We are now on day six of Russia invading Ukraine
for no particular reason.
So let's jump straight into the latest news
in our ongoing coverage of the war in Ukraine.
♪ ♪
As we all know,
Vladimir Putin launched his invasion of Ukraine last week.
And if you didn't know that,
well, then that opening graphics thing
must have been a really weird way for you to find out.
But, anyway, when Russia first launched this invasion,
what seems more and more plausible
is that they thought Ukrainians would just be like,
"Eh, Russia, Ukraine-- what's the difference? Come on in."
But quite the opposite has happened.
Ukrainians have stood strong.
They've united in their defense.
And because of that,
Russia has really ramped up their attacks.
NEWSMAN: This morning, Russia escalating its attacks,
striking civilian targets
in Ukraine's second largest city, Kharkiv.
An administrative building targeted with a massive strike.
Multiple social media videos from the scene showing
the attack by Kharkiv's Freedom Square.
Human Rights Watch pointing to this video online,
accusing the Russians of using cluster bombs on the city.
If verified, an attack on civilian areas
would be a war crime.
NEWSMAN 2: Now the capital itself
may be in a crosshairs of an all-out battle.
New satellite images show
a massive 40-mile Russian military convoy
on the move from the north.
Russia's advance is leaving a trail of destruction
in its path,
wrecking villages and suburbs on the way.
Holy shit.
That looks terrifying.
You see the bombs dropping on the parking lot.
The building-- Yo, they just blew it up.
Everything. Everything blown to smither--
And this, by the way, is before,
before the 40-mile-long convoy gets there,
the one that's heading to Kyiv.
Think about that for a second.
Like, this is-- this is so unfair.
And d-- I mean, we've always known that Russia is unfair.
We know that. They don't play fair.
I mean, they sent an actual steroid
to compete in the Olympics.
But this is beyond unfair.
This is a war crime.
And, if anything, it's exposed Russia's lies
about why they're coming to Ukraine.
"Oh, we're coming to liberate the Ukrainian people."
From what? From what, having a place to stay?
It's no wonder that the entire world no longer wants anything
to do with Russia, and the more Putin escalates,
the more the world backs away.
NEWSMAN: Backlash against Russia
from the business sector and beyond.
Local and national businesses,
sports and even the arts are pushing back.
NEIL CAVUTO: Just seconds ago we got word
that Apple is now officially banning all product sales
in Russia.
NEWSMAN 3: Meanwhile, ice skating's world governing body
has suspended Russian and Belarusian skaters
from participating in international competition
effective immediately.
NEWSMAN 3: As for entertainment, Warner Brothers
has halted the release of The Batman in Russia.
Disney and Sony also announced
that they would pause film releases in Russia.
Finally, Netflix will not plan
to add Russian state TV channels to its service,
despite a new law in the country
that requires that they to do so.
Yup, in addition to cutting off Russia's banking
and its travel, the world is now cutting off its access
to technology and entertainment.
And honestly, as much as I agree
with movie companies cutting off the Russians,
I don't think they've gone far enough.
Like, if you really want to punish Russia,
you shouldn't just block new movies.
They should rerelease old movies,
but without any of the good parts, you know?
Yeah. It should just be like,
"Now showing in Moscow theaters, it's Star Wars,
"but just Jar Jar Binks.
"The Matrix, but Neo never leaves the office.
And M. Night Shyamalan's Old."
They don't have to change anything for that one.
They just leave it the way it is and send it to Russia.
But between getting kicked out of international sports
and losing access to Western products,
Russians are going to start noticing
that the life that they're used to has changed
because of Vladimir Putin's decision.
Although, Putin is trying to fill that void himself.
MAN (with Russian accent): Are you worried
about movie not playing in Russia?
Well, do not worry, or we throw you in jail.
Now Russia have many great TV and movie to watch,
thanks to new streaming service-- Nyetflix.
Like new hit show-- Putin Big Table Talk,
number one show about Putin talking at big table.
So what if Russia banned from World Cup?
We don't care. You watch more exciting sport.
Putin play hockey.
He's best hockey player in the world.
-If you no think that, he throw you in jail. -(jail door slams)
And who need Western Batman when we have Russian Batman--
Vladimir Putin?
You watch him practicing judo. He's same as Batman.
Sign up for Nyetflix today, or else you can watch in jail.
(jail door slams)
Now, despite all of the destruction
that Russia's inflicting on Ukraine,
the president of Ukraine is still standing strong.
Today he delivered a speech via satellite to the European Union
where he vowed
that Ukraine would never surrender its freedom.
And he received a standing ovation for the speech.
Meanwhile, the foreign minister of Russia gave a speech
to the United Nations Human Rights Council,
and most of the diplomats stood up
and walked out of the speech in protest.
