Well, the Oscar nominations just came out on Tuesday.
Congratulations to everyone who was nominated.
And I'm happy to say that Hollywood is finally
showing females some respect.
This year everyone--
[CHEERING]
Yeah.
Listen to this.
This year, everyone in the Best Actress category is a woman.
So we--
[CHEERING]
We did it.
[LAUGHTER]
There are a lot of great movies out there.
You know, there are also a lot of bad movies out there.
And-- well, I don't want to say bad.
Bad is not the word.
It's just that they don't have good acting
or writing or directing.
So they're just not good.
And I don't even understand how bad movies get made,
but they do.
There's a lot of bad movies.
And I want to show you something I found.
And I don't think you've ever seen this.
I don't know who's seen these.
But these are really real--
someone gave someone money and said, "Yes."
And then--
[LAUGHTER]
--not only that, but then afterwards
said, "Let's release it.
This is good."
So this is a clip from a movie that's called "Shark Attack
3: Megalodon."
[LAUGHTER]
Here's the thing about this one.
This one was released in 2002, not that long ago.
And the special effects are probably 1952.
[LAUGHTER]
I can't believe how bad this is.
[SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING]
[LAUGHS] [SCREAMS]
[LAUGHTER]
[APPLAUSE]
You know, if you don't have enough money to make a movie,
don't make a movie.
[LAUGHTER]
That's insane.
So this next clip-- this is from 1986.
It's a martial arts movie called "No Retreat, No Surrender."
This is-- the character-- there's a training montage.
And it starts off-- first of all,
it starts off very impressive.
And you'll see what I mean with the push up.
And then it takes an odd turn.
[MUSIC PLAYING]
Nobody told you that you'd face the truth alone.
But you got the power to begin.
Stand up and fight for what you are.
[LAUGHTER]
Your biggest challenge is the one that lies within yourself.
[LAUGHTER]
[APPLAUSE]
Oh man.
Isn't that impressive though, the two finger--
the one armed push up?
Yeah, that's amazing.
Yeah.
Because one armed push up, I think you could probably do.
I could do it.
Yeah.
Could you do a two finger?
But with two fingers, no.
I don't know.
[CHEERING]
That's difficult. It is.
Yeah.
But two fingers?
That's-- listen, I would say the two finger thing is a little
difficult. Like--
[LAUGHTER]
One, OK.
But the two finger-- but I'll tell you what.
I'll make that two fingered thing happen before I do that.
Yeah.
[LAUGHTER]
All right.
This last clip is--
this is my favorite one.
This is unbelievable.
I cannot even get over this.
And I could watch it again and again and again.
This is a Turkish film called "Karate Girl."
It's the longest death I have ever seen on camera.
[SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING]
[GUNSHOT]
[SCREAMS]
[GUNSHOT]
[SCREAMS]
[LAUGHTER]
[GUNSHOT]
[SCREAMS]
[LAUGHTER]
[APPLAUSE]
Wait.
Oh.
Wait.
It's not over.
He's not dead yet.
Here's the second half.
[LAUGHTER]
[GUNSHOT]
[SCREAMS]
[GUNSHOT]
[SCREAMS]
Still not dead.
[APPLAUSE]
And it's called "Karate Girl."
She does one thing to his neck in the beginning,
and the rest is with a gun.
I don't understand.
[LAUGHTER]
She's karate girl.
Just kill him with the hand.
If you see a bad movie that's good, please send it to me.