You're learning with nine to five English - business English for the workplace
Hi, Tim here with another [9] to [5] English lesson in
Today's lesson we're going to learn how to disagree with ideas
people disagree with each other's ideas all the [time] in fact
Disagreement isn't just natural
it's
necessary
How else can we sort out the good ideas from the bad ones?
But disagreeing with people isn't always easy
If you're not [careful], you [can] make people feel hurt or angry
So how can you do that? How can you tell someone you don't like their idea without upsetting them
well one thing you can do is avoid stating your disagreement too strongly for
Example you can say I'm not sure that's a good [idea]
What you're really saying is that it is not a good idea
But it's softer if you sound a bit unsure
the word might
Can work this way as well as in that
might not be the best way to go and
Notice that both these ways of disagreeing
focus on the idea
Not the person presenting the idea
focusing on the idea can help reduce the [risk] of upsetting the person you're disagreeing with
Another way to carefully disagree with an idea is to use a special
expression that softens your words a
Couple of good ones are to be honest
and
I'm afraid
Starting a sentence with these expressions can [help] your disagreement sound more polite
How about practicing these different ways to disagree?
You're going to hear some [examples]
after each example
try repeating it yourself
ready
Let's give it a go
I'm
Not sure that's the best option here
I'm afraid I don't totally agree with you
To be honest, I [think] that would be difficult
Well that might not be the best way to go
So we've [just] practiced some simple ways of disagreeing carefully
but there's another really effective way to disagree, and that's what I call the
yes, but
approach
with the yes, but approach you actually start by agreeing or
Saying something good about the idea
then you use the word but
To introduce your disagreement or the reason why you disagree?
for example you might say
good idea, but we don't have enough time or
you could say
Yes this option is cheaper, but it doesn't look very nice
Why is this yes, but approach effective?
Well it shows that you [have] an open mind
[I] mean if you can say something good about the person's idea
Then you've clearly thought carefully about it
You're not just disagreeing to be difficult or to start an argument
Now it's your turn to practice using the yes, but approach
Remember to repeat each example after you hear it
Good idea, but nobody has the time [to] make it happen
I see what you're saying, but I'm not sure I can agree
Although it costs less. I really don't think it's as good
okay, so we've practiced some different ways of
disagreeing carefully
But sometimes you don't want to be careful
sometimes
You want to make it very clear that you disagree?
And you're not worried about making someone feel bad in
This situation you can say what you think?
very directly and clearly
for example you might say
that's out of the question or
There's no way we could do that
Both of these expressions mean that something is impossible
Another way to disagree. Strongly is to ask a question like
Do you really think that would work?
What you really mean is
That won't work
But by asking a question like this
It makes it sound as if you're surprised that someone might actually believe it's a good idea
One more way of disagreeing. Strongly is to tell someone they must be kidding or
Joking of course the person isn't really joking but saying this
Makes it sound like their idea is terrible
Now let's practice these expressions
for disagreeing strongly
Once again repeat [the] examples after you hear them
Do you really think that would work?
That's out of the question
There's no way we could do that
You've got to be kidding
so we've learned some different ways of
disagreeing with ideas
but how do these expressions sound in the
conversation
Let's listen to a short dialogue between two co-workers
They're talking about whether or not they [should] hire a person named Jill
Okay, it's clear to me that we [should] hire Jill
I'm afraid I don't totally agree with that
Well, she's got a lot of experience. I know experience is important, but she's not a good fit
as you
[heard] the man disagrees carefully with the idea of hiring Jill
then when the woman mentions Jill's experience the man starts by acknowledging that
experience is important before he disagrees by using the word but
Now it's your turn to practice
Will repeat the dialogue, but this time we're going to beep out the second speaker's words
You will have to say those parts yourself
remember to start by disagreeing
carefully
Then you can use a yes, but approach to comment on Jill's experience
Okay, it's clear to me [that] we should hire Jill
Well, she's got a lot of experience
all right, we've learned some great ways to
disagree with people's ideas
carefully, and
we've also
practiced disagreeing strongly with ideas
Be sure to tune in next time when [we'll] start learning how to talk about your personal background
until then so long and happy learning