Mark: Thanks for doing this. I really appreciate it guys.
Mark: Don't tickle my nips. Matthias: *laughs*
Mark: Hello, everybody my name is Markiplier!
And welcome to the Don't Laugh Challenge
Now, I've done this two times before but these
guys are actually my inspiration
Mark: for doing this in the first place Bryan: Ohh Goo Matthias: *smooch smooch smooch smooch*
Mark: So, they have videos of this over on their channel
Mark: I'll put the link in the description, but now... J-Fred: Ooh!
Mark: We're gonna do the Don't Laugh Challenge
Where we put some seltzer water
Mark: In our mouth, so that it's even worse when it goes Matthias: *sluuurp*
Mark: out of our nose, and this time Matthias: *ahh!*
to make it different. TOUCHING
IS ALLOWED! There are no
Rules, there are no limits.
It-Its just touching. It's like the Wild West of touching.
Unclaimed territory, ready for
the grabbing-
J-Fred: I'm pretty sure it's just the Wild West.
T-They try to-
Mark: It's the Wild West.
J-Fred: They touched a lot too...
So, uh,
I, uh, [Intense Replaying]
I'm not gonna go first.
J-Fred: He's not wearing his Team Edge shirt, 'cause it got all wet.
Mark: Yeah... Ohh, I should sh-- J-Fred: Neither of them are.
Mark: I should change my shirt.
I have open armpits. You guys have easy access to my nips.
[Team Edge be like NONONONO ]
J-Fred: Nah, I don't, I don't... Matthias: I'm not gonna touch your armpits, bro. After a full day... Ryan: Hey, hey. A t-shirt's not gonna stop me, alright?
Mark: *laughter* J-Fred: I don't wanna stick my hands in your sweaty armpits, man.
J-Fred: I don't wanna stick my hands in your sweaty armpits, man
Matthias: Yeah. After a full day of working out in the hot sun, I'm not gonna touch your pits, dawg.
Mark: I got washed in the bath.
Mark: What is that?
J-Fred: I don't know, my grandma bought it at T.J. Maxx.
Matthias: *laugh* She was like "Maybe you could use this for your...Games of Edge~!"
Mark: Nice!
Bryan: Alright, ready?
Mark: "Your Games of Edge~!?" Matthias: *laughs* "The Games of Edge~!"
Mark: "YOUR EDGE GAMES~?"
"Welcome... to the EDGE GAMES~!" [*Distant Whistle*]
Matthias: Are you gonna time? *laughs* Bryan: You gotta set the timer. Mark: Oh yeah, sure.
Matthias: He's just like playin' around. Mark: Alright. Matthias: Set the timer man!
Mark: 3, 2, 1, BOOP
Mark: Three...two...one... BOOP.
[Bryan starts drinking]
[Matthias chomps Bryan's cheeks]
[Bryan holds in his laughter]
Matthias: *giggles*
Mark: When I was six years old...I was born without a face.
J-Fred: He already lost some!
J-Fred: Look at his nose. It's like a bull flaring. Matthias: Wait, let- hey, let me tell you this story real quick.
Mark: Sure. What's the story? Matthias: Okay so, one time, we went into Habit...
J-Fred: THE Habit. The hamburger joint. Matthias: The Habit... you know, the hamburger joint? Mark: Yeah.
Matthias: And Bryan ordered a drink. He ordered a drink, and...
Matthias: She put down the cup, the empty cup... Bryan: *huffing through his nose*
Matthias: Is it burning?
Mark: *laughs* Oh my god...
Matthias: She...the-the hostess put down the empty cup, and he grabs the tip jar--
Mark & Matthias: *laugh* J-Fred: Oh god! Ohh!! He got it in my mouth!!
Mark: Oh, jeez!
*slow motion laughter* J-Fred: *slow motion "Oh god!"*
Mark: That was 37 seconds.
Matthias: Ewww! J-Fred: Eugh! Bryan: Dude!
Mark: Wow!
J-Fred: I-- Bryan: And there's pressure just building in your mouth! Mark: What... What happened??
