[INTRO PLAYING]
[CHEERING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE]
THOMAS MORTON: Hi.
It's Thomas.
We're in the Peruvian Andes.
It's the day before Christmas.
All these guys are about to go beat the
shit out of each other.
It's called Takanakuy.
[CHEERING AND MUSIC IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE]
THOMAS MORTON: Takanakuy is a giant mass brawl that happens
every year at Christmastime in the Andes.
And the basic idea of Takanakuy is people build up
their grievances all year.
And then instead of them getting in
fights, they save it.
And on Christmas, everybody gets in a big
fight, and that's it.
It's like Yom Kippur but bloodier.
Takanakuy is exclusive to the Andean province of
Chumbivilcas.
The province's capital, Santo Tomas, is a murderous 10-hour
drive through the mountains from the nearest city.
We've been driving for eight hours.
The roads aren't, isn't the autobahn.
Altitude sickness is kind of combining with your general
car nausea in a fun way.
A bit of car sickness and a sore ass, however, seemed a
small price to pay to get to see an
entire town fight itself.
Chumbivilcas is sort of Peru's North Dakota.
It's pretty, filled with Indians, and poor as the dirt
they grow their potatoes out of.
Most guys here split town when they hit 16 to work in the
Andes' illegal gold mining industry.
Because it's pretty much that or chase
sheep around the mountain.
The indigenous population here claims descent from the Chanka
people, who not only resisted the Spanish when they invaded,
but the Incas before them.
The area is cut off from the rest of the country.
There's basically no police, no military presence, no
government services.
All of which plays into the local sense of defiance
against authority.
A lot of Chumbivilcans also speak the native Quechua
language instead of Spanish, which doesn't help so much
with the alienation.
VICTOR LAIME MANTILLA: [SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE]
THOMAS MORTON: I haven't been in a real fight
since middle school.
So I figured what better place to relearn the trade than a
town so testosterone-charged that they beat each other up
for Christmas.
We arrived a little before lunch to find festivities
already in full swing.
[MUSIC PLAYING]
THOMAS MORTON: The lead-up to the Takanakuy fights is a
week-long parade of drinking and dancing
through the town street.
Oh, this way.
This is kind the start of Takanakuy.
So what's happening right now is all these dudes in the
chaps and, like, the animal things on
their heads are fighters.
There's a big procession right now.
Through the town they're, like, banging on doors.
They're like, come out and fight basically.
The real gist of it is just that, like, everybody is kind
of coming together, playing some pretty
boss sounding music.
And pulling everyone out for the fight, which I think is
tomorrow morning.
[CHEERING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE AND PLAYING MUSIC]
THOMAS MORTON: I'm either a part of these guys tribe now,
or they're all going to beat me up tomorrow.
The traditional Takanakuy music is an indigenous genera
called huaylia.
The lyrics mostly deal with rebelling against authority.
And it's so devoid of any Latin or other Western
influences.
It sounds like Peking opera.
[MUSIC PLAYING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE]
THOMAS MORTON: Hualyia is played on an endless loop,
much like American Christmas music.
But doubly maddening because every huaylia song literally
uses the same chorus.
This is the same damn song.
This is the same song.
VICTOR LAIME MANTILLA: [SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE]
THOMAS MORTON: So we just got here this morning.
None of us have slept.
Been drinking a lot.
The altitude sickness is overpowering.
And we're dancing with a bunch of guys who look like things
I've seen on DMT.
MALE SPEAKER 1: [SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE]
THOMAS MORTON: Well, the costumes everyone wears fall
into five basic characters.
There's the majeno, who wears traditional horse riding gear
from the area.
[SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE]
THOMAS MORTON: Then there's the qarawatanna, who basically
takes the majeno and Mad Maxifies it with a biker
jacket and huge leather cowboy chaps that looks like Aeon
Flux boots.
Then they put a dead bird or a deer skull up top.
This looks pretty popular with the young guys.
Whose cap am I wearing?
Then you've got the negro, whose outfit's based not on
Negroes, but rather the kind of guy
who used to own Negroes.
So he's a slave master, basically.
[CHEERING]
THOMAS MORTON: And finally there's the langosta, which
means lobster in Spanish, but also locust.
In the 1940s, Chumbivilcas had a plague of locusts.
So the men naturally started dressing up as them to fight.
And the next year all the locusts left.
So that pretty much sealed langosta's place in the
Takanakuy pantheon.
[MUSIC PLAYING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE]
THOMAS MORTON: Of course, you can always just go q'ara
gallo, which means naked rooster.
Which means no costume.
Which basically means you're just drunk.
