My story is the American story.
It just happens that I'm Michelle Obama,
the former First Lady, that people may pick it up.
But maybe why they finish it
is because they see themselves in it.
- I'm here today to speak with... - ...Michelle Obama.
- ...about her book. - My heart is racing.
- I am so excited. - We're gonna breathe the same air.
- It's gonna be... - ...Just amazing.
( music playing )
- I brought a friend with me. - All: Oh!
You've had a huge range of readers for this book.
And I wonder what the kind of core takeaway
or message you hope audiences would have,
or you feel like audiences have had.
The little bitty journeys that I take you through in my life,
that little Michelle Robinson that you fall in love with,
you know, everyone has those stories,
and that's what tells people who I am.
It's not the eight years in the White House.
that's like-- that just sort of happened to--
and then I was First Lady.
But let me tell you what really helps you understand who I am.
It's those stories about my Aunt Robbie.
It's understanding how we celebrated birthdays.
Those stories give us all a wider insight into each other.
And I hope that, as a country, as a people, as a world,
that we start appreciating the diversities of our stories,
and understanding that that's what makes us human,
that's what makes us American, that's what makes us real.
Yeah, that was one of the things I really loved about the book.
It felt the whole time like I was meeting a real person
who had a specific story, and all the resonant details.
Coming from a working class family,
a lot of black women who come from economically disadvantaged families
tend to think that their families can't do anything for them.
We're kind of ashamed of coming from where we come from.
And so seeing all the ways that your family,
within their means, really did support you
and really kind of helped you develop into yourself is really important.
Well, and that's the point. "Within their means."
My brother and I were talking on the airplane,
and we're like, the least thing that was important to us was stuff.
It was the love.
It was the unconditional support.
It was the having your back in small ways,
and that doesn't have a salary cap on it.
I understood how valuable it was
not to live in a big house, not to drive a nice car,
but to have parents and a family who loved me.
And that's the message to a lot of parents out there.
If you have love and honesty and values to bring,
that is the most important thing you can give a child.
I know that's why the story spoke to me,
and someone that you look up to, to hear their challenges
and to hear where they came from
and to see them as a full person
and not someone that you're putting on a pedestal is so important.
What I told the publishers that I understood about this book was that,
do you know how rare it is that a living African American woman
from a working class community
gets to write her story in a way that will be read?
That doesn't happen,
so the stories that we hear that tell us what it means to be human,
what it means to be American,
they all have looked like a white male
that has come from a wealthy background
and has become successful.
So all of us start to think that, well,
"My little story doesn't mean anything."
But that's what makes us all connected to each other.
Kat?
Was there anything about the process
of writing and recording the audiobook
that was unexpected or particularly memorable?
I loved my process.
The raw emotions of coming out exhausted.
I needed to say it. I needed to have it heard,
and then I could process it.
That was surprisingly therapeutic
in a way that I didn't expect.
One thing that really spoke to me was how important it is
to block out those critics and naysayers,
and I think that's something we all struggle with,
especially because of social media.
( all laugh )
I talk to my kids about this all the time.
What do I do? I turn it off.
- ( John groans ) - It's-- it's like--
( laughs ) Wait, wait, what?
Ya can't read it.
I always say this. It's like, "You would never
stand in the middle of the town square
and let people spit on you."
No one in their right mind would just show up
and be like, "Okay, world, just spit on me."
Because that's what's happening.
It's like, people are just spitting. They don't know why.
They don't know you.
You can't read that stuff.
It's like, I want to take your hand...
I needed you to tell me this to make it real.
And now it's real.
Stop reading that stuff.
Did you ever have moments where you're, like--
felt yourself holding back in the writing process?
- Oh, God, yeah, yeah. - So many times?
Oh, yeah. The goal was just to get it all out there.
- Yeah. - The first test was when I had my husband read the--
'cause I wouldn't let him look at anything.
'Cause he was like, "Can I see the first draft?"
"No! Get out of here."
I didn't want anybody's opinions or their worries
to cloud it until it was out.
And Sasha still hasn't read it.
( all laugh )
She was like, "I'm getting to it, Mom.
I'm a senior." Well, you know. That would be Sasha.
The stuff about me, I didn't care--
You know, I was like, "Here. Here it is. Here I am."
But when it involved other people,
I wanted to make sure they were comfortable with it,
and once they were comfortable with it, I was like, "Let's do it."
I actually discuss a lot with my audience
about how when we prioritize intimate partnerships,
we really do a disservice to how bountiful
other relationships in our life can be.
- Yeah. - So what I appreciate is how you do acknowledge
the diverse range of relationships you've had in your life.
I was always the kid who loved a posse, you know?
My little girl group.
And sometimes all you need
is to be heard by people who care about you.
Love is shown by being there.
Dinners, and it's birthday cakes, it's presents.
I learned going to college that when you're out of your comfort zone,
that the first thing you need to do is build your own community.
You do need your posse.
And nothing replaces the human connection
that we get from our friendships, aside from our partners.
And I love my husband.
But there are times I need to go to my friends
- to talk about my husband. - Yes, very important.
And then I went home and I was like, "Oh, you're not so bad."
I wonder if that's why the book is resonating with so many people.
People are recommending it to their friends and family,
and I wonder if it's because it's such a deep celebration of community
and of supporting one another.
This is why I stay hopeful,
because I've gotten to really travel the country.
I'm actually meeting people, and that's something we don't do.
We don't experience each other. We hear about each other.
My story is the American story.
It just happens that I'm Michelle Obama, the former First Lady,
that people may pick it up.
But maybe why they finish it is because they see themselves in it.
John's final question.
We've received a bunch of questions about how emotional the book is.
I wonder how you were able to control your emotions
as you were writing, or were you able to?
Like, did you have to go to those places,
to the place of deep grief, to the place of great joy, to the place of fear...
- Yes. Yes. Yes, yes. - ...while you were writing?
The chapter where I go through the dehumanization.
I was like, I want every negative thing that was said written,
because I want people to remember that this happened to me.
The woman who's an icon, or whatever you want to call me,
but I think it was important for people
to fall in love with that little girl, Michelle,
then take her through that period
where you feel like they don't even know her, right?
And you can only go there if I go there, right?
But if you can get through it, it's like,
well, then, we can get through it.
- Yeah. - Well, but it's also a cautionary tale
of see how quickly we demonize people we don't know?
- Yeah. - There is a deep fundamental flaw in us
when we don't know each other.
And when others are trying to use fear
as a way to gain control.
So it's easy to treat that immigrant
or to generalize or to see that gay kid.
Because you don't know their story.
That's why I say in the book, "It's harder to hate up close."
So, let's let each other in a bit more.
That's wonderful.
I think we have to stop there, unfortunately.
Thank you so, so much, both for taking the time to talk with us today.
- Yeah, thank you guys. - But also for your extraordinary book,
which we all loved so, so much.
( music playing )
( Michelle Obama reading )
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