Hello, humans
Of the world
Sometimes we have to remind ourselves that we talk to humans and not just lights and cameras
And dogs
Mainly we talk to dogs, to be honest
I just put some orange peel in the fire. Makes a nice smell.
Oooo, I like that
So, hello
This is a catch-up of our weekend
Because we haven’t been able to vlog and edit properly
Really sorry about that
It’s quite hard when you’ve only got my MacBook Air
Which is—what is it? The 11 inch screen
It’s the small screen and it’s not very—it’s the slowest one. It’s the cheapest one because I wanted—
I just didn’t think it was worth—anyway, it was really boring about my—basically, we had one…
But it’s OK, because these kind people have helped us
So now my laptop is going to get fixed so I can make proper videos
We’ll all be good. Everything will be sorted by the time we go to Malaysia
C: Oh, way before. Way before that J: That we are assured
J: Well, the man said, "January." "We’ll see." C: Oh, really? Oh no.
J: I was like, "…Oh."
J: But we did live stream yesterday, so that’s something C: From the iPad
You can actually see that. I’ll put the link in the description.
Hello, Walter. Walter’s very interested in my orange.
But sometimes I give you orange segments and you get very unhappy about it.
C: He doesn’t want it. Ignore him.
J: You don’t want it. Go away.
But for more updates on the laptop, follow me on Twitter,
where I tweet about the laptop drama.
Yeah, this weekend’s been super busy,
so we’re just going to take you through and catch you up on what we’re doing
C: Friday night to Sunday night
C: A 48-hour mid-Christmas Vlogmas special J: Vlogmas Extravaganza
Yeah.
Is it mid-Christmas? We’re so close to Christmas now.
C: Well, I dunno. Yeah, we’re over half-way now. J: It’s only a week until Christmas Eve.
C: We’re over the half-way now
J: Stop staring at my orange; it’s very weird
So, Friday night, we went to the YouTube party
C: YouTube Christmas party
So, yep, Friday night we got the train up
All the way to St. Pancras. It’s very handy.
Typically, we were like we’re gonna get the five o' clock train,
but knowing us if we don’t get that, we HAVE to get the five-thirty-five
So, anyway, we got the 18:05.
We can never keep time
J: [?] I must say
But then we arrived there at 19:30 and it was doors open from six until eight,
and if you’re not there at eight, 'doors closed, you can’t come in'
So we got in the queue
C: - At like twenty to eight -
J: - yeah, at twenty to eight -
and then we stood in the queue outside in the freezing cold for half an hour
Edging ever close like, "Oh, my God."
We actually got to the front of the queue at five minutes past eight and I was like that’s it then we've gotta home
But they were all right, they let us in
J: It was fine. They were letting people in at like quarter past
C: Nine
J: Nine or whatever C: I dunno what time it was, but yeah
J: People were just coming in and out; it was such a lie. C: I mean, it was a really good party.
C: We had a really good time.
J: So, yeah. There were loads and loads of people. I’ve never actually seen so many people in YouTube Space.
J: I’ve been there for other parties and there just haven’t been that many people
J: It’s not a lot of movement. Not a lot of room to run around.
C: No, but they did have two bars. They had the normal bar open and the other one.
C: There was like a cocktail bar. I got that really cool cocktail with the pom pom thing.
J: Oh, you did C: That was like a pomegranate something or other?
C: Pomegranate martini?
C: That was nice.
J: So it had to have a pom pom C: Yep.
J: to go with the pom.
J: Oh, there was a performance by Poppy. C: Yes, there was.
C: She sang, I think, a couple of songs
C: You live streamed it on your Instagram account J: I did! I live streamed it on our JESSIEANDCLAUD Instagram account
Which you should totally go and follow
But yeah, go and follow that because it has more life stuff than just fashion
J: Although I like fashion C: Yeah, there’s obviously pictures of me in it
as opposed to just pictures of Jessica’s dresses and clothes
I’m in both situations 'cause I’m usually taking the pictures of your outfits
You are, you are. That’s very true.
J: And we saw our friends Zoe and Haley
J: Did some bad dancing
J: Or was it good dancing?
C: I don’t think we really danced that much. I mean, I filmed you dancing a little bit.
C: Which was very similar to how you and Zoe danced at the Stonewall LGBT YouTube party.
J: What can I say? Zoe has moves.
She does, I think she has set moves. They’re kind of like—
whatever song is playing, it seems to be the same tempo of dance moves she has.
Just saying.
Maybe you wanna up-tempo or down tempo a little bit next time.
Aww, harsh! I love Zoe’s dancing.
She’s got the wavy one; the back and forth one.
My god, you’ve got it down. You know, you really know already.
I don’t watch Zoe. God.
Although you should totally actually watch Zoe. Actually go and follow Zoe, because she is very funny.
And Haley. They do comedy stuff.
We met them in the Women Who Do Comedy.
Yeah, we did. The hoo ha ha thing that I’m doing
And you’ll see our video for that in January.
January 15th.
Which is the big release day.
J: We’re all releasing our videos C: Oh, that’s exciting.
