﻿Hey Guys, I’m Kya
and I’m Andrew,
and when you’re planning your next vacation,
you shouldn’t limit yourself to destinations that actually exist.
Punta Cana might be fun, and Australia is always a hoot,
but next time your wanderlust strikes,
there’s a Kingdom in the Marvel Universe that offers wonders beyond your wildest dreams,
I mean, if they let you in.
IF they let you in.
Of course, we’re talking about Wakanda.
The tiny African nation is the richest country on Earth 616,
and we’re not just talking about gross domestic product.
No we're not, because
for thousands of years, Wakanda has developed a rich culture,
steeped in tradition, advanced in technology,
and untouched by colonists, imperialism, and interlopers.
Spears? I'm afraid you'll have to do better than that.
...Or not.
There’s no place on the planet quite like Wakanda,
and now that they’ve joined the global community,
There’s never been a better time to visit.
That’s why we’re here with a guided tour of
The Wonderful World of Wakanda
The sights!
The sounds!
The superheroes!
From border to border, Wakanda is a tourist’s dream,
but before you trek through a techno-organic jungle,
or sample the local cuisine,
you should pay tribute to the nation’s history with a visit to the
Great Mound.
That’s where a massive meteor hit Earth thousands of years ago,
and forever changed the destiny of the small tribe that stumbled across it.
It was made of a strange, sound-absorbing alien metal called, you guessed it, Vibranium,
which made for excellent weapons, and, as we’d later learn, shields.
The most versatile substance on the planet... And they used it to make a Frisbee.
The radioactive Vibranium mutated everything around it.
creating the Heart-Shaped Herb that gives a Panther their power,
And turning a bunch of tribesman into horrible monsters.
With help from the goddess Bast,
their chief Bashenga became the first Black Panther.
He defeated the demons,
locked down the great mound,
and united all the warring local tribes under his banner to become one nation.
And thanks to all that Vibranium,
which is so rare it’s worth about $10,000 per gram,
They got moneyyy.
It's all about the scrillions.
Wakanda became one of the most advanced and wealthiest countries in the world,
allowing them to build towering monuments and soaring cities like the next stop on our guided tour:
The Golden City of Birnin Zana
On first glance, the capital of Wakanda seems like a shining, peaceful, impossible utopia.
Because that’s exactly what is.
Their resources, technology and isolation allowed Wakandans to create a society where education and healthcare are completely free.
Hmm.
At birth, each citizen is given their Kimoyo Beads,
a high-tech wearable that’s equal parts iPhone, Encyclopedia, and MedicAlert bracelet.
Not that you’d even need it much, considering that the country has literally found the cure for cancer.
They still won’t share it with the rest of the world,
but inside Wakanda, everyone has access to the same vast knowledge,
which creates a sense of community that’s unmatched anywhere in the Marvel universe.
[OFFSCREEN] In the comics, they go "why won't you share it with the rest of the world?" and they go:
If they cared about their people's health, they wouldn't sell cigarettes.
Damn that's cold. That's such a Black Panther answer.
Get your shit together, and maybe you'll get the cure for cancer.
Now, Wakanda has more to offer than just sci-fi tech and socialism.
Amidst the bustling streets and skyscrapers of Birnin Zana,
You’ll also see plenty of statues and icons paying tribute to the country’s deep religious roots,
None more impressive, or sacred, than the majestic
Royal Palace.
This colossal monument to the Panther god is the heart of the Kingdom,
guarding over the monarch, their family, and their beloved subjects.
After forming the country,
Bashenga’s Black Panther cult elbowed out all the other competing tribes, Civ style, to become the nation’s official religion,
making Wakanda’s king the head of both Church and State.
The mantle is passed down through the generations,
but those who wish to claim the throne still have to earn it.
If you’re lucky, you might be able to witness the sacred Combat Ritual,
where the reigning Black Panther can be challenged for the right to rule.
Father, please! Do not do this!
It is the law, my son. This is how the kings of Wakanda have chosen to rule.
I wouldn’t get my hopes up for going on vacation and walking away the king of a global superpower, though,
since it’s only open to citizens.
Sorry to break it to you,
but even though you’re probably not joining their dynasty,
you might be able to catch a peek at
The First Family
If the Dora Milaje will let you, that is.
