ain't no man just spoiling you without having to give out that cookie. did your
friend had to give out the cookie, did you have to give out the cookie? uh, the cookie
and I said no. welcome back to Neemah Speaks a place where I empower women throughout the diaspora
remember don't you know that a man being rich is like a girl being pretty you might not marry
a girl just because she's pretty but my goodness doesn't it help with your host
Neemah Speaks. Today I wanted to come back and talk about how to find your whale aka how to figure out
why would a man spend money on you? why men will spoil you? I did that video on
men give women receive I got a lot of comments from a lot of women and men saying
"ain't nobody just spending money and buying your friend a car and giving your friend this giving
you that just from the goodness of their heart they gotta be something that they want back in return"
so today I'm gonna break it down. I'm giving you the cheat code that you can use to decipher
what type of man you're dealing with this is the video that you should be coming back to rewatching
it over and over again psa if you're a sensitive type of person don't watch this video but without
further ado let's get started. So the first type of spenders I call them "tit for tat" now as the name
suggests these are the type of people who they are giving but they are expecting something in return
them spending on you is a transaction and they're expecting something in return when you go to the
store and you give them money or you charge your credit card for something you're expecting to
get that bread, get that bread get the head, and leave..okay hold on I'm doing the most so these are the type
of men that you guys were mentioning on my video that I did on men give women receive most of you
are saying Neemah you're such a liar ain't no man just giving you, spoiling you without having to
give out that cookie did your friend had to give out the cookie did you have to give her the cookie
uh the cookie and I said no we didn't because we we're not dealing with the tit for tat type of men
and that's just the truth so if you have only been in company, in your only reality, you experienced tit for tat
type of men then yes they are expecting you to give something back in return that's how
transactions work so what are some signs and what are some things that you can look for to see if is
this person a tit-for-tat or not one of the thing that i love about tit-for-tat type of spenders and
when i say i love take this with a grain of salt is the fact that they are so blunt okay
they are extremely blunt about their intention they don't sugarcoat it they don't say that I'm
just gonna give this because of the kindness of my heart no they're gonna be upfront and real
with you and tell you that I'm gonna give you I'm gonna spend this money but babes you're gonna give
out that cookie you're gonna give out that time you're gonna give out your energy you're gonna
give up your space you gotta give up something in return for the men. okay, so you may be like Neemah how so?
For example sugar babies a sugar baby is somebody who is dealing with a tit-for-tat type of man because
sugar baby she understand if she has to give up her time right she's giving her her time so
they can have a companion and they're giving out what buy them stuff spend all this money and do
all of that's one example of a tit-for-tat type of man. Another example, only fans that's the tits for tat
tapas spenders okay those men in there they're not just there to support you
because they feel like oh heck no they're expecting something back in return so again
the first type of spenders and the first reason okay the first reason as to why men would
spoil nor spend their hard-earned money on you is because they're expecting something back in return
and we're going to call these teeth for touch or transactional spenders. The second type of men
who would spend money on women are ego spenders now i am just coming up with these names y'all
don't come for me so ego spenders they just sound like the name. they're spending because
it inflates their ego now I'm gonna be honest I'm gonna be truthful is that men or just egoistic
they have an ego and that's just about it an ego spender is a type of man who he is spending on
you because he wants you to look and feel good right maybe like nima isn't that a good thing
no no hear me out he wants you to look and feel good because he is trying to impress
other people so even though it might sound like he's quote-unquote genuine but he is not doing this
for your goodness. okay he is spending that money on you so you can look good so he can tell his
friends his family his co-worker and show you off as a quote-unquote trophy it's the actual
truth okay it's the truth some men will only spend money on you because they want you to be a trophy
you to shut up and look good be pretty increase your status and that's about it they don't want
anything else from you because it's inflates their ego boosts up their status having a
quote-unquote pretty woman around you and I'm just To be honest okay so what
are some signs that you can look up for to gauge and see am I dealing with the ego spender here
is this person an ego spender is it trying to boost your ego and there are some women who are
okay with this they're okay for them to just be a trophy because they don't care if you all go in a
business trip and he's out there doing business most of the time you'll be by yourself in a room
doing your own business you can be shopping you can do whatever but honestly they don't have much
time for you because you're just there to increase their status to make them look good so that's
about it and it sound mean it sound rude but it's the harsh reality that y'all have to hear this so
what are some signs that you can be aware of if he is trying too hard they do the most because they
might have that money they might have the ability to be able to spend on you but they are kind of a
show off okay so these second type of spender the ego spender these are the one that i want you to
be careful because if you are okay to just be a trophy shut up be an eye candy in my arms I don't
