(Swooosh Sound)
Do you ever find yourself earful being embarrassed or even humiliated in public?
This is a very common fear and today I want to talk about something that
happened to me
while shopping at Panera Bread and i wanna talk about how I handled it in the
deconstruct what I
did systematically so you could potentially use among these tactics
when you find yourself in a situation similar to this.
So I was home for Thanksgiving in the midwest and it was my responsibility to
pick up the bread
for the meal so as I was going to go get some Challah bread
loaves from Panera Bread. And as I walk in,
it's very busy and I see it as a big long line to the area where people buy
meals
and then it appeared that there were also some registers right by the bakery
but there's no one in live there, so I decided I'm going to stand by the bakery and see if
I could get some help get some attention
and order my bread and if not find out that indeed a line that ever was in was the
line for both the bakery and the regular food
So I begin to stand there and I see one guy
kind of to the left in between the two sections making some drinks
and I continue to stand there and now I've been there long enough to
disappoint either I'm in the wrong place to this guy's trying not to help me so
I walk over to him and I say hey man are you
and before I could even get through he says pay a bigger these drinks
switch wait a minute and before he finishes
I cut him off again is a journalism at all I want to know is do you work in a
bakery
he says yes I say okay cool thanks so
I handled it right there and we'll talk about what I did hear the end of this
but after that older lady comes up
and she approaches this guy and says hey I'm
is this so where you he says take can't you see and making these drinks right
now
I hope your little bit so when overs when I say
solution I went to the same thing to him and I was scolded just same
and then I raise my voice to the level the majority of people
Inc America hear me and I said hey man you really like helping people out
you're making drinks do your
so everyone stops is required everyone turns to him
spotlight on him he gets very nervous he cast ambers a little better news is no I
say
was a minute okay it's alright alright it's just watch it on a little bit
okay so that was that the entirety of the scenario
so it's deconstructed so this guy is use to you
being able to be short with people when they come up to me he's doing other
things I'm sure you'd like that and other scenarios because he knows
bet the minute he addresses that a short way with you
you're gonna feel the social pressure and most people are just gonna be back
often to go
guys a little rude but he's gonna feel kinda good cuz he handled in a way that
gave him some mom so before I guess message way should
but I've in situations like this many times before so I know that
I don't know maybe ten percent of the time someone will be rude when you ask
him
a simple question if they can't so before he was
even able to finish talking and seeing him a case in making his wrist
i interrupted him into no no no that's not what I'm asking do you work
in the bakery okay so now you're throwing him off his game
he has to answer your questions your ass universe wrong way and it's a question
that make sense
so after that %uh the situation handled and I were full fine about it would have
been done
but then when this nice old lady comes up for all the lady
as is the same thing to him and he's even more rude to her that's just not
cool
that's something I don't feel good about you like that kinda stuff should occur
so I feel motivated to handle it so how many handle it well
I'm in it show empathy to her
and say hey listen you know I do think how laughing about it show I'm not
worked up
power going over to insert pay you know I said that him to a news release
roots me too well this is kinda like a pity party and no one feels good just
your you get together and do you feel about going out there and you tell
people you can manually Carusone was so
I want to address that a person I try to do this is to it
I was school did just the same way using your school code lightened up
even a little bit more so she collapses on issues over cost
yeah then did just the kinda show this guy that this is not cool to treat
people like that I decided to put the social pressure times
10 back on him because in environments where there's waiters or waitresses are
bartenders
their use to exerting social pressure and they're used to standing up to a
little social pressure
his baby know when the draw all that attention in
and put on someone else they're really not feeling that social pressure there
directing it
towards someone else so I thought it was time to turn me around and wrecked him
so I raise my voice not yelling just really a lot air
and I said him and you don't really like helping people out when you're making
drinks do your
home all the pressures on him he's not used to it he doesn't want that
so he's abusing bears he stammered Eastern race like bottom
before he can do that I exert authority
I defuse the situation by saying
know this man it's okay it's okay so anytime you tell someone is OK
you're coming from a position of authority right especially with their
deposition
that hearing that from you is gonna call earners because this guy still rattled
right now
anytime anyone says anything to him he's good he's gonna reach on to jump onto it
to break out of that social pressure that he's experiencing
socialism and it's okay it's okay just you really gotta watch your tone
so you tell him what he should do you letting you know
that's not cool to treat people like that and you're letting you know
with the social pressure I'll everyone in the restaurant looking at him
so he backs off this lady feels much better
this guy was put in his place we both feel like we were disrespected
I think this guy was called his attention um maybe he was being more
true than he thought I may be starting to get away with that
but I feel like that was a really good example of something that happens or
something similar
can happen all the time in public I think that was a a pretty good way of
handling it I felt good at the end of it and I know that she felt good
a he probably felt a little bit reprimanded I'm sure he's probably all
shaken up for the next few minutes
but I'd rather him happy shaken up in reassess
everything that he did as opposed to 1050 more people coming in throughout
the rest of the day
and leaving the store feeling poorly is this portly man decided that he wanted
to exert his little bit influence
and I'm put other people down so think about that think about how you might be
able to use that the situation is not exactly
like that but anytime you're confronted which social pressure
by someone who is either working establishment or to someone else in the
establishment
the couple you can maybe turn that around it do not hold the social
pressure
but also put the social pressure back on the even stronger
to exert your influence in exert your story
until next time