Hey.
This is Clayton Olson and I’m back with Camille Virginia from masterofflinedating.com.
And in this video, we are going to talk about masculine and feminine energies and how to
use feminine energy to attract the right man for you.
Now Camille, this video is really important and I've had a number of clients that are
successful entrepreneurial corporate women who are killing it in their careers.
And that success in that specific context sometimes, and actually very often, can get
in a way of their dating life.
And it affects men in a certain way that it's not really positive and I would love to get
your opinion on if a woman is kicking ass in her career, how would she begin to find
her feminine energy?
How would she do it?
And perhaps maybe the place to start would actually be talking about why it's important
for a woman to find her feminine energy?
And then perhaps we can go into the how and talk a little bit about that.
Sure, so I think most women wants the man to take the lead.
And since we're in this weird modern pop culture dating situation where like you said, you
know, women are kicking ass in their careers and going out with, you know, work can be
a very masculine energy mode.
And I was in corporate for 10 years and I now have my own business like I get it.
You know you've got to be ruthless sometimes but we don't want to be like that all the
time.
We want the guys to take the lead.
We want to be feminine.
We want to, you know, you have these things that come naturally to us and be able to turn
off that masculine energy but a lot of women don't really know how to do that.
So, I think it's important because when you stay in that masculine energy so much and
you feel like everything's on your shoulders it's stressful.
It’s exhausting.
You know it's not enjoyable and it may serve you well in your career but by actually turning
that off you know or turning that down a little bit in your home life, your social life, it
just balances you out.
You know everyone has a balance of masculine-feminine.
They shouldn't be in all for a 100% all of the time.
Yes.
I completely agree.
And a point to add to that from the man side, when a woman is able to be comfortably in
her feminine, and that doesn't mean that she doesn't have a very well-developed masculine
side, but when a woman has the flexibility to move into the feminine it actually allows
the man to feel like a man in relationship with her.
And I gotta say the women that I dated, the ones that allowed me to feel like I was able
to root into my masculinity and lead and initiate, the feeling that I got in those interactions
and those in those relationships was head and shoulders above the ones where we were
almost fighting for some type of leadership position.
Or let's not even say leadership, let's talk about the initiatory or the being the initiator
in the relationship fighting for that.
So, I just wanted to add that point of just how important it is to be able to have that
flexibility or that range to be able to go into the feminine if you're a woman.
Totally I couldn't agree more.
I love how you described that too.
I was like, “Yes that sounds so great.”
Yeah actually I like to quote Foreigner on this.
There's a Foreigner song and it's like, “the woman in you brings out the man in me.”
And I mean you hit the nail on the head if you know when you're in your feminine mode
and actually it encourages the guy and allows him to step up and be masculine which is what
you know what he wants to naturally be for you.
Yeah absolutely.
So how does a woman do it?
How does a woman go from this?
Perhaps taking off that outfit, that garb of masculinity that allows you to be successful
and move more into this this feminine receptivity: softness, openness and perhaps allowing him
to lead.
So, I like to call it the Flip to Feminine.
So, it is having a trigger that will get you out of that work mode, out of that masculine
energy and it's like basically engaging one of your senses.
And so, it could be expensive perfume.
It could be changing your clothes because when you change your clothes, you change your
energy.
So maybe have a date right after work and you know just bringing us a change of clothes
can just help you get into that different state of mind or different pair of shoes or
something like that.
Or you know enjoying some chocolate, doing a five-minute meditation, just something to
have to draw the line and will allow your body to tap into that feminine side and be
like all right works over and time to be in dating social feminine energy mode.
Beautiful.
And what other qualities go into something that emulate or reflect this femininity that
women are wanting to have more of access to?
Well let's see, I was teaching a workshop the other day and I was talking to the students
afterwards just so you know what stood out or what was your impression of the tips that
I covered, and one of them who was who was a very high-powered corporate consultant said,
“it gave me permission to be girly again.”
And it's just that like she's like kind of like a little schoolgirl you know like we
all have that in us.
I think we shut her down because – this is another point I want to make, being feminine
does not mean weak.
For some reason, you know a lot of people I think have adopted this notion that oh when
you're feminine your weak but I mean if anything when you know how to work your femininity
you’re actually a lot stronger.
But you know it's just allowing yourself to be playful and flirt and have fun you know
your style of play that's what I would call it.
It’s a little bit different for everybody but find what it is for you, you know, what
you do at home when no one's looking like dancing around the music or singing or whatever,
you know, that kind of thing.
Tap into that.
Be that out in public more and have a trigger to get there.
Yeah.
Great.
Wonderful.
And I love the “be playful” distinction and that it's not a weak but it's the ability
to be playful and be flirtatious and not take life so seriously.
Men typically, by default, take life really seriously.
All the men that I've known, the clients that I've worked with, friends, there's something
about this idea of what it means to be a man that gets culturally programmed into us and
it's probably passed down as well through our family systems of the man being a provider
and somehow rising in status and making something of himself in life.
And that is not an easy path and it's often one that brings about a lot of stress, a lot
of heaviness, a lot of kind of like a stoic nature, and the perfect complement what gives
a man permission to begin to crack out of that and find more flexibility in his life
is when a woman is comfortable courageous and strong enough to be in her femininity
and bring that to the interaction.
So, I see your point it's not weak, it's so needed I think by men and it is what makes
you just irresistible.
Yeah and it's funny because it's what women want but we just have been conditioned to
think, “Oh well you know if you're girly or feminine like you know you're not going
to get as far in your career and stuff that that couldn't be further from the truth.”
So, you know finding that feminine strength and then you know I love that you said about
it brings out his masculinity it allows him to go there which makes him feel great.
And I love making other people feel great whether it's men or women so that's just even
more encouragement for me to tap it to my feminine knowing that it makes my guy feel
great too.
Yeah.
But it’s totally it, it’s the feeling that you end up giving to people around you
by being able to have that.
That's beautiful.
Well Camille thank you for sharing your thoughts on feminine and masculine energy and how women
can step more into her feminine.
If anybody wants to learn a little bit more about what you do over at masterofflinedating.com,
what would be the next step from here.
I would say start with my free ultimate guide as a gift to all your viewers and it's called,
Best Date Ever: The Ultimate Guide to Turn a Chance Encounter Into An Epic First Date.
And it just has a whole bunch of tips of how to start putting yourself out there no matter
where you are on the social or dating comfort zone just easy authentic natural ways and
you can find that at master offline dating.com/clayton.
Beautiful.
Well thank you and everybody the link that Camille just mention is below this video in
the description so be sure to check it out.
And Camille thank you for coming on and sharing your wisdom about offline dating.
it's been an absolute pleasure having you and I look forward to continuing the conversation
and hearing about what you're up to as everything continues to unfold in your life.
Awesome, thank you so much for having me Clayton.