Matthias: So, basically what happened was, instead of taking his cup, he took the tip jar and filled it up with water. *laughs*
J-Fred: And there was m- Matthias: And then gave it back, and there's money in it, and he's like "Sorry..." Mark: What??
Matthias: *laughs* Mark: You asshole! *laughing*
Bryan: Okay. To my defense, it was a fresh tip jar with only one single bill in there.
Matthias: It was a dollar bill in a clear cup!! Mark: *laughs more*
Matthias: So, every time we go back to The Habit, I'm like, "Hey, this is the guy that filled up your tip jar with water."
Matthias: And they're like, "Ohh!" and they all start clapping. Mark: *laughing*
Mark: How big of a quaff did you do? J-Fred: Eww! Oh, that-oh, it was in your mouth, I just rubbed my hands in it! Aeuggh!
Bryan: *laughs* Mark: Alright, so you have a 37...
Mark: Three...two...one... Bryan: The time is starting NOW.
Bryan: Oh, that was not a full... More!
Matthias: Huweeee.... *laughs* Bryan: *unintelligible gibberish in Mark's face*
Bryan: Ohh~...
Matthias: *laughs* I don't know what'd make Mark- I don't- All but Mark: *laugh*
*I'm dead inside*
Matthias: I don't know what'd make Mark laugh. J-Fred: --make Mark laugh.
*End my suffering*
Matthias: Okay, so let's think about what makes--
666 ALL IS LOST
Bryan: Oh! It's hard! Matthias: Tickle the nip!
J-Fred: That's enough. That's enough. Bryan: It's hard!
Matthias: Why is it getting hard?? Bryan: It's a little hard!
He wants to laugh so bad
(Mark continues to think about his life) J-Fred: Don't you squirt on me!
Brian: [Making weird noises] Matthias: No he's not gonna laugh, okay.
Brian: Oh, you need to get right one out Matt
Everyone (except Mark): HAHAHAHAA
Matthias: Too much dude
Bryan: you gotta do something
J-Fred:oh he swallowed. Matthias:Ohhh!
Matthias: You know what's gonna show up now?A fanfic of you two together Bryan: NOOOO! (laugh) Bryan:Oh! Oh! Why aren't your cheeks puffing up?
J-Fred:Cause he's drinking it! He's drinking it!
Bryan: It's leaking out of your nose! Matthias: Do you even have a sense of humor?
Bryan:He doesn't. Bryan:*random noises*
J-Fred:Dude you're good at that! Matthias: Huweeeee
Bryan: *unintelligible gibberish*
Matthias: *laughs*
*random talking* Matthias:Why so much nip? J-Fred:Why the nips, dude? Matthias:Why are you attracted to his nips?
Bryan: I don't know J-Fred: What is he doing?
Bryan: I don't know... Matthias: You're doing some...you're dead inside- Bryan: You're drinking it Mark: *Disapproving murmur*
Matthias: Don't look at me! Bryan: You didn't put it on one-
Bryan: Don't point. It's leaking. Matthias: No pointing! Bryan: It's leaking! Stop! J-Fred: Try this again
Matthias:He's gonna spit, wait don't move his glasses, he has to spit on his glasses now, Sucker!
Matthias:Is that burning?
Mark:*laughs and spits* *everyone screaming*
Mark:You can't touch my ear!
Mark: It was like probably 1'58 or something J-Fred: I didn't I didn't know touching the ear was legal
Mark:Eughhh...I had to move it back in my throat, I wasn't swallowing as as is evident by the volume
Matthias: *laughing* Mark:I had to move it back 'cause I compact- It was so much gas was being built, I had to vent out a way to vent it through my nose
J-Fred:I do that with my farts! Mark: Oh good! So much nip abuse
Yeah *Laughing* Mark: I have other body parts! J-Fred: Bryan was getting a little kinky there... Matthias: I don't want to touch anything
Mark: I'm gonna touch all over you Bryan: Touch all over you? Mark: Wouldn't be the first time
Matthias:Why are you looking at me with such lust?! Mark:Why wouldn't I?!
