Hey everybody, this is the first viewing of Tom and Jerry and Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory.
And sadly, the first 15 minutes of footage recorded of this got...uh...damaged when it was being imported.
I looked on the camera, I couldn't salvage it, but...uh...the rest of it is fine.
Uh, so I just want to tell you why that's missing.
And...uh...you might be wondering why my dad is in this viewing?
Uh, he just wanted to see it.
He likes Tom and Jerry
he likes Willy Wonka
he kind of knew he wasn't going to like this
but he just wanted to witness it.
So we welcomed him aboard to make some comments with us.
So that's what he's doing here, and...uh...it was an interesting one to sit there to say the least.
So go ahead and enjoy.
"What's going on out there!?"
That kid was just waiting for him to come to the door like "C'mon! C'mon! The chocolate!"
The kid moves like Sonic! Everything! I! Do! Is! Cool! Look at this! Woah!
Wah!
The fuck?! David Lynch can make a movie out of all these faces.
No, that's the element Wonkonium.
(laughter)
God.
Man, they even got that shot.
Yeah.
"This is going to cost Wonka a fortune in chocolate."
They're already stereotypes in the live-action version,
now, just throw animation on top of it, it just looks even more insulting!
Even the Americans kinda look like American stereotypes!
That's been the easiest movie to write.
Just like "Tom and Jerry do stuff. RIP RIP from original Script. Tom & Jerry do stuff. RIP RIP."
"I've never been happier."
- Now, that's good. - THAT'S funny
Fucking Droopy, man. I always knew that guy was an asshole.
Class, let's discuss how a dog can win a golden ticket and how they can work in a candy factory.
Let's discuss how I'm going to take it out on you by giving you all unnecessary Fs
Now there going to argue who gets to eat the coin.
What the hell is that!?
Wha- What was that?
The Fast and The Furriest.
"-has just been taking into custody by the police."
"Ay caramba."
(laughter)
Who knew Droopy was a criminal mastermind. I never thought I'd see the day where Droopy would be in cuffs.
(As Droopy)I guess I'm already the jail bitch.
Judge Claude Frollo!
Bring these vermin to the taffy waffy room.
Do you think the animators were just trolling?
You know, we're so bored with this idea, like let's at least have fun with us.
(Slugworth starts singing) "I want it all"
Umm...
What's going on?
I am a dark wizard!
Did you give the other kids this song? 'Cause it looked like just a whisper.
I never imagined Slugworth singing.
It's like if Pink Elephants (Dumbo) and Hellfire (Hunchback of Notre Dame) made this horrible combination.
"Oh yeah, I'm fine, Charlie. I'm fine."
"Look at me!"
That was a great segue. "I'm fine Charlie- LOOK AT ME!"
"LOOK! AT! ME!"
If you haven't seen Willy Wonka at all, does this work at all?
Of course not.
But, look at it this way. If you've seen Tom and Jerry, it still doesn't work. "Cause you just want to see Tom and Jerry.
Oh no, man. The chamber pot right on top.
That's a shitty thing to do.
"October First. That's tomorrow!"
I'm running over here.
Just like the real movie. It's like:
I've served my purpose raising this child I get no reward. The end.
"Bye."
She looked really interested in that bye.
Every face looks like the last face you see before that person eats you.
Welcome, my friends. Welcome. Today is going to be such an exciting day. It's a computer
Is he a computer!?
Yeah.
I. have. been. programmed. to. say. things. Welcome. Char. lie.
Oh My God! What!? Wha-
I've got pink eye and a lazy eye. I've got a lazy pink eye and a sty.
"What do you get when your glass eye is cracked? Looking like you're having a heart attack"
OH NO NO NO! STOP! STOP!
OOHH Oh oh. That's... not what I thought it was.
Wow...
"Charlie Bucket will get exactly what's coming to him? (evil laugh)"
I love it when I say plans that are really nice in an evil way.
We're going to give money to the children at the hospital. (evil laugh)
Fuck them all. They will be so happy! (more evil laughter)
I hope they see the oompa-loompa queen. She's someone that squeezes out all the oompa-loompas.
You people don't know about that.
We fell in the septic tank!
You're just the right size to fit in my oven.
Really, all Willy Wonka is, is a Hanzel and Gretel story where the witch wins.
And recruits a new witch.
The Willy Wonka story, which we know so well, they haven't changed anything.
It's really ironic too; him singing this song about pure imagination and changing the world,
when this is the most unoriginal fucking thing on the planet.
Yeah.
"What do you get- (Rob interrupts) with a lame old rehash?"
