[sports theme music]
Tonight on SportsNoise! Our returning champion faces off against a total newbie.
That's right, Frank. Our first-timer here is Susan.
She's sweet, real awkward on her feet, and always cries herself to sleep.
Wait - is that - that's not my intro, is it? The crying to sleep thing? Should I respond to that or - ?
And Susan's really going to have to step it up tonight in this mental game against our returning champ: Anxiety.
This guy gives me the creeps, Jim.
I'm with you there, Frank. But man - look at that hair.
It is great hair, Jim.
Yeah, I’m gonna get inside her head like I always do. Throw some content at her. You know how she
eats up that content. Man, just chows down on that content. And then cries herself to sleep.
Okay, did I sign off on some like “crying to sleep” storyline?
Cause that happened like one time - it happens to a lot of people.
- That Susan's a real pill. - She sure is, Jim. Let's see how this all shakes out courtside.
Sometimes our worries feel small and manageable. Other times, they feel like huge battles being played out
in front of 20,000 people. Whatever the situation is, the first thing you can do is externalize your worries.
Personify them as Anxiety.
[grunting]
One sec.
[grunting]
- Done? - Yeah.
So we talked about doing the opposite of what Anxiety needs: willingly seek out discomfort.
Welcome the worry, the doubt, the awkwardness, whatever comes up. Cause if you push them away -
- Oh, I love when you push them away. - Then those feelings get stronger.
- But if you welcome them... - Which is just plain stupid. - ...then you’re already winning.
A lot of these people are just waiting for you to fall flat on your face.
I notice, and I welcome it.
I am worried about embarrassing myself. True. Thank you. ... And then I go back to stretching.
Hey, I saw your mom and dad in the stands over there.
Just thought you might be worried about letting them down since you never really lived up to their expectations.
So I can ignore him and keep doing what I’m doing - or, if that doesn’t work, I can ask him to give me more.
I can say: Wow, thanks Anxiety. Kind of feel like I’m gonna vomit right now.
But it’s not really doing it for me yet. You wanna turn it up a bit?
And then I move on.
- You’ve changed. - You bet your ass I have.
You have so many options. You can respond like you’re excited - like he’s telling you
exactly what you wanted to hear - or like maybe it was too weak and you want more.
- You. Yeah, you. Gimme some sugar. - You have the body of a 16-year-old boy.
OUCH! YES! That’s exactly what I needed to hear. Thanks, buddy.
HEY! Stop messing with our thing!
Here’s the gist: I’m not replying to the content. I’m not trying to get rid of the worries.
I’m just doing the opposite of what he wants. That’s it. I’m gonna encourage him. Applaud him.
Give him an award for “Best Worry.” Whatever. And then I go back to what I was doing.
Let's do this.
Susan seems surprisingly optimistic.
Very surprising, Frank. Let's see if she can keep up that paradoxical approach on the court.
First set. Anxiety to serve. Love all.
- I warned you. - Bring it on, man.
So. What happens if you lose?
Nice! This is what I want!
[crowd cheers and applauds] Love-15.
All right, all right, calm down. Hey, I know the oven’s off. What about the stove!
- I like it! Give me ANOTHER! - Come on!
[crowd applauds] - Love-30. - You can do better.
Careful what you wish for. What if you’re single FOREVER?
- Hey, at least I’m dating. - 15-30.
Oh, Susan was on a roll there. Content is not her strong suit.
- She just eats up that content. - She certainly does.
That was good. I slipped back into content. Ain’t gonna happen again.
Someone’s looking a little red in the cheeks. What’s wrong? Feeling a little embarrassed?!
Maybe you’re right. Why don’t you make them super red? Come on, make it WORSE!
Oww!
[crowd cheers] 15-40. Game point.
Uh-oh. Game point. Time to pull out the big guns.
I didn’t want to bring this up in front of your disapproving parents, but what if you never do anything with your life?!
- Is that all you’ve GOT?
[crowd roars] - Damn it! - YES! Eat it! Wooo!
HORSERADISH!
This is how you win with Anxiety: As crazy as it seems, do the opposite of what he wants.
Seek out uncertainty. Beg for more. The more outrageous you can be, the more you’ll succeed.
- That was on the line! ON the LINE! - And, yeah, he’ll probably be back for a rematch in a minute.
- UNACCEPTABLE! - But until then, I’ll just go back to doing what I was doing.
[crowd cheers] Thank you! I've never played tennis before!
Oh, yeah. Like it means ANYTHING!