Matthias:You're like... *impression*
J-Fred: I think it's because when he takes his glasses off, he's just so... Mark: I'm just naturally sexier when I take my glasses off
Mark:Three, Two, One... Boink.
Bryan:No, no! That's not even a full- Oh no... Mark: It's pretty regulation J-Fred:*odd laughter*
Mark:Do you want to know how they cause Bulls to collect their semen?
Mark: They stick... Bryan: Ehhh that's not gonna make him- Mark: They stick an electric rod up their anus and
then they send an electrical current through it and it's called Electro-ejaculation
Mark:Cool, right? No? Bryan: Oh, the gas is building! J-Fred: Check out this laugh!
It made him laugh...
Bryan:Oh yeah, shake his head! Shake his head- J-Fred: How is that going to make him laugh?
Bryan: What, I have to touch you!
J-Fred: You have to? Bryan: I need- I need to tickle... J-Fred: You have to?
Bryan: Does that tickle? J-Fred: No breathing! Bryan: Tickle...
Bryan: Oh, he's leaking! J-Fred: You're not allowed to breath, Dude! Mark: A tender, sweet, delicious massage
Bryan: Ok, you have- J-Fred: Enough with the nips! Mark: You've got some girthy shoulders
They're really nice
Mark: You like them? No? Bryan: I can't reach him! Joey, touch him!
J-Fred: Oh, okay... Bryan: Oh my god. Mark: Wait, let me-
Wait, gimme that!
Mark:Can Hulk give hand job?
J-Fred: Wait, let's get- Let's get Mark: Do you want turndown service?
J-Fred: Let's get- *Bryan makes silly noises* Mark:*laughing*
*Bryan and Mark making noises*
Mark: Think of Hulk whispering tender nothings in your ear... J-Fred: Let's, Okay, wait wait wait
Lets get- let's get some, uh, fizzy action going on there
What? I'm allowed to touch!
*Laughing*
J-Fred:That's shaking the top of his head, you idiot!
Why are you hitting me? You keep getting my hands wet
Bryan, shake his cheeks! This is the first time I've done this to you
J-Fred: Oh, thank you. Bryan: Stop, you can't block it, Dude, you have to accept it
*Matthias whining* Mark/Bryan: You have to accept it
J-Fred: Everybody touch him at once!
Mark: Hulk, goochie goochie goo, you old baby!
J-Fred: What if the Hulk had a baby?
Mark:You're at 2:12
*Bryan making more silly noises*
J-Fred: What is this?
He's laughing!
Mark: What is that?
J-Fred: You swallowed!
*high-pitched laughter*
*Matthias spits* *Yelling and Laughter*
Bryan: Time, time, time!
Bryan: What was his time?
Mark: It was like 2:27
Matthias:I win!
Mark:Not yet...
Matthias:Wow, my mouth tastes so weird
Bryan:"My mouth tastes so weird"
Bryan:No! No, no, no! C'mon don't pretend like you took a lot!
Matthias:Are you gonna to time it?
Mark:Yeah...Oh shit. Yeah.
Go
*Matthias burps*
Matthias: Do you remember when I veloc-
*Mark yelling*
*Matthias making weird noises*
Mark: With your mouth puffed out like that, you look like a big mouse bath
*J-Fred spits* *Laughter*
Bryan: Wow, you su-
J-Fred: He said- He said, "Big mouse bath!"
*Laughing*
Mark: That's what made you laugh?
Matthias: You said it incorrectly
Mark: My speech impediment made you laugh?!
You are a horrible person!
Mark: Alright, ready? Matthias: Ready?
Mark: 3, 2, 1
J-Fred: Nobody even caught that he said, "Big mouse bath!"
*Matthias laughing*
Mark: Big mouse bath?
i-i knew it when it was coming out of my mouth, but you didn't catch anything-
I got the time! It's going! We're just not worried about you right now. we're having
our own conversation where-
*Matthias yells*
J-Fred: Do you mind?
