- Welcome back to my channel,
the best place for our new signers, intermediate signers
and struggling signers.
In today's video I'm gonna talk about your role
as an ASL student in building connections and relationships
in the deaf community.
So if you've been wanting to make friends,
get involved, make connections inside the deaf community
but aren't quite sure how to do it then keep watching.
The deaf community is a beautiful place to be.
And whatever your reason for learning sign language,
your ultimate goal is to be connected
to the deaf community in some way or some aspects.
So let's go over some ways that you can do that.
I cannot stress enough that your intention
is the most important part of this equation, your intention.
You want to involve yourself in the deaf community
with thoughts of how can I connect?
How can I add value?
Not in the sense of, what's in it for me?
How can I get value?
Or how can I serve them or help them?
Let's break that down and explain exactly
what I mean by that.
So, number one, we don't expect them to teach us.
We don't expect them to serve us.
Of course we can learn from them,
and that's a great place to do it,
but we don't go in there going, teach me sign language,
teach me everything.
Give me, give me, serve me, serve me, right?
I go over this quite a bit.
In this video I won't repeat myself.
So if you wanna know more about that,
if you're feeling a little bit angry about it
when you hear me say that, definitely check out this video
so you understand exactly what I'm talking about.
I'm not saying you can't learn from them.
Every time I interact within the deaf community directly,
I learn, I improve, I grow
and that's the same for everybody.
So I'm not saying you can't learn from them
and they can't serve you.
But like I said at the beginning, it's your intention.
Are you going in there to take,
or are you going in there to add?
A lot of people kind of think about sign language is like,
oh, I want to help them.
I want to serve them.
Your intention is based out of thinking they're inferior.
You're probably not saying,
oh, I think they're less than me.
I don't think that's the kind of person you are.
You maybe subconsciously thinking they need you
to save them, help them, to serve them.
But remember they don't wanna be treated less than.
They don't wanna be treated as if you're superior to them.
And you can feel it.
You can feel that when that happens, right?
Like have you ever had those times
where somebody's befriending you,
but really you find out it's because
or maybe it's they think they wanna save you.
The easiest example I can think of is a religious sense,
when somebody is befriending you
but they really just wanna save your soul kind of a thing.
Not bashing religions at all
but it's the easiest way to make that a concrete theme,
is it doesn't feel good because then you go,
maybe they don't actually care about me.
Or maybe they think I'm a bad person,
or they're better than me,
or you feel like they're self-righteous or whatever,
you know that kind of feeling
that you get from that interaction.
Maybe they actually care about you as a person
but you are not gonna get that
because all you can feel is that yuck, that ick, right?
We don't want that.
Maybe you wanna be an interpreter.
Maybe you wanna be a deaf educator,
or a speech language pathologist,
or maybe you're learning sign language
for your own church, and you wanna be able to sign
with people in your congregation,
but ultimately you're not there to save them or serve them.
You're there to connect and build bridges
and have relationships together.
It's not this, I'm gonna help you.
Like I said, you wanna go into the deaf community
thinking, how can you add value?
Now add value doesn't mean serve.
Add had value could be you attending a deaf poetry night
and enjoying it and applauding,
or inviting other people to the deaf poetry night.
It could be you participating in the deaf poetry night.
It could be you sharing the event
and inviting other people to it,
or making a new friend and texting them
and going hanging out with them,
whatever it is.
It's just showing up and participating
in the community authentically.
That's really all it is.
It's just being a nice person.
So think of the golden rule in any kind of a situation.
I like the golden rule.
It's super easy to live by,
treat everybody else like I want to be treated.
I don't think any example
or any further explanation is needed,
but adding value is just contributing,
participating and being yourself.
Another thing I wanna speak to
and it particularly connects with the,
you don't wanna go in with the intention
of serving or saving or thinking you're better than.
Again I don't think that's who you are,
but you need to be aware of the history
of the members of the deaf community.
Every day they're treated less than.
They are disrespected.
They are thought of as less intelligent.
People take advantage of them.
Oh my gosh, the stories that the comment section could fill.
I can film hours of YouTube videos telling you
of all the stories I've heard of over the years
of how the members of the deaf community have been treated.
There are members in the deaf community
that really do not like hearing people
because of how their experience with hearing people be.
Their own parents, their own families have contributed.
No, I'm not saying everybody, but I'm saying many
of their own families and parents and siblings
and relatives and friends and coworkers and bosses
and government entities have treated them poorly.
Neglected them, ignored them,
refused to communicate with them.
So you have to go into the community being aware of that.
Some people may not like you because you're hearing
because of their experiences and don't take it personally.
It doesn't mean you're a bad person,
and maybe they'll never like you.
It doesn't matter, but just be aware of it.
And that's why I really want to urge you and caution you
that when you go into a deaf community,
you have to have the best intention.
So if you're going in there with the right intention.
You'll start to learn sign language on your own.
It doesn't mean you have to be perfect,
but you've put in the effort
and they can see that you've put in the effort
without expecting anything from them.
You've taken the time to learn about the culture,
to learn about the community.
So join Facebook groups that are run
by deaf and hard of hearing members.
Read books about the deaf culture and the deaf community.
There's a lot, well, maybe not like a lot,
but there's several on Amazon that you can find.
Reach out, connect with somebody
that you may know that deaf or hard of hearing.
Or if you meet somebody in the deaf community say,
hey, I wanna learn more
about the deaf culture and the deaf community.
Do you have some time to explain some things to me?
Maybe you have questions
or maybe you just wanna learn about it,
but just pose that question and open up that dialogue
and be willing to hear it.
Go out there into the community events.
I'm not saying all this stuff to make you nervous.
I'm bringing awareness to it.
And I want you to go in there to have fun.
Get out there, have fun.
Don't worry about making mistakes
cause we all make mistakes,
but go there to connect, have fun with it and enjoy it
and celebrate it because it's such a neat experience.
And it's such a neat community
and culture to be involved in.
It's nothing like you've ever experienced before.
And it's a fantastic, not necessarily
cause it's not a place, but it's a fantastic place,
fantastic group of people to be around and involved with,
and you'll grow so much.
Just make sure that your heart is there
and you're good to go.
You put in the effort, you show up,
and you learn and respect them.
You're solid, you don't need to worry about anything.
This is just to bring awareness
that it's your responsibility to show up
in the best way possible.
And always with the intention of you adding
rather than taking.
You'll get, you'll receive.
You'll get lots of goodness and wonderful experiences
but you just have to go in there going,
how can I add?
How can I give?
And you're good to go.
All of these videos that we've gone
over in the last few weeks,
how to understand people better?
How to interact and show up in the deaf community
is all leading up to our first conversation challenge
for the year 2021.
So I'm super excited if you remember.
Our conversational goal challenge
for the entire year is to have 500,000 signed conversations
by December 31st, 2021.
So this is our first opportunity to come together as a group
and have signed conversations in a five day challenge.
So come back next week, hit that notification bell
so you don't miss out on that challenge.
Super easy, super fun, super fast.
And it's gonna get us to those numbers quicker.
All right, I will see you in the next one.
If you missed any of those videos I talked about
check out these two here and I'll have links down
in the description for you as well, mwah.