The Ocarina
Like most wind instruments
Are grown in the wild on Ocarina trees
Close to the native clarinet bush
And the common flute wood
However
Unlike most wind instruments
The Ocarina is imbude with special powers
Such as weather control
Horse summoning
And most interestingly
The ability to travel through time
[SPLAT]
So
What is an Ocarina?
How does it work?
And what is that smell?
Let's find out, in the Science of Power Ups!
The Ocarina actually originates
from the distant future
But after a fortuitous gust of wind
And the tiny paws of a curious rodent
The Ocarina was propelled back in time
to the distant past!
To be first discovered
By Duke Luke the Fluke
Who was immediately killed by an agitated bad boy squirrel
The notes of the Ocarina
Emit a unique type of soundwave
That can pierce through the fabric of reality
Like a hot quantum knife through the space time continuum of butter
Thus creating a one man
One way
Wormhole through time!
You can even use it to meet your
Great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great
DINOSAUR!
If you find yourself in the past
Please resist all urges to murder your grandfather
I mean, look at him
He wouldn't hurt a fly!
I'M GONNA KILL HI-
The specific chords must be played precisely
There's absolutely no room for milkshakes!
I mean mistakes
One wrong note and anything could happen!
Like, your legs could fall off!
Or your head explodes!
Or your head transforms into a pair of legs!
And then explodes!
STOP!
Excessive time travel can cause queasiness
Insomnia
The destruction of the universe
And your wrist watch not working!
And possibly exploding
This is volunteer no. 9
She's been with us for a while now
And it's time for one last experiment before retirement
Defeat Attila The Hun
in the heart of battle
Good luck number 9!
We're all practically rooting you on!
And away she goes!
Let's check the history books and
oh...
Hmmm
I'm disappointed in you no. 9
If you had paid closer attention to your European history
you'd have seen this coming
And that concludes-
Oh
Ah
That cosmic blast was me sending a time bomb into the past
To kill my Grandfather
Ha!
Time paradox, shime sharadox.
The Universe seems perfectly fine to me-
And that concludes our study for now
For-
*cough*
(Female voice)
Excuse me
For tonight's homework
If x-4 and y=5
What is the square route of Ocarina?