The one thing everybody wears is the traditional
Peruvian ski mask.
This dates back to the days when Takanakuy was the one
time a year you could beat up your boss, or the big town
land owner.
So disguising your identity was pretty key.
The voice they're supposed to use to fight people and
challenge people is this high-pitched falsetto thing.
[SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE IN FALSETTO]
THOMAS MORTON: There's nothing more terrifying than that, an
angry drunk dude with a ski mask talking to you like
Tweety Bird.
As fight time grew near, the atmosphere in town started
getting a little aggro.
MALE SPEAKER 2: [SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE]
MALE SPEAKER 3: [SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE]
VICTOR LAIME MANTILLA: [SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE]
MALE SPEAKER 4: [SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE]
VICTOR LAIME MANTILLA: [SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE]
MALE SPEAKER 4: [SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE]
THOMAS MORTON: After the third or fourth parade, I ran into a
couple of majenos practicing for the next day's fights.
So I asked them for some tips on fighting Takanakuy style.
OK.
So what should I do?
MALE SPEAKER 5: [SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE]
THOMAS MORTON: Kick that?
VICTOR LAIME MANTILLA: [SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE]
THOMAS MORTON: OK.
It might be the alcohol speaking, but I think I'm
getting pretty comfortable with it.
You try to kick as much as you can.
And then when you're in there, you just
pound a bunch of stuff.
I'm probably, you know, going to get my face broken.
But pretty fun.
[SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE]
THOMAS MORTON: In typical fashion, I left all my
Takanakuy shopping until the day before Christmas.
Oh, here we go.
So I had to hit the town quickly and put together an
outfit that wouldn't mark me as a total brain dead.
I went for a majeno with a light splash of qarawatanna
[INAUDIBLE], horse and eagle.
Give them a little horse, then I'll give them some eagle.
Just kidding.
He may have to grapple me.
Got the guns.
Got the toro.
Pretty solid.
This might be for kids.
Everything OK?
This is good right?
OK.
I think that's it.
I'm good.
All right.
I'm ready to go fight.
Fully outfitted for Christmas, I headed back to my hotel to
rest up for the big day.
CHILD: [SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE]
THOMAS MORTON: Morning.
Merry Christmas.
Last night we got in a firework fight in this hotel
room with the kid across the street whose parents own a
firework store.
So that was pretty dumb.
Oh, shit.
I haven't gotten too much rest.
Oh, fuck you, kids.
Damn it.
Ahh!
Feliz navidad.
Kids in Peru, man.
Let me get ready to go watch some fights.
Put on my jacket, ski mask.
All right.
Ready for some Takanakuy.
What do you think?
Oh.
That was rough.
[MUSIC PLAYING]
THOMAS MORTON: The mood in Santo Tomas on Christmas
morning is convivial and family friendly, especially in
light of the violence everyone's on their way to
watch and take part in.
This is the Takanakuy ring.
Everybody in masks you see is here to fight or be fought.
A lot of areas in the Peruvian and Bolivian Andes have
similar fighting festivals to Takanakuy.
What distinguishes them from Takanakuy, aside from
obviously not falling on Christmas, is in Chumbivilcas,
the whole village takes part--
guys, girls, old drunk men, even little kids.
[MUSIC PLAYING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE]
THOMAS MORTON: The fights are intense, but fairly orderly.
Punching and kicking is allowed.
But there's no biting or hair pulling or
hitting guys on the ground.
There are also amateur officials in the ring who
carry whips to make sure things don't get too one-sided
or out of hand and also to perform basic crowd control.
VICTOR LAIME MANTILLA: [SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE]
THOMAS MORTON: Things just got a little nasty.
[BREAKING UP FIGHT]
THOMAS MORTON: That just got way out of hand.
Dude picked up a rock and went after the other guy.
It's a little bit tense.
VICTOR LAIME MANTILLA: [SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE]
[MUSIC PLAYING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE]
THOMAS MORTON: This is the kiddie portion
of the fight now.
This guy looks like he's pushing six.
[CHEERING AND MUSIC PLAYING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE]
THOMAS MORTON: Is he crying?
That kid took a hard blow.
VICTOR LAIME MANTILLA: [SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE]
THOMAS MORTON: I don't think I've ever been in a place
where the idea of law seemed as--
kind of negligible.
There's obviously something a little incongruous about
watching children and old men pummel each other's faces to
meat on the Christian world's traditional day of peace.
At the same time, the second the fight's over, everybody's
all hugs and beers.
Which I feel captures the true spirit of Christmas.
At least better than getting drunk with relatives you don't
particularly care for.