I know. It’s really scary, though.
Why?
Well, you know. Scary-nervous type of excitement.
C: Oh, there was fake snow all over the floor. Like the whole place was covered in fake snow.
J: Yeah, they really decorated it really amazingly.
C: Which must have been an absolute--like, I didn't even think how they're gonna clean it up
C: They might some mega suction hoovers afterwards J: Yeah!
C: And loads and loads of hoover bags
It looked amazing and it was so festive
We were like, "Ah, yeah, loving the snow scene; loving the snow scene,"
and then [mimics sound of fake snow suddenly falling from ceiling]
C: Oh, yeah, then it snowed more J: It snowed on us
C: It snowed on our heads J: On our heads!
C: In our hair J: Went in our drinks
C: Oh, my God, yeah J: Went down my top!
C: Luckily, my drink was nearly empty,
but Haley’s poor drink – her red wine – was completely just, like…
and she was just sort of sipping around it.
J: It was full of snow!
I don’t know what that snow is; I think you should stop drinking that.
I think it was like tiny bits of polystyrene.
So, completely fine if you did drink some.
J: Is it fine? C: I think it just goes straight through you
J: Or does it stay forever?
J: Poor Zoe had to go off to her work's--
J: What’s happening? C: Got a little friend. Got a little friend down here.
C: Walter’s just, like…poking his head in J: Hi, Walter!
J: Hi.
J: She had to go to her work’s Christmas party afterwards
and she had snow all in her hair,
and we had to try and pick it out.
Actually, when we got home, you found snow in your bra.
J: Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah! I took my dress off C: Yeah, on the dance floor.
C: She took her dress off in the dance floor, obviously got loads of snow on her bra,
and then did her dress back up
and then when we got home, she was like, “Oh, it’s all over my bra, how did it get there?”
J: No, it went down the front of my dress C: Yeah, no, she didn’t actually take her dress off
C: Yeah, Poppy did a performance and then Jessica did a performance
C: Oh, there were those really cool hired dancers.
J: I loved those. C: They did the wing thing.
Yes, and they were flashing and it was so good
They didn’t have a lot of space because again it was SO crowded
There was really not room to move
It was quite good with the fake snow on the floor, because with their wings they kind of
J: Swept it up C: and then it swept all the, like...
Maybe they just hired a load more of those to come and clear it up at the end
C: And then people at the end with bags collecting it all J: That’s why the dancers were there!
J: We thought they were there for us, but they weren’t! C: No, they were just the janitors
J: They were just sweeping around and we were like C: Just sweeping stuff
J: "Amazing, let’s all get our phones out and video them."
But no, it was just the cleaners
That’s just what Google cleaners look like
J: They’re just fancy, what can you say? C: Yeah. Really fancy.
Speaking of people who work at Google
J: This is Charlie. Hi, Charlie.
C: Ah, yes. J: Charlie’s in our vlog now.
J: Charlie’s awesome; she works at YouTube Space
C: And we met her girlfriend
[Both] Marie C: who also has a channel
J: And then we stalked them a bit on Instagram afterwards
No, we didn’t!
Did we not? Did we not?
I might have done a slightly drunken message on the way home like, “Be my friend!”
Not quite, "Be my friend," but, yeah.
J: But we went down--yeah, we had to stop liking,
because you know that thing where it gets weird if you 'like' a picture that's over a certain amount of time old
I was a bit drunk.
I had the excuse of being a little bit drunk!
You had no excuse; you let me do this.
Just because you wanted to do it too and didn't have an excuse;
you were like, "I'll let my drunk wife do it and just say she was drunk."
Shhhh, it's fine
It wasn’t too tiring for you, because it’s like…
Yeah, it’s an easy journey.
The worst thing for me is when you have to travel across London.
Luckily, we just got the last train from St Pancras.
J: We did. We did. C: Yeah.
C: Took us all the way home J: Because if you don’t get that train, the next one is 5AM
And then Saturday was a bit of a chill day.
C: Yeah, just kind of, like..had a bit of a-- J: You had a mini hangover, but not too bad
No, I wasn’t too bad. I cooked you breakfast.
J: You did. C: Yeah.
It was a really nice, sunny day
And then you got that nice package from…
J: From Top Vintage! They sent me a Christmas present early; it was really nice
C: Yeah, it was really cute. They sent us really cute - J: So, aww, thank you.
C: - really cute like little green gloves with pom pom bits
J: Yeah, they're from Powder. C: Yeah.
J: They're really, really neat.
So we decided to go out for a walk and take the gloves and get some shots in the sunshine,
J: We did a fashion shoot with the gloves,
[both] because why not?
If the sun is shining and you’ve got some clothes, and you’ve got a perfectly model-esque wife—
Is that a word, model-esque?
C: Can be now. J: Yeah, we’ll take that, yeah.
One of my many made-up words.
And we’ve got one of those remotes that you click so that we can take pictures of us
when I can’t be behind the camera and in front of it at the same time.
And I didn’t realise I actually set the camera on continuous shutter.
