Hey everybody, welcome back. Today I'm going to be talking
about how to build confidence and trust at work so that you
can get bigger and better assignments. And so I'm going to
be teaching you the five B's like be as MBE, how to be the
five B's to building trust and confidence. So for all the best
advice, and guidance and support that you're looking for, please
subscribe to my channel, I drop a new video every single
Thursday, or I'm talking about career and love and
relationships, and mental health and all that good stuff. And if
you're not familiar with me, my name is Tess Brigham. I'm a
licensed psychotherapist and board certified coach. And I've
been working with people for over eight for close to 18 years
now say over 15 years. And but for the last decade, I've really
been focusing on young adults just like you, helping them
figure out who they are, what they want, and what they want
from life. All right, so let's get into confidence and trust.
So you know, competence and trust, they actually go hand in
hand. And the thing to know about confidence is is that
confidence is a muscle, right? We're not born with confidence,
but it's the actions that we take that help us build
confidence over the years. So what's really important to
understand is, is that confidence is about you, and how
you feel about yourself, and how you project that image out into
the world. Right? It's from internal to the outer journal,
the help journal, external. And so what's important to remember
is, is that as you build confidence, when people see that
confidence, they trust you more. And with that trust, it helps
you build confidence. And with that confidence, it helps build
trust, right? Confidence is really something that you can
use as a building block in life, right? where it's like, you
know, when you take action, it helps you build your confidence.
And the more confident you feel, the more actions you take, the
more actions you take, the more confident you write, you can see
how confidence gets into this loop with with with people,
which is why it's a muscle, right, it's very easy. If you
are not focusing and trying to build your confidence muscles on
a regular basis, that they will start to weaken and shrink and
get a little walk. Right. So that's why confidence and trust
go hand in hand that if you want the trust, if you want your
bosses and managers to trust you more and and, and invest in you
more and believe in you, this is what you have to work on is this
confidence piece and finding ways to build it. So
the five B's, and these five B's will help you not only build the
trust that you're looking for, it will also build that
confidence. Okay, number one, be proactive with what you're
doing. bosses, managers, they are overwhelmed with so much
stuff, be proactive, right? If you see a problem, fix it, if
you if you have an issue with something, you know, go deal
with it. Especially if your boss already really believes in you.
And you feel like okay, I have a lot of really good autonomy with
them. Right? They want to know what you're doing. But they
don't need to know everything all the time. And so if you feel
like I can't really go and fix this big problem without talking
to your manager, that's fine. I understand that. But a big part
of being proactive is being able to say this is the problem. This
is how I think we can fix it. This is how long I think it'll
take and what do you think I'd like to lead this right? Be
proactive, ask for what you want, go after the things
constantly think about what can I be doing to make my manager
and bosses lives easier? What can I do to build, you know, my
own trust and credibility with people? You know, what does that
look like? Okay to is be vocal, meaning be vocal in meetings,
speak up. So many of my clients will tell me that they get into
these meetings, especially with the bosses and their bosses,
bosses, big managers. And they won't say a thing, right? They
think like, Oh, I had an idea. And I wanted to say something
about it. But then I kept thinking about it and going in
circles about it. And then someone else raised their hand
and they said the exact idea I had. Trust yourself. Trust that
you understand your job, you understand what's happening,
that these meetings are about a conversation. And don't doubt
yourself so much that you don't know what you're talking about.
Raise your hand and make your suggestion. Worst case scenario
is some people don't like it. Okay. Be vocal show up. All
right, the second. The third one is it is and it goes hand in
hand with this vocal issue which is be visible. And I know this
is really hard for people right now. I'm recording this video
during the time of a pandemic. So So I know that this can be
challenging for people to be visible the way they used to
when we were all in offices together. But think of creative
ways in which you can be more visible in meetings. Right? Do
you constantly turn off your camera and not get involved? Do
you not give suggestions? You know, a lot of times people are
like, a bunch of means I don't think I needed to be in any of
them. Right? Your time is valuable. When you're in a
meeting? How do you make an impact? How do you show up? How
do you? You know, how do you make great suggestions? How do
you add to it, not just be there to just, you know, check a box
somewhere? How do you add to each conversation, each meeting
that you're having, and there's lots of other ways to be
visible. You can volunteer for things, you can join committees,
you can join, like, there's all these you can start committee,
I've had clients who they saw a particular issue that was like
off in their company, and they said, you know, what we really
need is this kind of committee. And they started the
committee's, and it really created an amazing company
culture. And it also made my client very, very visible to
people. Okay, for be consistent. I know that it's really hard,
because you could get all jazzed and like, this is it, I'm going
to build my career, I'm going to go out there, I'm going to do
this stuff. And then you you know, put together this proposal
for your boss and say, this is the thing I see wrong. And here
you go. And you could give it to them. And they'd be like, Oh,
no, I don't think that's gonna work. And then you're like, Oh,
well forget it. Right and give up, be consistent. careers, take
time building careers, take time, I am constantly putting
myself out there and lots of different ways. And I get a lot
of nose or I get a lot of being ignored, I get a lot, right. But
you consistently have to keep showing up and showing your
bosses and managers like, Hey, we can trust him or her because
they keep showing up. And the fifth one is Be patient, be
patient, I don't want you to start to think like oh my god, I
have to be practically invisible. Doo doo doo doo doo
doo doo doo, this is going to be the rest of my life. And to
write a big part of careers is this kind of this delicate
balance of focusing on what's within your control what how you
can better yourself what you need to do in order to get
promoted, right? To take on these things that you need to do
in order to build your career. And at the same time, it's about
being able to say there's a lot of things out of my control
right now. And I can't really do anything about that. And I have
to be patient with myself, it's not gonna happen all overnight,
right? And it's hard. It's really, really difficult. If
you're smart, if you're ambitious. If you have these big
dreams, there's really this want and desire to like, I want to go
I want to get it done, I want to do it right now, I understand
that feeling really, really well. But you've also got to
trust that, you know, it takes time, and that it's not going to
happen all overnight. And that you have to be patient with
yourself. And if you feel like you're spinning, spinning,
spinning, constantly thinking about work doing all this stuff,
then that's your clue to not I don't want you to burn yourself
out, just sort of say okay, you know, I'm going to keep being
consistent showing up to meetings, doing all these
things. But I'm going to stop trying to control so much. I'm
going to really focus on what's within my control and show up
there. All right. So this entire month of December, I am talking
about careers. And so there are two other videos this month that
I would love for you to check out. The first one is imposter
syndrome and how to overcome it. And the other one is how to stop
drifting and start taking control of your career. And if
this video really spoke to you, you feel like there's someone in
your life you want to share it with please share it to them
with them. Please spread the word about my channel, please
subscribe. I'm here every single week, every Thursday, um, and if
you liked the video, please like it. Comment below and I want to
hear what are you going to be? What's the B that you're going
to choose this month to focus on. Alright, I will see you next
time. Bye bye