They’re an elite squad of women warriors that were originally formed as potential wives for the king.
The word of the day is "concubine" because that's what that is.
Thankfully, that’s no longer part of their duties,
and now the modern Dora Milaje are basically a Vibranium-toting secret service,
sworn to protect the current Black Panther at all costs.
That would be T’Challa,
who inherited the throne after his father T’Chaka’s murder.
The king’s death threw the country into chaos,
and T’Challa is taking the reins when the eyes of the world,
and the cosmos,
are centered squarely on his beloved kingdom.
He’s got a lot on his plate right now, so unless you’re a diplomat or you just won the Super Bowl,
I wouldn’t expect a personal audience on your visit.
Sorry Tom Brady, maybe next year.
T’Challa’s stepmother Queen Ramonda might be more available,
but his half-sister Shuri is probably gonna be busy in her workshop.
In the comics, she became a Black Panther of her own,
but she might still be a little young as far as the MCU is concerned.
Wait, which side of the road is it?
For Bast's sake, just drive!
Okay, calm down!
In the movie, she’s only 16, but that didn’t stop the brilliant scientist from coming up with the Panther’s awesome arsenal.
I have some new tech to show you. It is lighter, it absorbs energy, and it's got some swag.
And god knows he’s gonna need it, because ever since Wakanda entered the world stage,
it’s been a big target for evil assholes who want to exploit it.
It’s still one of the safest, most secure countries in existence,
but during your trip, it wouldn’t hurt to look over your shoulder for
Wakanda’s Most Wanted
The Panthers’ chief rival throughout the years was the White Gorilla cult,
a tribe that worshipped the albino apes who mutated when the Vibranium meteor hit.
After the Panthers took control, they outlawed White Gorilla worship,
but an ambitious warrior named M’Baku wasn’t going to take it lying down.
He killed one of the rare gorillas, ate its flesh and bathed in its blood,
which granted him similar powers to the Panthers’ Heart-Shaped Herb.
M’Baku is constantly plotting to usurp T’Challa’s kingdom,
but if was up to Ulysses Klaue, there wouldn’t even be a throne to take.
Klaw was one of the first Westerners to take in interest in Wakanda,
and by take an interest, I mean basically rob them for everything they have.
It came at great personal cost.
In the MCU, he might have lost his hand to a sass-talking robot with daddy issues,
"You're not my dad, Tony Stark!" Cuts off Klaw's hand.
I'm sorry, ooh, I'm sure that's gonna be okay.
but in the comics, T’Challa tore it apart after Klaw murdered his father.
He replaced it with a sonic-force blaster,
and eventually transformed his entire body into a living wall of sound.
Not exactly the smartest idea,
since Vibranium completely absorbs sound and his arch-nemesis is literally sitting on piles of it.
We’re not quite there in the movies yet,
So if you see a greasy-looking Andy Serkis around, outside of a mocap suit,
keep an eye on your traveler’s checks.
During the raid that killed T’Chaka,
Klaw had “help” from Wakandan tribesmen he forced to serve him.
A lot of them died in the attempt, including the father of a boy named N'Jadaka.
After the dust settled, T’Challa cast their whole family into exile.
It’s harsh, but that’s Wakandan justice.
N’Jadaka wound up in, where else, New York City, baybee,
where he changed his name to Erik Killmonger.
If you don't know I'm a villain, I'm gonna change my name to Killmonger, so you best respect me.
I'll put "Kill" in my last name so you know who's coming.
Killmonger grew up with a burning hatred for T’Challa,
and he swore revenge just as soon as he could graduate from MIT,
get jacked as heck,
and find his way back to Wakanda.
It is my responsibility to make sure that Wakanda does not fall into the hands of a person like you.
He’s out there, somewhere,
but as a tourist, I wouldn’t worry about him.
Within the borders of the kingdom, you’re under the Black Panther’s protection,
and he’s very good at his job.
Untouched and unconquered,
Wakanda is a jewel in the heart of Africa,
and it’s gonna take more than a few supervillains to shatter the kingdom.
Wakanda forever!!!
You can enjoy your trip, safe and free from fear,
as long as you play by the rules,
respect their religious customs,
and, y’know, don’t try to sneak out any Vibranium souvenirs.
Put it back.