Hi there, I'm Angela Oberer and today's good idea comes from Kendra. She writes in and says:
First of all, be the first to apologize.
Whenever you get in an argument, whenever you get in a fight, be the first one to apologize.
If you wait for the other person to apologize, you might be waiting forever right?
So if you're the first one to apologize, you can start the forgiveness process, you get
that off your chest, and you're free to move on and live happily ever after.
What happens to the other person, I have no idea.
They might apologize, they might try to mend the friendship or relationship, or they might
choose to hold a grudge and be ugly for the rest of their life. I have no idea.
But be the first to apologize any time you come into an argument.
Second of all - When there is an argument and emotions are
running high, and there's tension, and there's frustration, and people are slinging stuff
back and forth at each other, which probably can't ever be taken back, slow down.
When I was learning drivers ed, and I was learning to drive my dad took me out in the
car for a test drive. And as we came up around a great big curve,
My dad turned to me, I was going about 70 miles per hour. And he could have said lots
of things, he could have cussed at me, he could have said "WHOA" or he could have said
"STOP" or something, he could have said anything, but what he did was, he turned to me quietly
and he said: "You don't want to take that curve at 70 miles per hour."
Ooh. And I slowed down. Okay, there's danger at 70 miles per hour.
In an argument, that danger is saying things that cannot be taken back.
Okay? There's danger at 70 miles per hour. Now there's not a day that goes by that I
haven't thought of that. "You don't want to take that curve at 70 MPH"
And if you're in the middle of an argument, slow down.
Listen, and watch, but don't say things you can't take back.
Life is too short, and you'll spend the rest of your life apologizing.
So be the first to apologize, and then when you talk to your mother-in-law slow down.
I'm telling ya, that might save your relationship, and it's a good idea.
It's a good idea.