Which I mean, to be fair, nobody wants to hear a speech
about respecting human rights
from someone who's currently bombing civilians.
It's like the guys from Jackass giving a lecture
about testicle safety.
In fact, the way things are going these days,
there's a decent chance that any speech
by Russia is just gonna end with,
"And so, in conclusion,
"lock the doors and release the poison.
Thank you for attending my talk."
Now, as for the people of Ukraine,
everyone around the world has been inspired
by the resistance that they've put up so far.
You know, and their ability to tell Russia
to go (bleep) itself in so many different ways.
NEWSOMAN: We've seen powerful images posted to social media
showcasing the courage of ordinary Ukrainian people.
NEWSMAN 2: We see Ukrainians coming out, manning checkpoints,
taking their hunting rifles, shotguns,
standing next to Ukrainian troops.
They are cutting down road signs by the roadside
in an attempt to confuse advancing Russian troops.
NEWSWOMAN: It's a popular sentiment on the streets.
This man's sign is too vulgar to translate.
Smatko is a grandmother and a retired economist.
These are the only weapons she has,
but she says she's ready to fight.
"Let those Russian shits come here," she says,
"We're ready to greet them."
NEWSMAN: This shows what is purported to be
a Ukrainian farmer attempting to tow a Russian tank
off his land with his tractor.
[people speaking indistinctly]
Do you have a message for President Putin?
[Woman speaking foreign language]
Putin [extended beep]...
You know what I love about the "bleep" sound? It's that
no matter what language you speak around the world,
you always know what it means.
Yeah, because if I tell you to [extended beep] river,
you can safely assume that I wasn't
wishing you a happy birthday.
And yo, that shit was crazy. Did you see that?
This is the middle of a war.
That farmer towed a Russian tank away with his tractor.
That is... the most gangsta thing on the farmer's side,
and it's the most embarrassing thing for the Russian soldier.
I mean, especially the way-- like, he's chasing after them
like the cops just towed his car.
"Oh, come on, I was about to feed the meter!"
And despite the overwhelming odds,
you have to respect the fight, man.
You have to respect the fight that the Ukrainian people
are putting up. Civilians are grabbing shotguns.
Farmers are towing tanks.
Like, one thing we are learning from this war is
if you're gonna invade a country,
maybe don't pick the one where the grandmas know how to
turn their knitting into a fire bomb.
"Oh, you look thirsty. How about a drink!"
But, as brave as these people are, everyone is still terrified
about the potential outcome of this war.
And that’s mainly because the madman who has launched it
is really, really, really unpredictable.
Growing fears about the mental stability of Vladimir Putin
as Russia pushes ahead with its invasion of Ukraine.
One American familiar with the intelligence telling CNN,
"Putin has been completely isolated, partly because of
"COVID. He is now just basically by himself,
"completely cut off from most of his advisers,
"isolated geographically... the only people talking to him are
sycophants who are just feeding his resentment."
NEWSMAN: We saw new images that show the lengths Putin has gone
in recent weeks to isolate and socially distance himself
from others, even his closest advisers and cabinet members.
We're seeing him sitting at the end of a very long table.
Those long tables have become his trademark,
and his aides are clustered all together on one end,
he sits by himself on the other.
U.S. intelligence has learned that Putin
has exploded in anger at people in his inner circle,
expressing frustration over the state of the military campaign
in Ukraine and the worldwide condemnation of his actions.
That's unusual, they say,
because, as a former intelligence officer,
Putin usually keeps his emotions in check.
Yeah, apparently, Putin is really pissed off
because this invasion is not going how he planned.
And this is a big deal, because usually
Vladimir Putin doesn't show any emotions.
Like, if you've ever seen him, he's always got this
weird combination of being super calm
and also super dangerous.
Like a cobra that took too many edibles.
You know, it's just like...
(hisses weakly)
You do a cobra on weed.
And, you know, it actually makes sense. It makes sense
that people haven't seen Putin show his emotions before,
because, remember, Vladimir Putin is a trained spy.
Spies have to keep their emotions in check.
Like, even if a spy goes to a party and at that party
they're serving pigs in a blanket, you can't freak out
and get all excited like normal people. You can't be like,
"Oh shit, they got pigs in a blanket!"
No, you can't do that. You got to be like,
(Russian accent): "Yeah, pigs in blanket. It's okay, I guess.
Yeah, give me, like, seven."
(normal accent): But, you know, it does make sense.
It makes complete sense that he's lashing out now.
Remember this, Putin doesn't know what it's like to lose.
He "wins" every reelection without campaigning.
He "wins" judo matches against world champions.