"Just one giant pile of ass"
The movie has the time to play up all of these characters faults, this still seems a little out of view; like
"Yeah I guess the kid was fat. Death!"
(laughter)
In the movie it's like every second he's eating.
There's so little time spent with these kids so far. And it's like "Wow, a bunch of assholes".
Oh my God. Are they going to do the Tunnel?
I have to see how Tom and Jerry Willy Wonka do the tunnel!
Display all of the racially inappropriate Tom and Jerry things in the past.
(laughter) All the Blackface!
Oh, come on. This is Rainbow Road on Mario kart.
Yeah.
"There's no earthy way of knowing..."
R-really?
"There's no knowing where we're rowing..."
This is strangely more nonsensical than it was in the first film.
Yeah.
"Not a speck of light is showing-"
What the fuck!?
(insane screaming)
(laughing in fear)
Wow.
Umm... That was not what I was expecting.
I- I'm not gonna lie I think I may have just found that creepier than the-
I might have too.
"It's sticky as all get out."
Kid, I'm not listening to a thing you're saying now.
You just scared the shit out of me.
You've... you've lost that right.
Okay, that banana is- Oh my God.
Oh wow.
Holy shit.
That's Little Mermaid poster bad.
Yeah. That- Oh damn.
EWWW It's touching his head! Oh my god!
If he licks the banana, I swear to God.
Instead of, like, make it look like there's a light on her, couldn't they make her really blue? It's a cartoon.
Like, really go for the fun colors.
They don't even have her big enough.
Yeah. They just stab her a thousand times.
Oompa-loom- *stab stab stab*
How fascinating. I'm like "How does this movie feel slower than the original?". it's not even an hour and a half
It's not even an hour and a half. It's like... Oh my God when is this gonna end?
You're just making the fan go faster in the fizzy lifting drink room.
You just launched the missiles towards China!
Wouldn't it be amazing... if he gives Charlie the factory,
but then it's revealed all the shit they've been doing this Slugworth. That's the fellow employee of mine
That's a fellow employee of mine!
You know what? You don't get shit Charlie.
Why are there spikes all up in there? What the fuck?
You know, if there's any chocolate factory that would have them.
Can we whip out the fucking paranoia song, again?
Paranoia, Paranoia, everybody's coming to get me
Oh, it's level 5 on Mario World.
"I want the world"
WE JUST DID THIS!
WHAT THE FUCK!?
"I want today"
Everyone: Ooooohhh
Now, we've established a connection.
This connects as much as... Tom and Jerry in a Willy Wonka movie!
I wonder if Han Solo is in there.
I was gonna say. "Get down, Chewy. I don't care what you smell."
Holy shit.
And they're gonna burn them.
OH MY GOD!!!
We're going Toy Story 3 up in here!
"Wonkavision! My latest-"
And, Thank God, last creation on the tour.
I'm gonna take a wild guess and say this is gonna make even less sense in the animated version.
"Can you send people through this thing?"
Wonkavision is people!
"Or could just not bare to look?"
(laughter) It chopped in half, apparently.
We actually had more to that routine.
I don't care how long you practiced, you're on the clock. Now get back to work.
"Now, you will pay the price for interfering with my master plan."
What is happening right now?
What do you get when you don't know when to stop?
Gotta pad this thing out so it's not quite a flop
Well, I'll give it this. I was not predicting this is how it end.
Boy, they sure took a sideways look at this thing.
(laughter)
That's one way of putting it.
"Under Section 37 of the contract, signed by him,-"
Which we DID NOT show.
You didn't even put the plot point in th-
(rage quit)
That's right. They fight. I forgot about that.
Oh, yeah.
"Yes, and I've press them. All except for one."
The one that says "annihilate"?
Go on, Charlie. Press it.
"Whoa"
"It's begun Charlie."
(laughter)
That would have been the greatest ending in the movie.
"It's begun", and then just end. Black screen.
So Charlie, how did you like my factory?
I'd fight to give it a star on Yelp.
Oh, they got the Tom and Jerry The End? Ugh!
In some ways it was not as bad as I thought it was,
but, that's also what made it worse. Because, it was not even so bad, it's like memorable rage-worthy bad.
It just bored the living shit out of me.
It had one or two good slapstick moments. I'll give it that.
It's a little funny how bad it is at times.
Like the awkward drawings.
It's like, I wanted even more funny bad.
Yeah, when it just gets to the repeat, that is really boring.
I absolutely love Willy Wonka and I love Tom and Jerry,
and to see them force these two things together,
and crunch them, and put them through the trash compactor and come up with even more shit. That's funny
That's about it. We'll see you next time. Bye.
Let's watch something good now.
NEVER!!!
you