J: Yeah… C: So I pressed the remote and it was like
And we were like, “Look, we’re so adorable and cute, wait, why has it not stopped?"
"Why is it still going?!”
Yeah, but it’s actually sweet. If you watch it together it looks like a little stop motion film
That’s my life
Yeah, it was so sweet. And then we came home and we baked cakes
C: Yeah J: I taught you how to make cupcakes
C: Yeah, I know, I was like, “God, I haven’t done this for so long.”
C: “I know this is one of the easiest recipes, but I can’t remember actually how to make cupcakes.”
J: Yeah...
C: We don’t know what sex the baby’s going to be – our niece or nephew –
C: so we dyed half the batch blue J: No, a third
C: A third of the batch blue, a third of the batch pink,
and then a third of the batch chocolate chip
Because maybe it won’t be a boy or a girl
J: It will be chocolate chip C: Yeah, I was like it could be undecided.
It could be polka dot
It could. You don’t know how that baby’s gonna come out.
It will be a bit chocolate chip! It’s gonna—it’s got half...
C: It’s like semi-white; semi-yellowy/brown. J: Yeah, it will be slightly tan
C: Whatever colour I am.
When we go to Malaysia, I’ll be like five times darker
Oh, my God, she tans like this
And then we had the baby shower!
[Both] Yay!
That was a bit manic. We had to kind of rush around; walk the dogs.
C: Get everything done J: We had two million balloon issues
C: Oh, yeah, we had to get the balloons blown up
C: Anyway, it was good, and then we went--oh, we had to ice the cakes
Oh, yeah. Hundreds-and-thousands.
Yeah. Well, you can’t have cupcakes without hundreds-and-thousands in my mind.
What are you doing, really?
Everyone brought some food.
C: Julia’s other little sister-in-law brought homemade fudge
and her mother-in-law brought some ginger cupcakes
C: Stem ginger cupcakes
C: People brought quiche and carrot cake
C: So there was lots of cake, but there was also like pizza
and sausages and crisps and dips and cheese
J: I think we successfully surrounded her with love C: Sorry, I’m just listing lots of food
J: It’s all right, honey, it’s almost time for dinner
J: As you can tell
“Cheese, bread, crisps!”
Yeah, we surrounded her with love
Yeah, I think she had a really nice time
C: Her belly is getting particularly large
J: That’s crazy C: And then she opened all her presents
J: Yeah, lots of muslins
C: They’re not called “muzzluns”
J: Muslin! It’s a muslin. It’s a muslin cloth!
C: Everyone calls it a muslin
J: Muslin C: Muslin
J: Muslin. It’s a muslin cloth! C: Can you say muslin, darling?
[Repeating word with arguably different pronunciations]
J: Muslin. It’s a muslin cloth!
C: OK, I think there’s some hearing issues going on here
J: Deaf girl problems
C: It’s "muslin," isn’t it?
J: [Tries pronunciation] I’m saying it!
C: OK. J: I’m saying it. Muslin.
J: Muslin. C: Yeah. Muslin. That’s better.
J: [Fast] Muslin.
C: Doesn’t make it better when you say it faster!
C: Anyway
C: So we got a lot of muslin cloths, probably as many as the times Jessica just said it
C: She got that many.
J: Yep.
Oh, and she got a jumper that was knitted, but it was too small for the baby’s head,
so…we put that on Tilly.
It’s Tilly jumper now.
C: Yeah, so she looks pretty darn cute in that J: She looks so cute!
J: Oh, my God. C: What else have we done? Now we’re back home
C: and we’ve summed up the weekend.
J: Now I’m gonna edit this video.
C: I was like, "Oh, we'll do it--"
C: Our plan was that we’d do it together, because normally we’ve got two laptops on the go
Alas, I will just have to peer over her shoulder and be like the backseat driver,
saying, “Why don’t you do it like this?” and she’ll be like, “No. Leave me.”
J: Fun evening.
Aw, I’m a bit broody now.
After the baby shower?
Maybe after just seeing the baby. There was a baby there.
Aww.
Oh, that’s a bit better.
J: That’s a bit better, isn’t it? C: She’s like, “Er, lady, I was busy playing with my toys.”
J: Oh, hello. Oh, yes. [Kissing noises]
And we will see you on Monday
Yes. And don’t forget…
...to...um...
C: You’ve forgotten already! J: Hang on, hang on.
J: And don’t forget to enter the give-away!
J: Yay! C: Oh, yeah.
And win Christmas goodies, yay!
And take pictures of your Christmas outfits
and tag them on Instagram,
with JOOTC (that’s Jessica Out of the Closet)
XMAS,
because with your fancy outfits, I’m planning on doing something special with my favourites.
C: Ooo. J: Mmm.
And we’re going to post loads more Christmassy goodness on our JESSIEANDCLAUD Instagram,
which is good,
so go follow that.
And have a lovely week, as well.
J: I hope you've had a really nice weekend C: Yeah, get that Christmas shopping done!
C: You’ve only got, like, seven days
J: Bye, bye!
[Joy to the World instrumental]