If you had a net worth of $39 billion and were juggling a full-time job revolutionizing
the electric vehicle industry while trying to find life on Mars, you’d probably want
to make sure you had some adequate protection in place.
Just think of all the people who might want to come after you – oil giants, kidnappers
looking for a ransom, maybe even some Martians.
What would you do to ensure your safety?
There’s probably not a lot you can do to prevent the threat of alien creatures, but
with all that money, you can definitely lower your chances of being met with more earthly
threats.
Maybe you’d want a decent CCTV system in your house, a few security guards, and someone
to monitor your cybersecurity.
Well, with such mediocre and uninspired ideas about protecting yourself, I can see why Elon
Musk is a billionaire changing the world whilst you’re sat watching YouTube videos.
Considering that Mr. Musk literally called one of his businesses ‘The Boring Company’
and he once sent a rocket off to space with a mannequin inside listening to a loop of
David Bowie’s ‘Life on Mars’ playing, you can expect him to make some slightly,
well, eccentric decisions for his security.
Think flamethrowers, watchtowers, and intergalactic operations as all part of the picture.
But, first of all, let’s start small.
Even if you’re working 90-hour weeks, you still need a place to sleep and eat.
Musk currently lives in a 1.67-acre estate in Los Angeles worth 17 million dollars.
It’s a pretty flashy home that includes a two-story library, home theatre, gym, swimming
pool, and a huge wine cellar.
Having such a fancy mansion in a place as high-profile as Los Angeles could be a recipe
for disaster, but Musk is bound to have some pretty stellar security.
The safety measures implemented aren’t public knowledge, for obvious reasons, but there
are a few things we know.
For one, the entire security system of the place can be controlled from a mobile device.
If anyone tried to intrude and pull any funny business, you can bet that staff would arrive
in seconds and at the push of a button.
Judging by Musk’ contemporaries, he probably has his fair share of staff.
Tech billionaires in Silicon Valley are known for the throngs of body guards they hire since
the high-profile nature and wide reach of these people and their work makes them particularly
vulnerable.
For instance, fellow tech entrepreneur Mark Zuckerberg has sixteen bodyguards at his home
working shifts to ensure there’s always someone there for if something goes wrong.
By the way, the house has recently hit the market, bodyguards not included.
If you have a few million to spare and you like the sound of the swanky library, you’re
welcome for the heads up.
As for Elon and where he plans to go next, we can only assume he has his sights set on
another planet completely…
You already know that Musk works a 90-hour week.
He’s probably the type of guy to take a pillow with him into the office and have a
power nap under the desk.
So, security at work might be even more important to him than his home security.
You might expect Musk to go all futuristic when protecting the headquarters of his companies
– maybe a laser maze that sets off alarms or a tiny drone monitoring the premises at
all times.
However, in this case, it seems Musk has some nostalgia for the old ways of doing things.
In 2018, he announced his plan to build a 50-foot watchtower for his corporation The
Boring Company, complete with a knight to yell insults at people in a French accent.
I’d make a cheap joke by giving my best impression, but I don’t want to get into
trouble…
There’s no sign of the watchtower yet, but since it’s Musk we’re talking about, I’m
not sure we can assume he wasn’t being serious.
As far as protecting yourself goes, it doesn’t get more comprehensive than installing a literal
watchtower.
In the same year, Musk launched a range of flamethrowers branded with the Boring Company
logo, called ‘not a Flamethrower’ but which definitely were flamethrowers.
Was this all a plan to arm Musk’s most loyal minions and followers with weapons to protect
him, should the moment arise?
Presumably the security staff at The Boring Company are all equipped with the flamethrowers
and ready to shoot at anyone who dares to enter the premises uninvited.
It might sound like a joke, but I’m definitely staying away.
So, what about the daily commute?
Musk lives in LA, a place well-known for its ridiculously complex highway system and congested
traffic.
This leaves plenty of opportunities to be shot at or hijacked whilst driving to work.
But Tesla vehicles are some of the most secure around so, as the founder and CEO of the company,
Musk must be pretty well covered in his car.
Imagine someone is driving him down the road when suddenly an intruder intercepts and jumps
in the car.
Each Tesla vehicle has GPS tracking Tesla itself has access to – so, as long as he
remains in the car, his employees would soon be able to figure out his whereabouts and
attack a kidnapper with flamethrowers.
Even if the kidnapper managed to turn off the remote access feature.
In fact, the cars have a remote disabling system that can also be accessed at all times,
so an impostor could literally be stopped in their tracks.
These security features apply to every run-of-the-mill Tesla vehicle, but the new Cybertruck takes
things to the next level – as well as offering protection in the case of theft and intrusion,
it also has an extremely durable exterior shell.
Okay, so maybe that shell isn’t quite as durable as Elon once thought – once during
a Cybertruck pitch a metal ball smashed the truck’s windows instead of demonstrating
their strength – but I’m sure the engineers have fixed the problem by now.
Tesla claim the shell of the truck is nearly impenetrable, and it features armor glass
to avoid any damage from high impact crashes.
So, if anyone was to try to crash into his car or shoot at him through the window, he’d
probably fare better than you in your Ford Fiesta.
Musk has been seen out and about driving the Cybertruck around Los Angeles a few times.
Publicity stunt or not, the Cybertruck certainly isn’t doing Musk any harm when it comes
to personal protection.
