In our quest to make food videos in Japan,
we need to also kind of learn how to make the food
so that we could better appreciate it.
So today, we're with a soba master who's gonna teach us how to make soba,
so in the future we know what makes a good soba or a bad soba.
*music*
Soba noodles, unlike chubby white udon noodles,
are made from a combination of buckwheat flour and wheat flour.
The buckwheat gives it a nutty taste and a bouncier bite,
but it also means it's harder to make than a normal wheat based noodle.
Today we are learning how to make one of the hardest types of soba:
NI-HACHI SOBA! *battle music*
And it's made with a ratio of 20% wheat flour to 80% buckwheat.
*Sensei Ito speaks in Japanese*
*continues in Japanese*
Good thing they provided a translator with his lesson.
Cause I'd be totally lost.
Well now that we listened to those instructions
I'm sure that we memorized them and we will follow them, perfectly.
Time to execute the perfect soba!
This is gonna be easy!!!
Totally!!!
It's not gonna turn out like the shape of all wrong and...lumpy... *cries*
I'm gonna fail in front of a master T.T
Get yourself together Martina.
*slap*
Okay!
Step one:
sneeze in the bowl.
No Simon, that's not part of it!
*Music*
Easy...
(whispers) Oh...
*Fail music*
I already messed up -
already.
This is the easiest part guys,
This is the easiest part and it's the most exhausting part already...
*yelps*
I haven't started kneading...
Captain's log:
*pants*
I'm exhausted.
Whew!
This does kill your back!
Whoa!
Aaaarrrgh!
I'm trying to sit down.
Martina: Come on, Simon.
Aaahhhh!
I could sit!
Oh my god!
Do they have a couch here or something?
Feels like they will never join together!
Feels like these are all their own little planets.
With every push their has to be an explosion.
*Explosion sound*
Ooooh my god!
Deadlifts yesterday.
Why did I do deadlifts yesterday???
Could've done anything else...
You knew you had to shoot in advance,
and decided to do deadlifts?!
Watching Star Trek on the couch alone,
why would I do that yesterday?!
It was so tough!
Made myself a cosmo...
Star Trek Next Gen...
*Sensei Ito instructs in Japanese*
This is a really bad angle,
it just looks like from this angle:
"What you want gurl?"
"What you want?"
Don't look at this angle on the camera.
*grunting noises*
This is a terrible camera angle.
Should have thought better about it.
Yeah... Play some inappropriate music right now.
You like that don't you?
*Simon continues*
*Crickets*
Just a little bit more until you get nice and hard.
You like that?
Like the pounding you gettin?
Should've brought a tripod...
Definitely...
Shoulda brought a tripod...
*Explosion noise*
*Explosion noises*
Sensei Ito: Ooooh!
OHH YEAAAAH!!!
Martina: Ah~~~
That's what you're doing, I get to do...
Simon: How do we know when I'm ready?
Martina: Okay, okay, okay...
It was a bad one...
Martina: Oh no~
Dan: Doing really well Simon.
I am.
Okay.
And now we roll?
*Sad voice* Mine looks lumpy.
So I made it into this shape right here, right now.
I'm ready for the next step.
...
I don't remember the next step.
What's the next step?
Mine looks crappy :(
Belly button!!
*Pirate voice* Eeeeeeeeeeeaaaaahhhhh!!!
Now that we finished flattening it out,
we put it in plastic bags so it could stay dry,
now we gotta clean out the bowl.
*music*
So the next step
is I have to mush this out
to 30 centimeters.
Gotta get it...
...to 30 centimeters.
It's not long enough yet...
Gotta make it a little bit longer.
Soon as I got it
I was like "Oh just push it down,"
and I went like "Pppccckkkaaaaahhhh!"
And then this is the area that's kind of like
a bit torn.
Simon: 29!
Almost there!
29...
*panting and dying*
29...
Simon: 30!
Pull it out.
*excited noises*
Has to be 30 centimeters.
Haaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhh!!!! Yeah!!!!!!!!
*Dothraki man warrior roar* THIRTY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
So the next part what you're supposed to do is
with the rolling pin,
you don't roll with your hands
you're supposed to put your nails on
and you're supposed to
rub it together like this.
And after every seven rolls,
you're supposed to turn it
fifteen degrees.
He wound up telling me
that mine is getting a bit deformed.
because,
my right arm is a lot stronger than my left arm..
I don't know x2
I don't know why that would be...
*Old woman voice* Uuuuuuuhhhmmmm...
I miss the hair on my knuckles...
When you do this, and you rub it,
You just basically
sear off all the skin hair.
So Dan...
a little bit of Martina knuckle hair in there...
*Sensei Ito comments in Japanese*
Martina: Nice?
Martina: Okay......
So an important step that I'm learning is that
you have to check the sides
to make sure that each of them is the same width.
I had one that was thicker here and one that was thinner here
so he's helping me right now with trying to even out the edges.
I could hear the sound of a father's disappointment in his son...
You know that voice that they use?
When a...
When you've really disappointed...
your parents :(
Yup.
*Martina sings to her dough*
Simon: One more.
Ooohh!!!
*Martina's singing escalates*
I'm glad he's here for this part
because when I saw him doing it himself
I knew this was the part I was gonna mess up.
Sensai Ito: Ton, ton, ton...
Is it important to say "ton, ton, ton, ton?"
*Japanese instructions*
Simon: Yup!
Oooooooooooohhhhhh,
I messed up bad...
