Boomstick: This episode of Death Battle is brought to you by Carbonite!
(Cue: Battle- Jim Johnston)
Wiz: Every generation has idolized a sci-fi hero.
B: Like Luke Skywalker: Legacy of the Jedi!
W: And Harry Potter: The Boy Who Lived!
He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick!
And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor & skills to find out who would win...
...a DEATH BATTLE!!
Wiz: As the orphan son of Darth Vader, Luke Skywalker carries the blood of the most powerful Sith Lord ever known.
He was raised by his aunt and uncle who kept him safe by disguising his true powers before being taught by a wise old mentor in the ways of The Force.
B: Luke's weapon of choice is the lightsaber, a combination of my two favorite killing tools- swords and lazers!
W: Despite having little formal training, Luke advanced in lightsaber combat much faster than any other Jedi.
He even took down a friggin' TIE fighter with it!
Only a month after he blew up the Death Star! What a badass!
W: Luke is a master of Form V- Dijem So; an aggressive combat stance with defensive posture.
Specializing in both perseverance and pressuring the opponent.
B: Despite what ya might think, Lightsabers isn't just for killing.
It also works pretty damn well for defense!
W: Even so, Luke's most instrumental tool is his unrivaled connection to the Force.
He can apply it in three different aspects: Control, Sense and Alter.
Controlling all aspects of the body...
...sensing and utilizing his surroundings...
...and altering the environment.
B: Like the mind trick thingy!
Oh man, the terrible things I would do with that!
When injured or exhausted, he can push his physical limits with the Force Body ability.
And use Flash Burn to neglect pain until he can mend his wounds with Force healing.
B: Although Luke uses the Force to move things with his mind. With almost no limit!
W: Finally, Luke can use Shatterpoint to identify any possible weakness or fracture in a subject.
Add just a little pressure with the Force...
And BOOM!! They explode faster than an Firestone tyre!
W: Luke has defeated a wide variety of foes ranging from Stormtroopers to deadly Sith Lords.
One of which Luke had construct a second lightsaber to beat!
B: His shorter red Shoto saber was to counter the Sith Lumerire's lightwhip.
And it worked pretty damn well!
W: He still carries it, though perfers a single blade over two-handed combat.
Hehheh. Penis too.
Anyway, Luke doesn't have a obvious weakness aside for some pretty serious daddy issues.
He doesn't carry a blaster but unlike other stupid Jedi, he isn't afraid to use one.
W: While Luke is no fan of violence, he certainly will not hold any punches.
Luke: "I'm an Jedi."
"Like my father before me."
W: As an orphan, Harry Potter carries the talents of the most powerful dark wizard ever known...
Lord Voldemort.
He was raised by his aunt and uncle who kept safe by disguising his true powers before being taught by a wise old mentor in the ways of magic.
Boomstick: Now why does that sound familiar?
Wiz: Harry wields a 11 inch Phoenix Core holly wand.
He has learned numerous spells and is exceptionally skilled in charms.
B: His trademark attack is the disarming charm: Exspellerapterumus or whatever...
Wiz: Expelliarmus.
Which can either knock a weapon away or throw the opponent into the air.
The Confundus charm temporally confuses the target...
...Stupefy stuns people and the shield charm protects Harry from all attacks.
B: And he can summon anything he wants to him with Accio!
Ahem...
Accio money!
Accio loose women!
Damn...
W: His Firebolt is an racing broom that can reach 150 miles per hour in less than 10 seconds.
That's faster than Wiz getting shot down by a woman!
Right! Uh, no wait! Back to stuff!
Harry is also experienced in curses. He can destroy objects with Reducto...
...slashes enemies with Sectumsempra...
...and control minds with Imperio.
B: And then there's the killing curse...
Abracadabra!
W: Avada Kedavra.
B: Oh, so that magician wasn't trying to kill me!
I guess I probably should go apologize to his family...
Wiz: While Harry never actually used the killing curse, it is implied that he can.
It is an instant-kill and unblockable-
B: Unless it hits an wall or an sword or anything, really...
Almost all magic requires an line of sight and eye contact to perform.
The killing curse is no exception.
Harry also knows Appari... uh, teleporting and can do it without a wand!
W: His training in Occlumency means he defends his mind from any sort of mental attack or illusion.
B: And he got all sorts of other spells but I seriously doubt the tickle charm's gonna help him much in the fight...
...so let's move on.
W: Harry owns the Cloak of Invisibility, an unrelenting Deathly Hallow that hides the wearer from sight and cannot be detected.
Unless he makes a noise or pokes his foot out.
Harry is a quick draw with his wand and has performed many great feats at very young ages.
Wiz: He has also mastered non-verbal spells.
B: By the time he was 17, he was a way more experienced wizard!
In the Battle for Hogwarts, he had no problem kicking a ton of Death Eater ass!
Not to mention Lord Voldemort himself!
W: Afterwards, Harry became head of the Wizard Hunting Aura office, even though he is technically a Hogwarts dropout.
B: He never really did finish that seventh year.
But I guess if you killed the lord of ultimate evil...
...you get a GED.
Harry: "Reducto!"
Alright, the combatants are set!
Let's end this debate, once and for all!
But first, let me recommend Carbonite...
Boomstick: For all your Han Solo freezing needs!
Uh, no Boomstick. It's an website.
What?
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Like viruses, spyware or electro-cancer!
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But you can use the code: DEATHBATTLE to start a 15-day free trial at carbonite.com.
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But right now, it's time for a DEATH BATTLEEEEE!!!!
MK Announcer: Fight!
Harry: Avada Kedavra!
Avada Kedav-!
Experlliarmus!
Harry: Accio Firebolt!
Protego!
Confundus!
Stupefy!
(Harry chokes)
Avada Kedavra!
Sectumsempra!
(Harry screams in pain)
SF3 Announcer: K.O!!
B: Man, Harry did a surprising good job keeping Luke at a distance.
W: But Luke fought smart and try to finish Harry quickly with Force Persuasion.
But Harry was able to resist, thanks to Occlumeny.
Then Luke used Force Choke to stop Harry from casting spells.
W: And although Luke had dodged the Avada Kedavra, the instantaneous Sectumsempra caught him off guard.
But with Shatterpoint, Luke discovered a exploitable flaw...
B: That famous lightening bolt scar which caused Harry to lose the battle!
Wiz: The winner is: Luke Skywalker!
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Wiz: Thanks for watching!