Of course, even the most secure vehicle can’t completely protect you from dangers and threats
whilst driving.
But luckily, the whole purpose of Musk’s Boring Company is to build a tunnel you can
use to drive under cities.
The tunnel is designed to eventually transition into a high-speed capsule in a vacuum tube
that can whisk people about between cities underground.
It can’t hurt to know that, if anyone is ever after you and you need to get away fast,
there’s a whole tunnel under your town at your disposal.
Plus, it does come complete with a watchtower and guard – sounds like a decent level of
protection to me.
In any case, you can bet that Elon Musk isn’t going to be alone while he’s cruising around
LA and attending meetings.
You can be sure he has a few people hired to laugh at his jokes, hold his coffee, and
protect him in the case that anything goes wrong.
Whenever Elon is spotted in public, there are usually a few bodyguards nearby.
And Musk’s security guards aren’t just any old security guards.
They’re known to capitalize on a little-known quirk of the legal system that allows anyone
to easily obtain permission to carry concealed firearms.
In the small town of Lake Arthur in New Mexico, a 2004 federal law granted all its officers
and unpaid volunteers in the police force the right to have concealed-carry privileges
that overrule other local gun restrictions.
As a result, there are more than 300 reserve officers in the town of just 443 people – because
that isn’t suspicious at all.
Amongst the noble volunteers are not just Musk’s security guards but also the staff
of other billionaires, including the Koch brothers.
Bribes may or may not have been involved.
Be right back, I’m off to Lake Arthur…
So basically, Musk probably has a load of undercover security guards who are allowed
to conceal their weapons.
Don’t be fooled by the sweet-looking guy in the jeans.
Going near him in public isn’t advisable.
But it’s not just the physical world that Musk needs protection from – these days,
the online world can be just as dangerous.
If you’ve ever sent your life savings to a beautiful girl you met on the internet who
needed it for an operation only to never hear from her again, you’ll understand what I
mean.
Please tell me it’s not just me…
Luckily, Musk takes cybersecurity and privacy seriously, in both his personal and professional
life.
He’s prided himself on the attention paid to cybersecurity at all the companies he’s
founded or work for with.
Through founding a company that went on to merge with PayPal, SpaceX, and Tesla, his
enterprises have never been hacked and he’s taken care to implement secure systems.
So, you can bet that he’s putting just as much effort into protecting his own sensitive
data and personal information.
In fact, Musk doesn’t use Facebook due to privacy concerns, and he even wipes and destroys
his phones on a regular basis to ensure no sensitive information gets out there.
Classic billionaire antics.
Meanwhile, I’m still here using the iPhone my mum bought me for my twentieth birthday…
Musk may not be a Facebook fan, but he is known for being an avid Twitter user.
This leaves him open to attacks and criticism from online trolls that even his dodgy security
guards can’t save him from.
Luckily, he has an army of trolls to protect him on Twitter.
Because, you know, I’m sure that’s what the man is lying awake worrying about at night.
Anyone who tags Elon or his company on Twitter with a slightly negative sentiment can expect
to be met with an onslaught of abuse from his many fans.
But even when you’re a multi-billionaire that can afford top-of-the-range security,
it’s nice to know you’re getting support from the government.
Luckily for Musk, Donald Trump recently said that Elon Musk is one of the country’s great
geniuses and we need to cherish and protect him.
Give me a moment, my eyes are welling up…
It’s unlikely the government is helping to foot Musk’s security bill or launching
a special CIA mission to make sure he’s safe, but it seems he has a special place
in the President’s heart.
We can only assume they’d step in during his moment of need.
At the end of the day though, there are some things that even internet trolls and the President
of the United States of America can’t prepare you for.
The next ice age, world war three, or zombie apocalypse could be just around the corner
– and who would protect you then?
Some might be happy to slip away in such a dire situation, but not Musk – he has a
legacy to protect.
Even if everything goes wrong on Earth, he needs to know that it won’t be the end of
the road.
Everyone loves a good conspiracy theory about secret clubs of billionaires plotting how
they’d get away from Earth and found a new civilization if everything went to pot and,
let’s face it, Musk would probably be sat at the head of the table in this kind of meeting.
He’s literally the founder of a company that hopes to start human civilization on
Mars.
His company SpaceX is currently trying to develop the Starship, a huge reusable space
vehicle to take people to and from Mars, and hopes to launch the first rocket to Mars in
2022.
He’s already planning how to find water resources, identify hazards, power sources,
and everything else needed to sustain life on the planet.
This is all public information, so who knows what’s going on in private?
Maybe Musk secretly has a private rocket all set up with the essentials so that he can
jet off to Mars in at the push of a button should things come to that.
On the bright side, it seems he’s hoping to take other people with him too rather than
go at it alone – he’s hoping that one million people will be on Mars by 2050.
Choose me, Elon, choose me!
With the resources at Elon Musk’s disposal, it’s easy to infer that he must be one of
the most protected people in the world.
Even if his multi-billion dollar company, the president, and extensive private security
system all let him down, he can literally escape to Mars to keep himself safe.
How many other people have that in place as a backup plan?
Even though we don’t know much about the finer details of Musk’s personal protection,
it seems that his security is as weird and wacky as he is.
If you’re rethinking your own safety plans at this point, you might want some further
inspiration.
Why not check out our videos about how protected the President of the US or the British Royal
Family are?