I want my parents to accept me for who I am,
and be proud of me.
They don't like my career choice,
my lip fillers, how I dress.
So I'm worried what they'll think
when they see me at my 21st,
like partying and drinking with my friends.
I guess we'll see.
I'm feeling very nervous.
So today The Actors' Program is probably gonna let me know
if I'm gonna get in or not.
They only take like 16 people a year.
So it's quite like competitive to get in.
If I get into TAP, it means I get to study,
and learn a lot about acting, and yeah I wanna do that.
I kind of just went into uni because,
I didn't really know what I was doing with my life,
and my parents would've slapped me if I didn't.
Oh, I got the email.
Oh my god.
I don't wanna open it.
I'm Alison, I'm 21, and
I'm a baddie.
Mum: Hello?
Hello.
You didn’t get in?
Hey, it’s okay.
Like we said, just give it a go.
If you fail, no big deal.
If someone needs background actors, you can still do that, right?
It’s just when there’s something you really want to do
but you can’t do it.
But that’s okay, there’s still other things you can do.
Think about this Aixin,
this is the kind of thing you can only do when you're young.
After 30, you can't do this kind of thing anymore.
Maybe you'll get married, have children,
your body will be changing.
It's only for when you're young.
It’s okay, think about happy things, Aixin.
Your 21st party – how happy is that?
My parents, I want them to take it seriously.
Like for example when I have an audition,
they're the last people I tell,
cause I don't feel like they'll give me
the support that I need before my audition.
Like yeah it kinda sucks saying it out loud but yeah.
My biggest worry for my 21st party is my parents.
They've never even seen me drunk.
So I don't know how that's gonna pan out.
Like I don't want them to think like
Alison's going down the wrong track,
she's hanging up with the wrong people.
I don't even know what day it is today.
Sunday, a day of rest.
But not for me!
We're just getting some drinks.
There's not really much to do cause we're in lockdown,
so we can't go out.
But we can still have a few cheeky drinks at home.
Do you guys have fizz cider?
Aw that time in Calendar Girls
when I had a fight with a stripper.
That's so playful.
So cute.
What do you think is the first thing you'll do
when we're out of this?
Book my lip fillers.
Absolutely.
You're doing really well.
I'm holding a boob right now.
It's great for pain.
I feel like getting lip filler these days,
is like getting a haircut.
Like it's so just casual now.
Ice, keep it for 10 minutes,
and then help with swelling and bruising.
So for my 21st party, I did have a goal
to lose a bit of weight
and just be a little bit more snatched.
Like I did like lose a little bit of weight
and I was like yeah, yeah, I'm happy about this,
but at the same time, it's just like oh
I still have more to go.
Like once you start getting there,
you want more and more,
like it's just not enough.
Still have enough money?
It’s enough, I have StudyLink remember.
Ah yes Aixin, you can keep looking for work now, can’t you?
Yeah, I have a friend working at a restaurant.
I think that would be quite good.
What Mum’s thinking is you should find more proper work,
the kind in an office.
Have an office desk, a computer.
Ah, this kind of work.
Okay. I’ll have a look.
You know there are parts of my life
that I want to share more.
Like if I have a fight with my friend,
I want my mum to be the first person I go to.
But she's just not like... yeah.
I just don't want to be lectured, really.
I just do wish that at times I can go to them
and just have a gossip session,
and rant and just let out my feels.
I think my parents really value stability
because it's kind of the only way they know
how to live.
Like my dad's dream when he was little,
was going to university.
It was literally go to university,
and move to the city or you stay here and plant corn.
I feel like they didn't really have any influences
that could make them feel like they could do more.
I’ll show you, okay? You take one.
Am I not doing it right?
You’re doing it fine, but press it.
You have to press it.
Then bring it together with both hands.
Yeah that’s how I did it.
Our family has three people and three styles of dumplings.
We came to New Zealand on 18th March 2004.
Alison was three and a half.
We came from Dalian, in the northeastern part of China.
It’s a coastal city.
Those first few years were very hard,
mainly because in China I hadn’t done manual labour work,
whereas that was all I did for the first few years here.
She’s 21 now, about to graduate.
I just want her to be happy.
She was only 18 when she moved out.
I always said don’t move out.
You have everything you need at home.
"But I've grown up now, I'm independent."
She has her own convictions.
All we can do is support her
and hope that she realises her dream.
But we don’t want her to hang her hopes on her dream too much
and suffer because of it.
How are you not moving at all?
Little princess.
Don’t get injections again, okay?
It’s just a little swollen.
It’ll be all good after a few days.
Twenty years ago in China, Mum got injections as well,
on my forehead.
After half a year it just dissolved.
When mine dissolves, I can get it touched up again.
No, don't get it touched up, just leave it.
But it will dissolve.
Aixin, you have to understand,
how you were born,
how you grew up, is how you are.
Don’t alter yourself.
I feel a bit better about not getting into The Actors' Program.
Think about this.
Back when Dad was in China,
the first time he applied for his master’s program, he didn’t get in.
The second time, he missed out by 2.5 points.
The third time, he got in.
That’s right.
In the past we would always teach you this and that
to help you get over things.
But actually what we need to do more is listen to why you’re upset.
Have you let it out.
We don’t need to then lecture you on this and that, right?
Listen to your feelings.
You get it, yeah.
Here, cheers.
I'm so happy.
Make a wish, make a wish.
I wish that I stay hot, young and fierce.
So I feel like this whole time I have been saying,
that my parents don't really understand me.
I realise they do understand me in a sense,
and I need to kinda see it from their perspective as well.
And I think I'm just gonna have
to be a bit more open about my life,
instead of feeling like
not scared to tell them,
but feeling like they're not gonna support me
if I tell them about an audition,
or stuff like that.
At the end of the day it's still my life.
So I'm gonna live it the way I want to.