Tomorrow, there's another Takanakuy in a village called
Llique that's sort of the real deal.
And that's where the fights are a lot harder, and where
everybody here who has a grievance that they didn't
solve in Takanakuy goes to, to like, really get it done.
We're going to go there.
And I'm going to fight some kid.
[MUSIC PLAYING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE]
THOMAS MORTON: Morning.
It's the day after Christmas.
We're in a van going to Llique.
This village is about 300 meters higher than Santo
Tomas, which means higher in the Andes.
We just passed like, cliffs sides that look like they're
out of Land of the Lost.
[MUSIC PLAYING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE]
THOMAS MORTON: The origins of Takanakuy
are a little nebulous.
The festival's name derives from the rein of Tupac Amaru,
the last Incan king to resist the Spanish conquest.
But there's widespread debate as to when the practice
actually started.
And whether it has more to do with indigenous rebellion or
with Spanish duelling traditions introduced under
colonialism.
[MUSIC PLAYING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE]
THOMAS MORTON: We're just going to Llique.
The festivities here have been kind of going
on for a few days.
There's been dancing, everybody's been drinking.
It's a bit of a scene already.
Hey, hey, what's up?
Que pasa?
MALE SPEAKER 6: [SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE]
THOMAS MORTON: [SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE]
THOMAS MORTON: Yeah.
It's like what, 9:00 in the morning.
There's like 4 or 5 beer bottles at those guys feet.
Everybody's dancing their way into the church.
[PLAYING MUSIC]
THOMAS MORTON: Looks like a nice little
church breakfast scene.
It's kind of weird.
Everybody's wearing what look like devil masks.
But I guess that says something to the fluidity of
religious thought up here.
[CROWD SINGING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE]
THOMAS MORTON: Up in Llique, the huaylia music was still
fucking going.
VICTOR LAIME MANTILLA: [SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE]
THOMAS MORTON: The dancing up here is a little less ornate
than down below, a little less bird-like.
But that may be the result of them partying
for like three days.
[MUSIC PLAYING]
THOMAS MORTON: Beats normal Sunday services.
VICTOR LAIME MANTILLA: [SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE]
THOMAS MORTON: That was a pretty brief service.
I kind of liked that.
Let's see where they're going now.
[MUSIC PLAYING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE]
THOMAS MORTON: After a few more drinks, it was finally
time to head to the town center and watch the fights.
This village has like 300 people in it.
But on Takanakuy day, it goes to 3,000 because everybody
comes in here.
Because these are the guys who are the best
fighters in the region.
Which is cool because we want to see some good fights, but
not so hot for me because I have to fight one of them.
[MUSIC PLAYING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE]
THOMAS MORTON: It's like a Roman Colosseum, replete with
like dudes with whips.
It was pretty clear from the get-go that Llique's
reputation is well earned.
Even the kids' fights here were a million times more
intense than the ones in Santo Tomas.
[CHEERING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE]
THOMAS MORTON: Someone was showing me how to wrap this
until we got whipped by a guy who was pretty rude.
This is the guy I'm fighting.
He owns a pet eagle, has two girlfriends, and rides a
motorcycle.
He's also taller than me, and he has long hair.
I'm not looking forward to this fucking fight.
Jose was fighting a rival before me, which gave me the
opportunity to see what I was up again.
And hopefully get a little handicap
courtesy of said rival.
I'm starting to freak out.
My bowels just clenched, man.
So I haven't had any training for this.
I don't think my opponent has either, but I'm pretty sure my
opponent's life is training.
[MUSIC PLAYING]
THOMAS MORTON: You ready?
OK, this is it.
Oh, fuck.
I got nailed.
[INTERPOSING VOICES]
THOMAS MORTON: I may not have won the fight or come anywhere
close, or at any point look like I ever could have, but
all the townspeople seemed pretty psyched to watch a
gringo fight and lose.
So at least I gave them that.
[MUSIC PLAYING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE]
THOMAS MORTON: Truthfully, as far as makeshift justice
systems go, Takanakuy's got a lot going for it, especially
compared to our courts.
Their turnover rate for cases is extraordinarily quick.
The results are immediate and satisfying for the winners.
And if you've got a problem with them, you can always go
back in the ring for an appeal.
The rest of Peru may look down on Takanakuy as a symptom of
rural backwardness, but while they're sitting in a lawyer's
office filling out reams of paperwork, the plaintiffs of
Chumbivilcas already have their arm around the
defendant's shoulder and are drowning
their problems in beer--
not a bad way to spend a Christmas.
[MUSIC PLAYING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE]
THOMAS MORTON: Still dancing.
[MUSIC PLAYING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE]