♪ The way that you are ♪
♪ Oh, the way that you are ♪
(techno music)
- Hi guys, Tusk here.
So today I'm gonna be talking
about escalating physically
with girl on the street.
How much you should be doing it,
how much you shouldn't be doing it,
and I guess,
calibrating to the situation at hand.
So, in the next clip
you're gonna see me stopping
a long legged,
I thought she was Essex girl.
I was kinda right.
And what you'll notice I do
in the set,
is I start touching her
quite a lot.
I'm immediately spiking
it with a hand hold,
keeping a hold of her hand,
she calls me on it.
The rest of the touching I do,
it's kind of alpha.
It's leading, it's conviction,
it's incidental.
So I'm sort of putting
my arm round her,
leading her one way,
taking her the other way.
And what this does,
it just creates that sort of
dynamic of getting you comfortable.
Creating that familiarity,
so she's comfortable with your touch,
but at the same time,
it's kind of layering the fact that
it's quite an alpha thing to do.
It's creating that male female polarity.
So it's almost comfort building,
but sexualizing at the same time.
And you want to start doing this
as soon as you meet the girl,
because the longer you leave it
to touch them,
inevitably the more awkward
it is if you do one of those
stupid like awkward things
of not touching her,
but you get the number,
text her, she comes out on the date,
you wait til the end of the date,
and then you lunge in like a rapist,
on a dark ally way for the kiss.
You know, the whole thing's just
skewed from the beginning.
You could make this very easy.
It's completely in your hands.
Start touching the girl early on.
Now look, the caveat to this,
if she was a bitchy,
or a bit of a stony face,
typical Eastern European girl,
I'm not gonna be randomly putting
my arm round her if it's been
quite a standoffish interaction
in terms of the distance and stuff.
So practice this,
calibrate to the girl.
You can see her energy levels
are pretty pumped up,
she's enjoying it,
she's mirroring my vibe
which is quite chill, quite relaxed,
but having a lot of fun with it.
And I'm able to get away with this
incidental touching more.
But obviously calibrate to the situation.
That's key.
But yeah, watch the clip,
and let me know what you think.
Excuse me.
- [Woman] Hello.
- [James] This is very forward,
I'm not supposed to do this,
because I should be at home
swiping on Tinder or something.
- [Woman] Oh God, yeah.
- But I saw you,
and I thought, you know what,
I'm gonna speak to a girl
that I think is hot,
and see what happens.
- [Woman] Hello!
I've never had that happen before.
- [James] You've never been stopped,
with legs like those,
and the way you strut like
a model on a catwalk,
you've never been stopped?
- [Woman] Oh no, I've got the hump.
I'm just like, "Oh, fucks sake".
- [James] I thought is she gonna be an Essex girl.
I half thought-- - Everyone says I'm Essex,
I'm sorry, opposite.
- [James] What do you mean opposite,
what's the opposite of Essex?
- [Woman] Supposed to be posh.
- What do you mean you're supposed to be?
- [Woman] Well Essex is a bit
more chappy, isn't it?
- It's got a reputation.
- [Woman] Yeah.
- [James] Doesn't mean it's a bad one, necessarily.
- [Woman] Where are you from, anyway?
You speak well.
- [James] I'm actually born in Hong Kong.
- [Woman] Really?
- I'm fluent in Chinese.
- [Woman] Are you?
- No, absolutely not.
- Oh, see. I'd love to be.
- [Woman] What do you do,
are you a banker?
- Why do you think that?
- [Woman] You just look like a banker.
- A banker?
You say it like it's a bad thing.
- [Woman] No, it's just...
- I work for a dust bin cleaning company.
- [Woman] Is this another joke?
- No, I just decided to like,
on the Friday to dress up
in my Friday best,
and come around and hit on
girls with nice eyes,
and nice legs.
- [Woman] Oh wow.
Well thank you very much.
- What's your name?
James, lovely to meet--
- [Woman] Nice to meet you too.
- So where are you from?
- [Woman] Just come from Kings Cross.
- I was having this discussion - Still holding hands?
today with someone,
and they were saying
counties are very fucking confusing.
Cause I'm technically from Middlesex,
but actually you won't know that,
you'd know Putney.
So when you say,
that could mean fucking anything.
- [Woman] Yeah, I get Putney.
Well, (mumbles) but I'm moving into London soon.
- [James] What brings you into
the big bad smog?
- [Woman] I do--
- [James] I know--
- [Woman] My father lived round here.
The commute's like an hour and a half.
- [James] Yeah, cause when you say,
where was it again?
But it sounds like,
I think I went there for paintballing once.
It was like rolling green fields,
old men in pubs drinking cider,
falling off chairs.
It seems very out of the way.
And what do you do when
you're not doing this?
Are you a bit of a party girl?
- [Woman] I've been single
for like six years.
- [James] Jesus, that's even longer than me.
- [Woman] Why, how long have you been single?
- [James] You seem like a relatively normal
girl unless you've got a knife in your bag.
And you're quite clearly quite attractive,
you keep in shape.
So why are you single?
- [Woman] I just--
- [James] Are you like a crazy cat lady?
Did something kill your ex-boyfriends, or something?
There's no reason you've been
single for six years.
