By the end of this video,
I'm going to give you five and you need to stay till the end because the best one is saved for last.
Hey there, I'm a Rebecca Zung.
I'm an attorney.
I'm also a narcissist negotiation expert and in these videos and on this channel,
I give you sneaky secrets to make sure that you can shift
the dynamic and become the most powerful person
in the room against narcissist, against anyone.
So that you can feel that you are empowered in any negotiation
and if that sounds good to you, make sure that you subscribe
and hit that notification bell.
Okay.
So let's talk about sneaky secrets that you can use in any negotiation
but especially against narcissist
and what I say is, if you can negotiate against narcissist
is you can negotiate against anyone.
The bottom line is when you're negotiating,
all people want to feel like they've come away with some value.
The thing is no one's going to settle for their worst day.
All people want to feel seen,
heard and acknowledged
and that's why my book
negotiate like you matter
is called negotiate like you matter
and matter is actually the acronym for my methodology in that book and m stands
for My value is defined by me
because you and you alone to find your value.
Value can be internal or external meaning that
you have internal value which is whole and complete and fixed.
You know, we are all valuable
as human beings and then there's
the external value which is kind of defined by the
market and all that sort of thing,
you know, based on your skills and how much experience you have and all that sort of thing.
But as human beings,
we are all intrinsically valuable
but there are it's sneaky negotiation secrets that we can use to kind of win any
negotiation based on just how you approach a negotiation.
So that everybody feels like they're getting somewhere
because if you want to get somewhere,
you want to make sure that everybody is being acknowledged.
So just thinking of it from that perspective
and especially when you're dealing with narcissists
because remember they don't have any internal sense of value.
They don't have that internal feeling that they have.
They're trying to constantly layer it from the external.
So you got to think about that as well.
Alright.
The ones that are more hotly contested
and the reason why you do that is
because that way you feel like you've got some common ground.
That way you feel like you're building some momentum.
Like you're getting somewhere.
Okay, you know, we've already agreed on these things.
Look, you know, burn the bridge already.
Why throw the whole thing away.
Look at how much we’ve already gained.
A lot of times, like it's all WOW,
We've already agreed on 99% of everything.
It's just these last couple of things.
You know, why blow the whole deal on just these last couple of things.
So you pretty much can like, wrap it up because
you've agreed on most everything else.
So you start with areas of agreement
then you work up toward the more hotly contested areas.
Okay, because that way you feel like you've gained a lot of ground, right?
Sometimes that's a way of letting them feel like they've got some control,
especially when you're dealing with narcissist.
When you're dealing with somebody who is
a more toxic or more volatile personality.
It gives them some feeling like they got somewhere right out of the gate
and a lot of times actually, it helps you because
you get to see where they're coming from.
You get to see what's most important to them.
So you get to see where their cards are.
It educates you honestly, it helps you.
So let the other person start with the first offer.
So that's number two.
Let the other person start with the first offer.
Let them have some control right out of the gate.
This is kind of a tricky one though
because you also don't want to start with
so much more that the other person goes.
I'm out of here. That's ridiculous.
If it's so offensive that the other person just
thinks they're just wasting my time
and they just are out of there then you totally blown the deal.
So you have to be careful about how much a lot more is.
I mean, obviously you want to ask
for more than what you want especially
because sometimes people really do have to be beat up by the process.
I think this is tough for people sometimes, you know,
they think, well, I'm just going to be reasonable right out of the gate.
I just want to be done with this thing.
Let me just show them that I'm being reasonable.
Let me just show them that I'm giving up all this
and if I give up all of this right away,
they're going to see how much I'm giving up.
They're going to see how reasonable I am
and a lot of times if you're dealing with a narcissist,
they just take take take
and that just gets taken and they don't acknowledge that
and they just want, you know,
to keep going with that and that just got gets
shoved to the side and not even acknowledged at all
and you end up feeling frustrated
and taken advantage of
I would just be very very careful about that.
I do have another whole video on
psychological tricks to win
any negotiation especially against narcissist
and I would definitely check out my video on that.
Because if you tell them what you actually want,
they will definitely go directly for that
and especially just to get back at you
and again, you know, check out my video on the psychological tricks to win any negotiation.
So be careful about that, you know, the bottom line is,
sometimes you just have to take your ego out of it,
you know, because they do just want to get back at you
and the thing is, you just want to get to a resolution.
You just want to get to yes.
If you are a reasonable person,
narcissist just want to jerk you around.
They don't necessarily want to just get to yes.
They just want to continue to manipulate you and see you squirm.
If you're a reasonable person, you just want to get to yes.
You just want to get this thing done.
You just want to get to where you want to go.
You just want to get to your goal.
Winning is the goal, right?
or get to your wherever it is you want to go
so that you can move on with your life.
Right?
So you want to get to yes.
If you agree with me, put yes in the comments right now.
You know, if they're feeling warm
and they're kind of on the table
and down like this and listening to you.
You can do that too.
If they're back like this and up and this way you can do that too.
Because when you kind of act the same way
as somebody else and talking sort of similar to somebody else,
they can feel that, they can psychologically feel that
and people want to be with people that are like them
and they feel more comfortable with people that are like them
and so when you're mirroring people's emotions
and their body language, then they subliminally
and psychologically feel more comfortable and
they actually start to feel more like,
oh you know,
I feel like we're in agreement.
I feel comfortable with this person and they feel seen,
they feel heard , they feel acknowledged, they feel valued
and they feel more comfortable in
coming to a resolution and agreement with you
which is what it is that you want
and remember, of course, if you do
come to an agreement to get it in writing,
some kind of writing, some kind of way of documenting that deal.
Super super important.
So that's what I got for you.
Sneaky negotiation secrets that you can use to win any negotiation
and if you are getting ready to negotiate,
couple of things here, make sure you subscribe to this channel,
hit that notification bell.
Grab my free Ebook. 15 pages.
at winmynegotiation.com
all yours for free.
Join my free private Facebook group Narcissist Negotiators with Rebecca Zung
and I'm so glad that you are here.
I am so glad to have you as part of my community.
Remember today is always a great day to start negotiating your best life.
It's a perfect day to slay.
That is my brand.
That is the name of my program.
Slay your negotiation because we are here to Slay.
Slay your negotiation.
Slay your life.
We all can do it.
You know, you only lose if you give up.
You know, you never give in, you never give up.
You can do this.
All right. I will see you guys in the next video.