Y'know, I've been hearing a lot about fake news recently.
and as somebody who's spent a lot of time on YouTube, I already know that everything is fake.
And the reason people fake news?
For the juicy ass views, boi.
If you can't report a good scoop that's gonna get you
lots of clicks, then ya just MAKE IT UP.
That's what pranksters have been doing for years,
and it's just now that the news media is starting to catch up.
I mean that could be why, after all,
CNN broadcasts PORN.
For 30 minutes STRAIGHT.
CNN, desperate and hungry for views!
It was reported all over the place, I mean,
this article that broke it has 50,000 shares.
It was on the front page of Reddit,
It was on Fox News,
It was on: The Independent, Drudge Report, Mashable,
The New York Post, The Daily Mail and Variety.
I can't believe that
CNN broadcast 30 minutes of trans porn.
Straight up.
Except, um, the one crazy thing about that story is that...
I don't know how to break this, but,
it actually didn't happen.
That was also a fake news. GOT YA.
GOT EM.
This started from one random guy.
Posting on Twitter "Uhhh @CNN is straight up porn right now... what happened"
One like.
And FROM THAT ONE TWEET,
It was covered by The Independent,
It got 50,000 shares,
and it was based on ONE FUCKING TWEET.
And in the two days that CNN
is trying to figure out what happened,
It's already been consumed by 20 million people.
And in the minds of the public,
it's already real at that point.
Now the original guys who broadcast this story,
It's so funny,
When they realized that they got it wrong,
and it didn't happen and they based their entire fuckin' scoop on ONE DAMN TWEET WITH ONE LIKE,
That's journalism, they're out there in the field scoopin' up the JUICIEST BITS!
They changed the headline.
Here's how they do this:
"CNN denies airing 30 minutes of hardcore porn"
It's like, YOU STARTED THE RUMOR.
You don't get to deny the rumor, YOU STARTED IT.
We're not acknowledging that maybe we got it wrong
and lied to... millions of people.
All I know is that they're denying it.
So it may still have happened,
and it's certainly not our fault.
News stations are essentially pranksters, at this point on YouTube.
Now a lot of these fake news articles are being
perpetuated and shown to people on Facebook,
on their new "news trending" tab.
Which shouldn't be any surprise to anyone
people on Facebook are notoriously gullible.
It all goes back to YouTube pranksters.
SoFlo ruined YouTube, left YouTube, came to Facebook,
and now SoFlo is ruining Facebook.
Look at this recent post by SoFlo. 33 million views,
"No veteran should be treated like this".
Share this video if you wanna support our troops.
One like saves one life.
One share equals... free Burger King for one veteran.
OH MY GOD.
This is like... the fakest, stupidest shit I have ever seen.
It makes me cringe.
You feel it in the pit of your stomach, right.
You feel it, it's like get you, it's like kidney disease.
I feel like I just got liver cancer or something watching that.
Now all of us, we've been on YouTube long enough,
We KNOW this is SoFlo antics.
This is just fake media.
And it's SO FAKE, it's SO STUPID.
But people are so eager to believe it's real
because it just confirms their beliefs
or plays to their baser emotions so they'll click that motherfucking like button.
But there's people out there, and I shit you not,
who actually have notifications on for SoFlo's page.
And 1.3 million people shared this, thinking,
"Oh yeah, that really happened."
We're living in a post-fact era,
where things are spread so fast,
that by the time it's already been consumed and proven fake, it's already held to be true.
The only tool we have against combatting these fake
news stories, gone wrong, gone sexual, gone buff, gone blowjob, is our minds.
You have to think for yourself.
Because the news... it's no longer safe.
I think that part of the problem is that
we've always held the news to this upheld standard
of facts and truthness.
But that doesn't exist anymore.
You gotta treat it like watching a Joey Salads video.
Think about it.
Does this make sense? Does this happen in a rational world?
Guys, hold on one sec.
I can't believe this shocking news coming in right now.
Apparently Trump just bought SoFlo entertainment!
What?
Apparently we have a quote from Trump:
Hold on, here, listen to this guys.
"I, Donald J. Trump, am officially announcing that SoFlo is my favorite Facebook page by far.
By far, very easily.
I would smash that motherfucking like button every time,
and also turn on notifications, they'd be so enabled.
I have to tell you.
He is, by far, the most reputable news source.
Far better than the crooked media.
Easily, folks, easily.
That is why I've decided to buy SoFlo for $20 billion.
SoFlo is so much better than Rosie, who's so fat and so disgusting, right?
I, your president, Donald J. Trump, am officially announcing
that I will kill Rosie O'Donnell by firing squad.
It's gonna take a lot of guns, folks, a lot of guns.
She is so disgusting.