This has to be
in a perfectly square shape so that
when it's folded over, when you cut all the noodles
it'll be even.
Because I've got more of like a...
rhombus-y kind of
circle meets a squid shape going on,
the noodle cutting might not be all too great.
If Simon was his grandson,
he would have received a strong beating by now.
If I was his grandson, I would be written out of the will for this.
So Dan, you should be able to
pick Simon's out from mine
based on which one's fatter and thinner.
Which one's tastier!
Has more love!
And spirit!
Martina: Mine! Cause I was like talking to it.
You have to whisper to your food when you make it.
Although Simon was whispering...
His soba might be pregnant, I'm not sure, but...
So
this is supposed to be all
evenly
squared.
Instead, I've got all of this empty
and all of this empty.
I messed this up
really
bad...
He can't even look me in the eye anymore...
Now he just like casts his head down
and walks over to his favorite child.
So the rules of this knife:
you're supposed to keep your hand right up against
the blade, like here.
And when you push down,
you angle left.
So you don't slide the blade
You just push, angle, push, angle.
On the cutting board
you're only supposed to have three fingers lightly.
Don't mush it down or else
you just won't have any noodles.
You'll have, a, noodle.
aaaaannnnddd....
Push,
left.
Whaat?!
I've cut my first soba noodle!
That's way too thick isn't it?
Probably.
Yes?
*Translator instructs Simon*
Try to aim ONE MILLIMETER?!!?!
Who can aim ONE millimeter?!
*BAMF music*
How about we go for five?
...alright, here we go.
Three fingers
Pop! Pop!
*fail music*
I'm f*cked
I'm prope...
I'm proper f*cked.
There's like a really delicate movement,
when you move the knife.
When you put it down,
you just basically do this.
And you nudge the board over a tiny bit.
But you'll like do a little bit more
and then you nudge it too much
and then you cut it down
and then you get this
god forsaken giant noodle.
Uggggghhhhhh
Oh my god
It's so bad!
So the master said,
If you cut it too big, you're just supposed to say:
you like big noodles. So you know what? I like big noodles!
I don't want baby noodles...
I want MAN noodles.
Oh this is just getting uglier and sadder...
Martina: Slow down. Look you're angling this weird.
This is going off on an angle.
Simon: No, because there's no more density.
That's... There's just no noodle there.
Mine didn't form into a square like yours.
Martina: Mine has some pretty bad corners.
Simon: Mine looked like an empty baby blanket...
Da daaaaa!!!
Our noodles are done.
I'm actually surprised that something came out of this.
This might actually be edible!
It looks not that bad!!!
No!!!
So mine are on the right here.
Mine are the big boy noodles.
And Martina has the thin ones right there...
I didn't do a great job at chopping,
but, because I rolled it so thin,
you can tell there's a difference between the two.
Together: Okay!
Here we go!
Itadakimasu~~
So you're only supposed to dip half of it.
But I'm not sure how to grab half because
Martina: Oh my god...
Some of ours are...
None of these are even...
Okay, these are kind of-
Ok here we go. I'm just gonna go for it!
Oh my god, these are totally uneven.
I can see it.
*slurping sounds*
I have a feeling some will be cooked
It's actually not bad!!!
The taste is good,
but they're definitely uneven... *Cries*
Holy smokes!
Let me try yours.
I am now a soba master.
...I don't know about that.
Okay.
I can immediately tell though,
that when you dip it in and you try to eat it,
some pieces are perfectly cooked
because this teacher himself was telling us
that he has to cook them longer than normal
because ours are so, basically,
chunky.
But do you see how some are soft
and some are a bit like harder?
That's what happens when we're uneven.
After working on this,
for nearly four hours...
on a totally empty stomach
this is the most delicious soba I've ever had in my entire life.
I'm gonna try your soba now.
Ooohh it's so heavy!!!
Aaah, I can't lift this sobaa...
Some big boy soba right here.
Simon starts his new uh...
brand of soba.
Oh my gosh. I am so happy to eat this!
This is such a wonderful experience!
It's a little bit intimidating when you're doing it
and you're messing it up,
but to see this final product, is so deeply satisfying.
To be honest, yours taste really good too.
Dan
Who's soba do you like more?
Dan: Huh?
Yeah, Dan.
Mine or Martina's?
*Scary music*
You have to choose between the two of us.
*Scary music continues*
Who's do you like more Dan?
Dan: Just on the look?
Who do you love more, your mother or your father?
Dan: MMMmmm~~~
*Scary music*
Pick, Dan.
*Slurps*
Simon: K, which one do you like more?
Martina: A or B?
Simon: A or B? First one or the second one?
Definitely B.
*Martina goes berserk*
Simon: Definitely B is the worst one is what you said?
Dan: Hmm?
Simon: B was the worst one, yes?
No, no. B was the best.
*Martina flailing about*
Why?
I could tell.
These are-
These are so BIG!
Thank you so much to Ito-san
for sharing his soba making skills with us.
This was an amazing experience.
I think we have to come back again to make sure we get it right though...
If you guys are interested in booking
a lesson as well with Ito-San
Click the link in our info box below
and you too, can become a soba master!
Seriously!
I learned how to make soba today.
I know.
This is amazing.
And I learned the history of soba.
Like I feel a huge appreciation towards it
waaaay more than I did before.
*sighs*
I'm gonna keep eating because
Simon's about to consume all the soba.
Simon: MMMmm~