cool. Nice to meet you, Charlotte.
- Nice to meet you too.
- We'll be nervous together.
How would you describe your sexual orientation?
- I'm Bi.
- Bisexual.
- Yeah. - Okay.
If you wanted to get married,
like what value would you put in it?
- I feel like marriage should be
between two people who love each other.
Some people, their relationships, they don't need marriage,
and I think that's fine.
Other people feel that you need to have a marriage
in order for it to be like an actual relationship.
I don't really care.
- Yeah. Do you want to get married?
- I don't know, man.
I'm 18. - Does it matter?
I'm going to guess that you're atheist.
You got like a cool punk vibe goin'.
I feel like you're a little aware of things,
but you obviously seem like you're down for life,
and ready to have a good time, and meet new people.
- I'm Jewish.
- Fuck yeah!
- Yeah!
(Timmy laughs)
- Awesome!
- I was raised with a sort of agnostic viewpoint.
Just because my parents didn't wanna force
any religion on me,
which I'm super grateful for.
Growing up I sort of learned more about the religion
and made that decision for myself.
- As it should be.
That's so great.
Charlotte, it was so nice meeting you.
- It was nice meeting you too.
- Thank you so much.
- [Timmy And Erin] Hi!
- I'm Erin.
- Erin, I'm Timmy.
- Nice to meet you.
- Nice to meet you too.
- Are you nervous right now?
- I'm kinda nervous, yeah.
- Why?
- I don't want to step on anyone's toes.
- You're not going to step on my toes,
and if you did, you're welcome to.
- All right.
How do you identify your sexual orientation?
- I identify as queer, non-binary.
I use they/them pronouns.
- Do you believe we have a soul?
- I do believe we have a soul.
- Okay, cool.
What do you think happens when we die?
- I like to believe
in something like rosy and sweet and stuff.
I just don't know.
- I don't think you're religious,
but I think you have like an appreciation for it.
The way you were talking about
what may or may not happen after we die.
I feel very similarly that,
sure, I love this idea that we're all gonna go
to a happy place,
but who can guarantee that?
- Yeah.
- Why invest in it?
Yeah. I'm going to guess like queer, non-denominational,
but you're totally, you're chillin'.
You get it.
- Okay. Yeah.
I'm actually religious.
- Oh you are!
- Yeah! - Oh, cool.
(Timmy laughs)
- I'm actually Catholic.
I definitely do things the Catholic church doesn't agree
with as being gay.
- How do you work through stuff like policy or whatnot
that hurts queer people?
- For me, it's been a long period of time of being like,
"I don't want to be Catholic. Catholicism is bad.
I don't want this. I don't want that."
There are certain things that I enjoy doing
and certain things that bring me happiness
and bring me closer to my spirituality.
And I am a very spiritual person.
So it's kind of all over the place.
- Thank you so much.
It was really nice to meet you.
- It was nice to meet you as well. Thank you.
- Definitely.
Hi! I'm like really nervous.
- Are you really?
- Yeah, yeah. - Oh my god.
- I'm Timmy.
- I'm Tanya.
- Tanya.
- [Timmy And Tanya] Nice to meet you!
- Cheers! - I love your nails!
Oh my god. - Oh, thank you.
- They're gorgeous. - I like yours too.
- Oh my god.
- So I used to do drag regularly.
- Really?
Wait, do you have a favorite drag queen?
- Willem.
(Tanya gasps)
- Oh my God. I'm a Katya stan.
- Okay. Yeah, yeah.
So, you know, drag queens.
Do you feel like queers and religion can mix?
- Oh, 100%.
Why not?
- Can I ask you your sexual orientation?
- I'm straight.
- You are straight? Oh, cool.
- Yeah, sadly.
- Sadly?
Growing up did you ever go on any like youth trips
or like youth excursions?
Anything like that?
- No.
- Oh, that's awesome.
- Yeah, no. My parents were like very strict.
- Oh were they? - So we weren't-
allowed to have like sleepovers or anything.
- Oh. Okay.
When did you have your first kiss?
(Tanya giggles)
- Probably shouldn't.
My parents are very strict.
- Oh, okay.
- Sorry.
- No, that's totally cool.
So do you have a pretty like,
not closed but not quite as open relationship
with your parents?
- No, I think it's pretty normal.
- This is the hardest one so far.
- Really? Oh my gosh.
- I'm gonna guess that you are religious.
- You're right.
- Okay. - Yeah.
Do you have a guess for which religion?
- I don't know.
So far, I don't know.
- Okay.
I'm Muslim. - Yeah, tell me what you are.
Okay!
Okay, great.
I almost guessed that and then didn't because-
- This is probably a gross assumption,
but you weren't wearing a hijab.
- Some Muslim women wear it.
Some choose not to.
I just personally don't really see that
as part of my relationship with God.
I just kind of feel it's more like inside.
Not really, for me personally, physical.
- Yeah.
- It was so nice meeting you.
- It was so nice meeting you too.
Thank you so much.
(Timmy chuckles)
- Hi.
I'm Timmy. - Hello.
I'm Zakiyah.
- Zakiyah? - Yes.
- Nice to meet you. - Nice to meet you!
- First off, can I ask some personal questions?
- Yeah, of course.
- How do you identify your sexuality-
or orientation? - Gay.
- You're gay, cool.
Are you close with your family, parents?
- I would say I'm close with them to a certain degree, yeah.
- Do they struggle with your sexuality or is it other stuff?
- My mom, she kind of struggled with it.
My dad was onboard.
He was the first one I even came out to.
- Oh really?
- Yeah. He's super supportive.
- I'm going to guess that you're atheist.
- Atheist?
- Yeah. - I am not.
- Oh, fuck.
I'm like striking out.
- I'm spiritual.
I grew up Seventh-day Adventist through my family,
but I found my own beliefs after I was diagnosed with HIV.
- I don't know much at all about Seventh-day,
but what are their views of-
- There's is pretty standard- - homosexuality?
- compared to, oh, for homosexuality at least.
It's a sin, you know.
- For sure.
- They practice it to the point where they put me
in therapy to un-gay me.
That's why I'm saying my relationship with my parents
are kinda like rocky.
- We got through it.
We're here now.
- We're here, we're queer.
- Yes. We're doin' it.
Hi!
- Hi!
- How's it going?
- Good. I'm Crystalyn.
- Can I ask if you're married?
- I was married.
- You were married?
- Yes.
I got married at a early age,
and divorced also at an early age.
- Did you have sex before you got married?
- I did. Yes.
- Okay, great.
Do you feel like there's something in us besides biology?
- Not really.
I kind of think once you die, that's pretty much it.
Yeah, I don't think it really goes anywhere from there.
- I'm going to go with atheist.
- Yes.
- Awesome. - You are correct.
- I've had a hard time identifying as atheist.
- Okay.
- And I think it's 'cause I have like mom issues.
And it would just hurt my mom's feelings
so much if I were just to blatantly say that.
I can't believe I'm saying this out loud.
I've never really talked about this.
My parents just have this pity for atheists. You know?
They're just like, "We just think that's so sad."
- We need to help them type thing?
- Just like, "How sad that you don't think
there's anything after life.
That we're here for no reason"-
type stuff. - I can see that.
My mom passed a year and a half ago.
I don't really think anything happened.
I think when she died, that was it.
And your time is limited so live it up.
That's kind of how I-
- Enjoy it.
- Yeah, exactly.
- Well, it's so nice to meet you, Crystalyn.
- Great. Thank you.
Have a good one.
- [Timmy and Jay] Hi!
- How's it goin'?
- Not too bad. How about yourself?
- I'm doing great.
- Awesome. I'm Jay.
I go by they/them pronouns.
- Nice to meet you, I'm Timmy. - Nice to meet you too.
- I love your fucking-
Juicy sandals. - Thank you.
- I love Juicy Couture.
- Everybody's askin' me about them today.
- Really? - It's amazing. Yeah.
TJ Maxx, if you're interested.
- How do you feel about gender roles in relationships?
- I'm not a fan of gender roles.
I think they're just asinine.
- Do you have a relationship with your parents?
- Me and my stepdad don't always see eye to eye.
He's pretty homophobic.
- Probably doesn't dress this way.
- Yeah, no.
- If you had to pray, how would you pray?
- Whenever I do do anything similar to praying,
it's mainly just me in my room kinda talking.
If anything's listening.
- Do you hear stuff back?
- No.
- Okay.
I'm going to guess that you're spiritual,
but not particularly religious.
- You're right and wrong.
I identify as Luciferian,
which is an off branch of the Church of Satan.
It's a religion in the organized aspect of it,
but not in the divine aspect of it.
Being your best self without it costing somebody else.
- I love that.
- Would you consider joining the Church of Satan?
- Uh no, but thank you.
I don't need to be joining anything,
but I love that it's there,
and I love that people are benefiting from it.
Thank you so much.
Nice to meet you. - Nice to meet you too.
- Appreciate your insight or whatever.
What do we call it?
- Hello.
- Hi.
- How are you?
- I'm good. How are you?
- Good. I'm Kayla.
- Kayla, I'm Timmy.
- Hi, Timmy.
- Have you ever done any party drugs?
- I have not.
- No?
- No.
- Say I invited you to a friend's house,
and we were like, "Hey, it's Sunday.
We got the whole day off.
Do you want to split a Molly with me?"
- No.
I wouldn't.
- Would you feel guilty?
- Honestly, I would probably feel like really anxious.
I like control.
So I'd probably freak out a little bit.
A little bit of a panic attack.
- Okay. I'm just going to ask some personal questions.
How do you feel about masturbation?
- I love it.
It's a whole mood.
- Yes.
- No, I used to work in an adult store,
so I'm all about- - Oh, you know all about it.
- self pleasure, self care.
- Do you feel that there are any negative side effects
to it ever?
Like it's bad for you?
- No, it's only healthy for you as far as I know.
- Right.
- [Interviewer] So what are you thinking?
- Oh gosh, this is hard.
I'm gonna guess that you are atheist.
No?
Oh, fuck.
Tell me more about yourself then.
- So I am non-denominational Christian.
- Awesome.
- I'm not a church-goer.
I don't really like the judgmental vibes.
- Okay. Gotcha.
- I'm a big believer that only God can judge us.
I'm not one to be like,
"Oh, you can't be gay or you can't have sex or masturbate."
Like what?
- I had to go to therapy for masturbating as a kid.
It like fucking traumatized me. It's crazy.
I'm over it now.
- Okay. Yeah.
- But yeah, no, we worked through that.
So then my parents for a long time were like,
"Oh, well. You can be gay and Mormon.
Just don't get married or ever have sex with anyone.
Or if you do make sure it's a woman."
- Okay.
- So I've been trying over the last seven years
I've been in Seattle to just talk more openly
about this kind of stuff.
Kayla, thank you so much for your time.
- Yes, nice meeting you.
- You too.
- That was fun.
I learned a lot today.
When you start asking these questions out loud
and you start to realize what your own assumptions are.
I feel very strongly that we all need to live and let live.
I know with my parents,
we've come to a point where I would never ask them
to leave their religion,
just as they would never ask me to not be gay.
It's fascinating and awesome
to see more religious queer people.
I think it's a sign of like healing in a way.
Or at least from my perspective
'cause I just left so pissed off.