Now, suddenly, he's having trouble
beating a country that's a fraction of the size of his?
No wonder he's mad.
And by the way, this war shows you the big difference
between a guy like Trump and a man like Putin.
'Cause, like, as bad as Trump was,
he never had the vision and the focus that Putin has.
You know? Putin's dream is to reunite the Soviet Union
and turn Russia back into the super power that it was.
The only dream Trump ever had
was to combine a-a Big Mac with a bucket of KFC. Yeah.
That's probably what he made Area 51 work on.
"Forget the alien autopsies, this is more important.
"We need to get the chicken inside the meat.
Deep in it, tender."
The point is this, the point is that anyone in the world
can be a madman.
But once you add power and vision--
that's where shit gets real.
But please, please, I beg you,
don't confuse Putin with Russia.
Because although he's in charge, there are a lot of people
in Russia who don't like their president or his war,
and they have also been displaying
some extraordinary courage.
Resistance to Russia's attack on Ukraine is growing,
and not just around the world, but also within its own borders.
NEWSMAN: Anti-war protesters risking their safety
here in St. Petersburg. It's one of many protests
across the country, as Russian authorities
have detained nearly 6,000 people--
grandmothers, teenagers, women, you name it.
NEWSWOMAN: Some saying they'd would rather risk arrest
than live with guilt.
"I want the whole world to see that we don't want it,"
this woman says.
Powerful signals of an awakening to aggression and injustice.
NEWSWOMAN 2: "No war, please."
This is what a number of athletes
and celebrities are advocating for.
Russian tennis star Andrey Rublev asking for peace
after his win Friday.
NEWSMAN 2: Hundreds of journalists signing a petition.
Uh, the director of the Bolshoi Ballet
signing a petition. Even the children of oligarchs
and of Kremlin officials speaking out on social media
against the war.
NEWSMAN 3: And a Russian lawmaker, who voted
with President Putin just this week, now saying
"I didn't vote for Kyiv to be bombed."
Man, you got to give people credit
to people protesting this war, because
you know how brave it is to speak up against Russia
inside Russia?
Like, I'm not even in Russia,
and I'm gonna test my coffee for poison after the show.
Like, you know, it's-it's always funny how people in America
think the world has ended when they get banned from Twitter.
But think about it-- in Russia they don't delete your Twitter,
they delete your life.
And it's not just many Russian civilians
who are against the war. No.
One reason the invasion might not go as well as Russia
has hoped is that even some of its own soldiers
reportedly don't want to be there.
Many of them thought they were just doing military exercises,
and they weren't even told that they were being sent into war.
Just think about that.
I mean, I think we can all agree
that war is the worst kind of surprise there is.
I mean, well, that and the reveal on Love Is Blind.
"Oh, you have a face tattoo in the shape of a goatee.
I'm so happy."
So, even within Russia,
people are standing up and risking their lives
to stop a unjust war,
which is probably why Putin is resorting
to things like this.
NEWSMAN: Putin is ramping up efforts
to control the narrative at home,
banning media from characterizing
Russia's attack on Ukraine as an assault,
invasion or declaration of war.
Instead, state-run media propaganda
paints Ukraine as Nazi aggressors
and Putin as Russia's defender.
NEWSWOMAN: Russian state TV has not been showing
Russian forces attacking Kyiv or attacking Kharkiv.
Russians who watch TV don't really see
all the things that are going on in Ukraine.
NEWSMAN 2: We have seen crackdowns on social media
over the last couple of days.
Twitter has been operating at an absolutely sluggish pace.
The Russian government has said it will censor
parts of Facebook.
Wow. So, not only is Putin cracking down on dissent
but he's lying about what's actually happening.
Yeah. He's even banning the media
from calling it an assault, an invasion or a war.
All of the things that it is, by the way.
Which means Russian newscasters
must be, like, deep in their thesaurus.
How do you even describe this?
"Now to our ongoing coverage
"of the, uh, international bullet exchange
taking place in Ukraine right now?"
What's crazy about this whole thing
is how Russia isn't banning Twitter.
Did you see that? They said they're just slowing it down.
Like, really slowing it down.
Which I feel like is somehow worse.
You know? I mean, if you ban Twitter,
fine. You've banned it.
At least that way, people get, you know, time.
You'll be more productive. You know how productive
I would be if Twitter suddenly disappeared?
I'd have so much more time to watch TikTok.
So, look, people,
there's really no sugarcoating the situation right now.
Despite the bravery of Ukraine
and the efforts around the world to punish Russia,
this invasion might get a lot worse
before it gets better.
And if Putin is as crazy as he seems,
our only hope at this point
is that, like, some hero Ukrainian farmer
will come tow him and his giant-ass table away
as far as possible.