Heya playa, have you ever liked someone that not only didn't just like you back but just
straight up hated you?
Hate might not be the right word to describe how you think they feel about you but lets
walk through what it looks like if they do potentially hate you and what you can do about
it.
This is The Josh Speaks.
You're watching The Josh Speaks.
It seems like a lot of things get tossed under the label for hate but what I would consider
true hate is that person despising you so much that they want to rip your head off.
But I don't think most people, including your crush want to do that.
So here are a few signs to show you that you are on the road to being hated or even disliked.
First off if your crushes friends are trying to keep you away from talking to your crush
that may be a sign that they don't like you but it's hard to tell.
And the reason for that is, you don't really know how much of their actions is what they
want for your crush versus what your crush wants for themselves.
Lets say you walk up to a group of people that has your crush in it, when you go to
talk to them they tell you to buzz off.
Now that doesn't mean that your crush doesn't like you, maybe collectively as a group they
don't want you there but you shouldn't assume the worst.
And if the group is just standing in the way of you talking directly to your crush I would
call them out and ask them what's up.
If you ask them why they won't let you talk to your crush and you get an answer like they
don't think you're cool enough or they know your crush doesn't like you back, tell them
"listen, let me talk to them and find out for myself".
Either way if what they're saying is true, it's still better to hear it directly from
your crush because then you'll be 100 percent certain that that's how they feel.
So let's say you talk to your crush and they flip out on you and tell you off.
That's a clear sign that they hate you right?
Not exactly, sometimes people are just having bad days and they might just be taking it
out on you.
It's very easy sometimes to see misdirected anger pointed at us to be all about us, especially
if it comes from your crush.
But one thing to remember is that when you like someone, you're bound to read more into
their behaviors simply because you like them.
In fact if you want to see if their outburst was directed intentionally towards you, try
talking to them on a different day to see if they carry those same feelings.
Okay but what if you try to talk to your crush and they just flat out ignore you, that's
a clear sign of hate right?
I would still say no, just because someone isn't paying attention to us in that moment
doesn't mean they're always ignoring us.
Throughout the day people have a lot of thoughts running through their minds.
So we shouldn't always assume they're in that present moment listening to us.
If you are uncertain about whether or not they're choosing to ignore you, try to be
direct about it.
Tap them on the shoulder and say "Hey I'm curious what your thoughts are on what I said".
From there they'll either ask you to repeat it, tell you they have no opinion or say they
don't care.
But at the end of the day you'll at least know that they heard you and shared what they
felt.
One thing that I'm not trying to say is that you're always misreading things and that they
do want to talk to you.
I think there are a few instances that might mean that they don't like you.
The first one is that they flat out tell you that they don't want to talk to you.
If they're coming from a place of level headedness and just deliver that message honestly and
openly then I think it's a clear sign that we should probably leave them alone.
Would I call that hate though, not exactly.
But I do think it's a clear sign to respect their boundaries and to leave them alone if
they ask you to.
Another sign may be if you do something that's not that cool and they call you out on it.
So for example I've gotten lots of messages from different people saying things like they've
taken pictures of their crushes secretly or they tried to secretly go behind their crushes
back to end their relationship.
If your crush finds out about these things then I think you've only shot yourself in
the foot.
You kind of ruined it for yourself but the best thing to do in that situation is to accept
it and move on from them.
But perhaps the most damaging way they can show that they hate you is by talking bad
about you to other people.
And I don't mean them saying that you're annoying sometimes, I mean them actually spreading
rumors, telling lies and doing everything they can to hurt your character.
That is not a cool thing to do and I would say it falls along the lines of hate but there
is a clear cut solution here that I think you can take.
Even though you really like this person, if they're so quick to judge others do you really
want to be with someone that says hurtful and harmful things about other people?
I think it's so important here to find out the details before you draw your conclusions.
Try talking to your crush and their friends to find out what's really going on instead
of just assuming the worst.
What do you think though, are you not quite sure if your crush hates you or not?
Leave a comment below and we'll talk about it.
If you want to learn more about this topic, I've put together a video on 5 reasons why
people may not like you.
It's more general in nature but it can still be applicable to your crush situation.
Remember, regardless if your crush hates you because of something you did or just because
you can always grow as long as you're willing to work on building your character.
I know you have it in you and I want to help you get there, as always guys, love and peace.