HONEST TRAILER : AMAZING SPIDERMAN
NARRATOR This summer, witness yet another Spiderman
origin story...
NARRATOR (CONT'D) Just so SONY can retain the rights to the
character...
NARRATOR (CONT'D) Peter Parker was just an attractive...
NARRATOR (CONT'D) Intelligent...
NARRATOR (CONT'D) Likeable...
NARRATOR (CONT'D) Athletic...
NARRATOR (CONT'D) Well-dressed...
NARRATOR (CONT'D) Teenaged loser.
NARRATOR (CONT'D) But when he easily walks into a high security
lab, one radio-active spider bite will give
NARRATOR (CONT'D) Peter the ability to...
NARRATOR (CONT'D) Twitch like a crackhead...
NARRATOR (CONT'D) Break everything...
NARRATOR (CONT'D) Get every father figure in his life murdered...
NARRATOR (CONT'D) Act like a complete jerk every chance he gets.
PETER "I just did eighty percent of you your job...
Huh!?"
AUNT MAY "Who does this to you?"
PETER "Please, please go to sleep!"
NARRATOR And studder worse than Shia Labuef in Transformers.
PETER "Uhm so uh you want to uh, I don't know
uhm."
PETER (CONT'D) "I don't know."
PETER (CONT'D) "Just uh."
PETER (CONT'D) "Uhm, I don't know"
PETER (CONT'D) "I was, I was, dah."
PETER (CONT'D) "Yea, yea."
PETER (CONT'D) "No, no, no, no, no."
GWEN STACY "I don't want to talk about that."
PETER "Don't, don't, no, no, OK no, OK?"
PETER (CONT'D) "OK, OK, OK, OK, OK."
PETER (CONT'D) "I gotta tell you this one thing. I gotta
PETER (CONT'D) "Ike , I wish I could just..."
NARRATOR Embark on a romantic journey...
where the hottest girl in school falls for this creep stalker
UNCLE BEN "He's got you on his computer."
PETER "Pfeheh."
NARRATOR Proving that love always prevails, even when
you have gaping wounds that require
NARRATOR (CONT'D) immediate medical attention...
NARRATOR (CONT'D) Immerse yourself in the epic battle, between
a hero who refuses to fight with his mask on.
NARRATOR (CONT'D) And a villain, with the most cliche origin
story imaginable...
NARRATOR (CONT'D) Who is conveniently connected to the most
important people in Peter's life.
UNCLE BEN "Curt Conners, that's the name of the
guy in the picture with your dad."
CAPTAIN STACY "Dr. Curtis Conners, was also my daughters
mentor, is that who your talking about?"
PETER PARKER "That's the one."
NARRATOR Experience the re-retold story...
NARRATOR (CONT'D) ...of an uncle who strives to find yet another
way of saying "With great power, comes great responsibility.
UNCLE BEN "That if you could do good things for other
people, you would have a moral obligation to do those things.
UNCLE BEN (CONT'D) "That's what's at stake here. Not choice...
responsibility."
NARRATOR As well as all these other moments...
NARRATOR (CONT'D) that you've already seen before...
NARRATOR (CONT'D) Like this...
NARRATOR (CONT'D) A lot of this...
NARRATOR (CONT'D) And more of this.
PETER PARKER "Call an ambulance!"
NARRATOR Swing along, with the smartest teenager in
Manhattan...
NARRATOR (CONT'D) Who uses the myspace of search engines....
NARRATOR (CONT'D) And does a terrible job of hiding his secret
identity.
NARRATOR (CONT'D) Seriously nobody thought that was odd?
NARRATOR (CONT'D) Starring...
NARRATOR (CONT'D) The Not Really That Amazing Spider
NARRATOR (CONT'D) Merr, at least Kirsten Dunst wasn't in it.
NARRATOR (CONT'D) Don't miss our future Honest Trailers, subscribe
now...
NARRATOR (CONT'D) And leave a comment like to hear me say in
my epic voice...