want you to talk I don't want your brains I don't care about your brains that's your job and you
can get whatever you want in this life I'm here to provide for you and if you're okay with that
type of dynamic then babes go ahead, get you an ego spender because he's gonna give you whatever you
want but he just wants you to be quiet like a statue okay you're gonna be like a statue he's
gonna be inflated with your ego that's about it so again the second type of spenders are ego spenders
this bring me into my third type of spender or the third reason as into why a man would
spend money on you buy you a car do whatever it doesn't matter right and these i call them
generous spenders now this is the type of person that i was talking about in my video if you didn't
watch you men give women receive video when i was talking about my best friend she was dealing with
the generous spenders now what exactly is a generous spender they are extremely sweet
they are spending because they genuinely feel like it okay they are emotionally providers
they are emotionally invested in you and they want to do it because it's the from the goodness
of their hurt now most of the time a lot of women usually take this type of man and destroy them
okay when i say destroy them since this person is extremely genuine and they are extremely real
they are so in tune with their emotion that if they feel something for you they just wanna
make you happy in a sense so they're gonna spoil you rotten, most women abuse that, and this man
end up realizing okay people are using me and then he becomes a transactional spender. that's how it
usually goes i'm just being honest i'm being real so what are some signs that you gonna have to
figure out to notice these quote-unquote generous slash emotional spenders and one of the things that I'm
going to tell you ladies please whenever i give my opinion is that don't go out there and abuse
these tips one of the sign is that they like you more than you like them generous spenders slash
emotional providers are the type of people who genuinely want to just spit on you because they
like you so much and they just want to do it the example that i gave with my friend is that
for her, she was able to get the phone the car the trips is because the guy genuinely
liked her that's it is what it is and she did not have to do anything in return and he did that
because he genuinely cared okay he genuinely cared and he wanted to just reduce the inconvenience and
just the headache from her life and that was about it and most of you people don't believe me but
that's the truth some men they just want to do it because they are generous and they have it they're
like okay if I have it I can just give it to you i like you, I mean e motionally invested and that's
about it so the third type of spenders i call these are generous spenders y'all don't abuse them
don't go out there because you realize that they like you more than you like them then we start
abusing them don't do that that's not nice i don't like when people take advantage of other people
but it's just something to be aware of. The fourth type I call, Providers. I love them.
they're my favorite. Why do I attract providers? Because it was instilled in me since I was little
From my family; my dad and family memebers they provided and spoiled me. So it's kind of the norm for me and
what's the norm for me it's what I attract. most women would love to have a provider man because they are just genuine
like that, they feel it's their duty to provide for you. them spoiling you, spending the money on you
it's not a big deal. Because they feel it's their duty to provide. It just makes them feel good
they don't have any malice or anything like that now most of the time I want to be real
here, for providers, most women cannot handle it. especially "modern women"
because providers feel it's their duty to provide so for example if you guys go
on a date, the bill comes they're gonna wanna take the whole check and pay. But since we have quote
unquote modern women, most women might say oh I have my own money how dare you blah
blah blah and then it becomes a whole fiasco and then? they're turned off by that .they take that
as a personal insult i have had somebody tell me this they find extremely turn off when they go
on a date or something like that and they want to pay the bill but the woman wants to go 50/50
you want to split this six ways or something like that. One thing that I have to clarify here providers
are not the type of quote-unquote manipulator they like to see that you have your own okay they
want a woman who she has her own. she has her own brain (independent thinker), her own life (you're living your best life)
you can take care of your own. This is my favorite quote from my dad he always tells me that:
"in the presence of a man, a woman doesn't have to do anything" -Neemah's Dad and they live by that quote
to the fullest even though they know that you can take care of your own they love it that you can
do it by yourself but it just make them feel good they can step in and help you out and again this
is from my personal experience and my friends and the people that I observed around me experiences
look at this watch this video again who i describe and figure out which type of spenders
and their reasoning behind why they're spoiling you or spending that money on you
and what aligns with your value and your beliefs as always y'all know me I keep it real I keep it
a buck but I gotta go ahead and give a shout out to today's show cohost, shout out to Vee she is the person
who was able to make today's video possible as always if you'd like a shout out go-ahead
become a part of Neemah Speaks Inner circle go to www.patreon.com/neemahspeaks and join the inner circle
if you made it this far into the video go-ahead hit that like button if you didn't like the video heck
hit that dislike button and share this video with another person who needs to hear it you know the
drill, emoji of the day put down the whale emoji and write; "I found my whale" okay I found my whale with
the whale emoji so I know you're a real one and you made it this far into the video as always
Nawapenda Sana