-Welcome back, everybody. I am here with Ryan Gosling!
He stars... [ Cheers and applause ]
They love you. They love you. We love you.
He stars in that highly anticipated new Netflix movie
"The Gray Man."
Now, Ryan, everyone knows that you're an amazing movie actor,
but what a lot of people might not know is that
you're also an accomplished television actor.
And we -- Back in the '90s, we starred in a TV show together,
called -- It was a crime series.
Do you remember this? -I remember.
"Tough Cop, Tough Cop."
-It was called "Tough Cop, Tough Cop."
That's correct, yes.
We played two detective partners,
but we were both the tough cop.
And, man, we didn't play by the book at all.
-No. Well, I mean, it got canceled.
-It did get cancelled.
-It was way, way, way too tough for TV.
-That was the slogan.
The slogan was, "It was too tough for TV."
-It was way too tough. -Way too tough for TV.
And it turned out to be true.
Anyway, you're not going to believe this,
but we actually got our hands on a clip.
-What? -Yeah.
Here's me and Ryan Gosling in a scene from
the '90's crime show "Tough Cop, Tough Cop."
-Really? -Take a look at this.
♪♪
-"Tough Cop, Tough Cop."
-Alright, scumbag.
We know you whacked Richie Badabucco.
And you're going to tell us where the body is!
-You don't want to talk, huh?
Then you're leaving us no choice.
We're going to get tough.
-Oh, yeah, we're going to get real tough.
-We're going to get so tough!
-We're going to -- we're going to take you out back
and make you look at how bad a job we did
parallel-parking my car.
-You got a real nice face there.
It'd be a shame if somebody
snapped an unflattering photo of it.
A person might post that photo, too,
and maybe it becomes a meme!
I don't know! -He doesn't know!
Stick out your tongue,
because I'm going to squirt a dab of wasabi mustard on it.
Damn it, we're getting nowhere with this guy, man.
-I've never seen anything like this.
It's like he's made of granite. What do we do?
-I don't know what -- I know what to do.
-Oh. -It's time to get medieval.
You hold his arms up, and then I'll tickle
the crap out of his armpits with a feather.
-You are one sick son of a B-word.
[ Laughing ] Oh! Come on!
-Get ready to talk, mother[bleep]
♪♪
[ Cheers and applause ]
-Yeah.
-I forgot -- I almost forgot how intense that series was.
-It was really intense.
But, you know, it wasn't as intense as
the next series that we did, right?
-Oh, you mean "Tougher Cop, Tougher Cop"?
-Oh, my God. You know it.
-Yeah, they said that one was too tougher for TV.
-Yeah. -Yeah.
Well, you're not even going to --
-It's probably why it got canceled.
-It got canceled, as well. -Yeah.
-It was way tougher.
-It was way too tough. -Way tougher.
-You're not even going to believe this.
-What? -I talked to the...
[ Laughter ] -No.
-I talked to the producers. -You have it?
-We have a clip of that show, too, that series.
Here's a scene from "Tougher Cop, Tougher Cop."
♪♪
-"Tougher Cop, Tougher Cop."
-Back again for another round, huh?
Get up, you sick -- you sick...
Sit -- You sit. Sit down!
On the chair, normal. Like a normal person sits.
-Sit down! Sit down! -Sit!
-Sit down! Sit down!
-Sit down.
-Well, if you thought we were tough before,
I guess you don't know the definition of the word tough.
-We spent the summer at the gym getting Jacked!
So you spill the beans, punk, or I might just turn the channel
when you're watching one of your favorite shows!
-Alright, calm down, calm down!
I'm going to treat -- I'm going to treat your face
like the display bongo at Guitar Center,
and I'm itching to play my
favorite Dave Matthews Band song, "Ants Marching."
[ Vocalizing "Ants Marching" ]
♪ He wakes up in the morning ♪
Get up, get up! Don't you disrespect me!
-Oh, he's got me, Jimmy! He's got me, Jimmy!
-Get off him! Get the hell off! -Get him off me!
Get him off me! Get him off me!
-Oh, you're doing the no-hair thing now.
-Get him off me. -Alright, that's it, that's it.
-Come on! -What are you going to do?
What are you going to do to him?
-Nothing to say, huh? That's it. I've had it.
-Yeah. -I'm done playing nice guy.
Someone's going to lose their nose!
-What?! -Yes!
Who's got your nose, you stupid mother[bleep]
-Stupid mother[bleep]
♪♪
[ Cheers and applause ]
-They don't make -- they don't make TV like that.
You wear your jacket the same as me.
-Yeah, you know, just my style, man.
-Yeah. They don't make TV like that anymore,
I got to say.
-You know, I guess -- But I guess
that's why it got cancelled.
People couldn't handle it. -That's true.
But we did have one last spin-off, though.
-Yeah, that's true. "Toughest Cop, Toughest Cop."
-"Toughest Cop, Toughest Cop."
And we actually have a scene from the show.
-And it was way too toughest. -We have a clip.
-Way too toughest.
-You're not even going to believe this.
-How are we getting these? -We have a clip. Here we go.
-This is a blast from the past, man.
♪♪
-"Toughest Cop, Toughest Cop."
-Oh!
Oh!
Surprise, surprise. Look who's back.
Huh?
After three years, you're finally going to talk?
Huh?
One slap is all it takes.
-Sit down! Sit down!
-Your hair? You want to put your hair on?
You want to put your hair on? -Put your hair on!
-Yeah. Your mustache is on his head.
That doesn't belong there, and you know that!
That's his mustache!
-That's mine! -That's his mustache!
-Give me that! -Give me that beard.
And he wears your beard, okay? That's the way it works.
You want to be tough now? -Who's got your beard?!
-Who's got your beard, dude? -You're gonna take my mustache?
-Who's got your beard, dude?
Now, listen to me.
I'm gonna tell you something. -Sit down!
-Now, listen, you know what I'm going to do?
-Talk to him. Talk to him, Jimmy.
-Give me this. -I got him.
I got him. -Don't kick me.
Now, listen.
We can do this.
-Just throw him up.
-Alright, now listen. You want to talk?
You gonna talk now, dude? You going to talk?
-Oh! -Oh, geez.
-Oh! -You going to talk?
-Sit down. -Now, listen to me.
You start talking right now. What are you going to do to him?
Tell him what you're going to do to him.
-If you don't start talking right now --
-Pull your shirt down, you sick --
-Pull it down!
If you don't start talking right now,
I'm going to whisper into my partner's ear,
and he's going to laugh so hard.
And for the rest of your worthless life,
you're going to wonder what that joke was!
-Yeah, that's right! Now, look.
Take my mustache, and you wear my mustache.
-Yeah. -And guess what.
Get ready to be pile-drived, dude.
You sick mother[bleep]
♪♪
-It still holds up. [ Cheers and applause ]
My thanks to Ryan Gosling.
More "Tonight Show" after the break.
Stick around, everybody. Come on back.