*Laughing*
J-Fred: That's all I have to say
*Matthias: Incoherent sounds*
Mark: What?! *Laughing*
*Making fun of Matthias*
*Laughing*
*Weird noises*
Matthias: Bryan, look at this
Bryan, watch this
Bryan-
*Bryan spits*
Matthias: OHHHHHH
*Laughing*
Matthias: What time?
Bryan: OHHHH!
It's going up my nose!
Mark: That was like 0:32!
J-Fred: Was- Was it working? Was my-
Bryan: Shaking? Yeah, Dude!
*Laughing*
I'll do a full mouth!
Full mouth!
Bryan: Open up
Matthias: Full mouth?
J-Fred: Why is-are all these challenges we're doing today so messy?
Mark: Alright, here
Matthias: Yeah, that's right. Get it in there.
Bryan: Pffft, You've got a smaaall mouth hole, Dude
J-Fred: A what?!
*Laughing*
J-Fred/Matthias: "A SMAAALL MOUTH HOLE"
Matthias: "What does that mean?!"
J-Fred: You said you had a, " smaall-"
Bryan: Mouth hole!
J-Fred: No, you said-
Matthias: "SMAAALL"
*Laughing*
"Smaaall"
Bryan: I said, "SMALL. MOUTH. HOLE."
Matthias: -You gotta "smaaall" mouth hole.
J-Fred: Replay that, please!
*Slow motion* "You got a smaaall mouth hole, Dude."
Matthias: Ay, you got a big mouth...
bath...
What...?
J-Fred: *Joking* That's the- that's the correct way to say it
Matthias: Ay, ay, you know what's got a "smaaall" mouth hole?
Bryan: Did you start the timer?
CHEATER!
Matthias: *Country accent* A "smaaall" mouth bath
J-Fred: How did nobody-
Bryan: MALL MOTH
J-Fred: "Mall Mouth?!"
Dude, I met this girl- I went on a date with this girl one time,
she had a bad case of "mall mouth," I gotta tell ya!
Matthias: What's a "mall mouth?"
J-Fred: You don't wanna know, Bro. *Laughing*
Matthias: You've been around the mall a lot?
J-Fred: Yeah
Matthias: Kissing guys?
J-Fred: Yeah
*Laughs*
*Matthias making incoherent noises*
J-Fred: "Chewbacca?"
*Laughs* Matthias: Chewbacca
J-Fred: Nobody can talk about mouths correctly
*Matthias: High-pitched squeee!
Bryan: Ah, yes!
J-Fred: Ah, I'm like right in front of him.
Bryan: Ah, yes!
Matthias: Hey...
J-Fred: Hey, give him a little shakey-shake
Bryan: Oh yeah! *Laughing*
Matthias: What's your favorite TV show?
Bryan: Ahhh boogie lips!
J-Fred: What's your favorite-
Bryan: It's Booger bomb!
J-Fred: Oh, look how tiny his mouth is right now!
*Laughing*
Matthias: Oh that is-
Bryan: You got a small mouth hole!
*Laughing*
*Mark spits*
Mark: Dammit!
God dammit!
*Laughing*
Making fun of my tiny mouth!
J-Fred: It was like this!
Bryan: 1:18
Mark: Don't make fun of my tiny mouth!
Matthias: You were like... *makes face*
Mark: I HAVE A SMALL MOUTH!
J-Fred: That's the greatest thing I've seen all day
Matthias: -Desperately small! Mark: It was like- it was like desperately pinching it in-
J-Fred: Let's see how small you can get it!
*Laughing*
That's a tiny mouth!
Mark: *Tiny lips* Hey, Baby
Matthias: I always thought they were just the photoshop
things you made your thumbnails in to!
Bryan: That's a small mouth hole, alright!
*Matthias making weird noises*
Bryan: Once he completes the full mouth reception, then he can...
*Laughing*
J-Fred: What...?
Bryan: No, C'mon, open up and...
*J-Fred laughs*
What was that noise?!
