Hey little boy!
My chocolate must be untouched by human hands.
He'll drown!
He can't swim, save him!
Augustus, no!
Augustus!
Augustus, watch out!
There he goes.
Call the fire brigade!
It's a wonder how that pipe is big enough.
It isn't big enough, he is slowing down.
He's gonna stick.
I think he has.
He's blocked the whole pipe.
*bass starts playing*
Look! The Oompa-Loompas.
Back off you little freaks!
What are they doing?
*music intensifies*
Why I believe they are going to treat us to a little song.
It is quite a special occasion of course.
They haven't had a fresh audience in many a moon.
*music*
*Oompa-Loompas chanting*
Augustus Gloop, Augustus Gloop. The great big, greedy nincompoop.
Augustus Gloop, so big and vile. So greedy, foul and infantile!
‘Come on!’ we cried,
‘The time is ripe,
To send him shooting up the pipe!
But don’t, dear children, be alarmed,
Augustus Gloop will not be harmed!
Augustus Gloop will not be harmed.
Although, of course, we must admit,
He will be altered quite a bit,
Slowly wheels go round and round,
And cogs begin to grind and pound,
We'll boil him for a minute more,
Until we're absolutely sure,
Then out he comes
By god, by grace,
A miracle has taken place,
A miracle has taken place!
This greedy brute,
This louse's ear,
Is loved by people everywhere!
For who could hate or bear a grudge,
Against a luscious bit of,
Fudge!
Bravo!
Well done!
Aren't they delightful?
Aren't they charming?
I do say that all seemed rather rehearsed.