- [Woman] Probably too obsessed
with the girls.
- [James] You're too obsessed with the girls?
- [Woman] If I'm out,
I just get pissed at being talked to.
- Oh gosh, I thought we're going
a different direction.
All right, come to mine.
Bring all of your girl friends.
This is gonna work out quite.
- [Woman] I don't know, I just pick the wrong guys.
- So do you like the guys that
just got out of prison?
Or the church boys?
- [Woman] No, they seem decent,
and they don't.
They're just not.
They sack me off.
- They sack you off?
- [Woman] Well they just cheat, don't they.
- [James] What they say tho, in life,
what you are is you reflect
that sort of, you draw that sort
of stuff in.
So inherently, maybe you've got a
heart of darkness as well.
- [Woman] Maybe, yeah.
It's probably me.
- How would your friends describe you,
would they be like,
she's nice, or she looks innocent.
Like, passive with male,
but actually she's got claws?
- [Woman] Trying to suss me out, aren't you?
- I reckon it's the second one.
- [Woman] No, not at all.
I'm nice.
- Never trust anyone that
says they're nice.
I'll admit I'm a bit
of an asshole.
But you know,
you see what you get.
I'm like a tin of (mumbles),
I do what I say on the tin.
- [Woman] Just stopped for a laugh (muffled)
- Yeah, so you like clubs
rather than bars?
- [Woman] No, love a bar.
Love a glam bar.
A night out, yeah.
- Anywhere in particular you been
recently you'd recommend?
I'm always on the hunt for new spots.
- [Woman] Oh really.
- I like Shoreditch a lot
but I've kind of done the whole
Shoreditch on strip.
Actually, I'll tell you where
it's really good in summer,
Camden by the River.
- [Woman] Right.
- But it's more of a day...
You're gonna get hit by these guys.
So what are you doing tonight, anyway?
- [Woman] Well I'm going for dinner,
I've got dinner.
- You've got a Tinder date,
you should have told me.
- [Woman] No, it's with two girls.
- [James] Okay, back to the girl thing.
- [Woman] Yeah, dinner with my ladies.
- [James] Where are you dining?
- [Woman] We're going to that...
Oh god it is one of them!
Just got stopped on route.
- [James] See, she was flirting.
She stopped me on the street,
told me I've got a beautiful ass.
I was like oh I'll give
this girl a chance, you know?
- [Woman] Love it.
I didn't get your name,
you didn't tell me your name.
- James.
- [Woman] James, oh James.
- And you are?
I'm gonna let you go,
but another time.
I think you're hot.
Maybe take you out for drinks.
- [Woman] Of course, you can.
Oh, phone's coming out!
- [James] Somewhere.
- [Woman] I've just pulled, lucky me.
- Hey not yet, come one.
You still got clothes on.
- [Woman] What are you doing tonight,
where are--
- You know what, I've done that thing
of saying (mumbles),
then I said, you know what.
I'm gonna do some, I'm gonna come out
just for one.
But inevitably, because I've actually
labeled it as one,
I'm gonna be calling home
at 9:00a.m., with my drinking
my body weight in vodka.
- [Woman] I love it, it's great.
- [James] I can't do it anymore,
I just turned 30, I'm feeling old.
- [Woman] Really.
- [James] How old are you?
- [Woman] 23.
- [James] Good age.
- [Woman] Yeah.
It's not that bad.
Still got a bit in me left.
Oh fuck, sorry.
- [James] Look at you, already causing trouble.
- [Woman] There you go.
Lovely to meet you.
- Have fun tonight. You too.
- All right guys,
so you've just seen me in set
with a quite attractive
sort of faux Essex girl.
But yeah, just the key points again.
An easy one to do is the hand hold.
Spikes it up immediately.
Instead of shaking their hand,
just hold the hand like I did.
You can lean in close,
and fractionate in.
A few times I was leaning in close,
create that dynamic,
and then leaning back out.
Sort of creating that push pull tension.
Another thing I picked up recently
I heard from another guy,
which is great for beginners,
if you wanna try and focus
on the non verbals.
When you lean in like that,
not necessarily the physical side.
Is before the set, think right,
I'm gonna come out of the set
and remember what color
this girls eyes were.
And what that will do is
really focus on the eye contact
side of things.
It's gonna create that sexual tension
in that bubble.
Especially if you move in close.
So that's a great thing to focus on.
A lot of problems with beginners I see
are holding eye contact with a girl,
and at the end of the day,
you've gotta be able to do that.
Because she's not gonna see you
as a sexual threat if she can
hold more dominant eye contact than you.
In terms of the physicality,
you've gotta be more dominant,
and in terms of the eye contact,
you've gotta be more dominant as well.
I hope you enjoyed the video.
Like and subscribe if you wanna
see me really upping the
physical escalation.
I'm gonna be releasing a few video
on the actual date.
What you do on the date, soon.
So you'll be able to see that.
But as a very beginner,
as a sort of line of thread
and thought to follow,
start touching girls early.
Do it incidentally,
do it lightly.
Calibrate, respond if they're backing off,
chill out a bit with it.
Again, the more you practice,
the more you're inherently able
to judge in the situation.
Whether it's right or wrong to do.
But until next time.
(upbeat music)