*Still laughing* *Imitates noise from Matthias*
J-Fred:He's got a cut above his eye
Matthias: Mmmm?
Mmmmm! *agreeing*
Mark: *Singing* Wake up! dundundun a little makeup!
alalalalalala shake up!
Mark: *sing-mumbling*
Bryan: Let's look at his lips now! What does he have? He has...
J-Fred (to Mark): What are you trying to say?
Mark: alalalala table!
You wanted to!
Bryan: What!
It's working!
Mark: Whaaaat
Bryan: Do that again!
J-Fred: He wanted to
Bryan: Yo, do that again
*Back and forth* Mark: He wanted to! J-Fred: He wanted to! Mark: He wanted to!
Bryan: Contort your lips
J-Fred: Contort.
Bryan: Contort your lips! *laughs*
Make your lips look like...
I don't know, Garth Brooks or something.
Bryan:He does a good job releasing the air vents from his nostrils.
J-Fred:There's no air vents!
Mark:There's no-it's called your nose.
*all laughing*
J-Fred:He swallowed!
Mark:Ever go up to a girl at a bar and say "Hey, baby, you got some nice air vents."
*all yelling and laughing*
J-Fred:That's how I hit on girls. "Hey baby. You got some nice industrial sized air vents."
*all laughing*
J-Fred:That's not doing it?!
Mark:Man, what's your wattage, baby? Your fans are killin' it.
J-Fred:Just got these huge nostrils.
J-Fred:Zoom in on this.
Mark:You ever see a-you ever go up to a girl and she's 9/10ths nose.
Bryan:Nine tenths nose?!
Mark:Nine tenths nose. *laughs*
Bryan:Well, I mean, I'm, uh
J-Fred:Yeah I mean. Team Edge man.
Mark:Oh, yeah, I'm overshadowed by your guys's noses.
J-Fred:Team Edge has big noses.
Mark:You gonna spray on my face? You gonna spray on my face, baby?
Bryan: Baby?! He said spray in my mouth baby!
Mark:Spray on my face, dang, get it right!
Bryan:Open your mouth hole.
J-Fred:Mouse hole, dude!
Mark:1:44. You almost lost like nine times here.
Bryan:How is he doing it? How are you releasing the pressure without-
J-Fred:*making fun of Bryan's emphasis*The pRESSURE
Bryan:Shouldn't the bubbles be goin' into your nasal cassage-cav-cav-
*laughter* Mark:Cassage.
J-Fred:Okay, that's not fair, you're laughing!
Mark:He's keeping it in though.
J-Fred:You didn't get enough in yo mousehole. Your naval cavity?What did he say?
Bryan:Cassidy
J-Fred:Butch Cassidy and the-
Mark:Oh Jesus!
Mark:2:12 probably. 2:12.
J-Fred:Oh, man, I hope this is mine.
Mark:You have to get like, five minutes straight.
J-Fred:You know what it is? The doctor told him when he was younger that he had very
elastic.Elastis- what's the word for that?
Bryan:Just drink up dude.
J-Fred:His cheeks are very elastic. Bryan:You need a fresh one
J-Fred:Mine just expanded like a chipmunk's
Mark:My cheeks are not elastic.
Bryan:Yeah, yours were going like- *odd sounds*
Mark:For all the beans!
J-Fred:Beans? Matthias:All the beans?
Mark:All the beans.You've never heard of that saying?
Matthias:You mean all the marbles? Mark:No! All the beans.
Matthias and J-Fred:All the marbles.
Mark:No, for all the beans!
Matthias:It's for all the marbles!
Mark:This is my video and I say it's for all the beans!
J-Fred:Who's serving beans?
Mark:Everybody. Matthias:We're actually gonna have beans in a second.
Bryan:What's this little *mocking sound* you gotta- you're pretending to drink!
Matthias:He's actually drinking!
Mark:Go!
Bryan:No, start it once he fills up his gullet.
Mark:Your gullets like your stomach. Matthias:You wanna see something funny?
Bryan:You wanna see something even funnier?