Ah, how 'ya going top blokes and sheilas. Here's me face.
Today I'm gonna do a review of the most polite people ever.
the reason I'm doing this is because
Anger gets a lot of attention on the internet
When someone chucks a fucking wobbly and loses their temper
It can spread like wildfire
whereas sometimes the polite...the polite moments can fly under the radar
over the years There's been quite a few videos of people being polite,
That I've thoroughly enjoyed and I found them funny
So let's let's go over some of them Hey,
okay, so basically there is a...
Totally fully naked guy outside
he just like knocked on our window and like he keeps asking me to come out.
Okay, so the stage is set that's a nice introduction.
There's a naked bloke outside this guy's house.
He's just trying to hang out with his Sheila mate
and the naked bloke is like "why won't you come out?"
"Why don't you come touch my penis?"
"why don't you come have some penis fun times?"
Let's see where this goes
What's up
Not much, Im sorry man
Nah, no worries
I love the tone of politeness from the beginning there
from the very first moment that he opens the door
And he's just "hi, what's going on"
Nice soft tone, you know?
many of us would have opened the door and going what the fuck you doing mate?
get your hand off your dick
Go put some pants on.
Why are you outside my windows striking your penis?
seriously fuck off
can I help you?
How can I help you?
to a naked guy Who's kind of got a half stiffy?
That could backfire on you.
That's actually ballsy that's actually a ballsy thing to be asking
How can I help you?
I wanna stand there
You can't stand here because it's a private property
Nah it was a bait-and-switch. It was a bait-and-switch
How can I help you? how can I help you?
the guy starts to answer "well I just wanna stand here"
And maybe you could just
Touch me a little bit
and nah he cuts it up straight away
fuckin bait-and-switch
good and still very polite
This is getting a bit weird
Yeah?
Yeah,
That's a beautiful buildup.
You could have opened the door and go "what the fuck this is weird get out of here"
But he's built up to it.
You know? you don't know what state of mind someone else is in
In this day and age
So he's built up to it.
He's now going " this is a bit weird if I'm honest I didn't think it was weird at first I wasn't judging you"
Now I've decided it's a bit weird
So
maybe
maybe pants
maybe consider pants
I'm gonna close the door and ...
Don't want to be...
I don't wanna be rude to you because I understand you're having a good time
But also like please don't don't disturb our good time, that's all
just masterful, just like expert level 5000
I understand you're having a good time, but we're having a good time as well
boundaries
We don't need our good times to intersect mate. Okay?
Yeah, this is what you like to do
Whereas, I like to hang out with me mate and watch stranger things
So we're gonna go back inside and do that and our good times never need to converge
They don't need to know about each other
Just brilliant
expert level 5000 politeness well done mate moving on to the next video
You know who I am?
you know where you are?
Nah dude, you're in the completely wrong house. You've never seen me before in your life.
I've never seen you before
I really just wanna go to sleep
You're in my bed right now
Okie dokie so there's the premise of the video
this little drunkard has walked into the wrong house
And crashed out on a mattress that doesn't belong to him
You know my brother
What's your brother's name?
I've never heard that name before in my entire life
No one knows his brother
Well it's not because you're literally in my bed right now
What are you fucking talking about?
No
What are you talking about?
What we have here is the person the polite person in the video knowing that that he's right.
This is not your house mate
It's a nah fuck you, nah fuck you, nah fuck you deadlock.
But not a physical one
Usually I'm commentating on like nah fuck you nah fuck you nah fuck you nah fuck you fuck you
this one is like
Polite mode
I love it
You're gonna be so rattled when you wake up in the morning and realize what an asshole you are
a bit of name-calling a bit of name-calling
but still very polite
that was some polite name-calling
It's not gonna... You know you feel safe
It's not gonna go to a physical level of aggression
both these guys are pretty laid back
And you know the person living there, He knows his little feller is drunk as fuck
He's been out for a night on the town trying to get his end wet
I own this bed, I really own it
I paid taxes for this bed
He thinks he pays taxes for the bed
sure you do sure you do mate
You just gotta laugh at that don't you?
You can't shoot someone in the face when they're saying they pay taxes for your mattress and your pillow
you got to go
Are you really serious?
You're in the wrong house
Get up get up
Oh that's great yeah
Now we're getting to the stage where the polite person is like enough is enough.
I gotta get a bit firmer with the boundaries here
You wanna bet?
That you're in the wrong house. Yes, I do
Drunken is still, he's still stubborn. He's digging in the heels in "I'll bet ya"
"I'll bet you mate hundred bucks"
You think I'm wrong? I'm in a perfect mental state right now
You're the one who's fuckin wrong
have you been in this house before?
oh
It's dawning on him
look at the face, look at his little face, It is dawning on him.
Yeah i used to live in this house
Do you live in this house now though?
This is so weird
You just walked into the wrong house
You really walked into the wrong house
This is gonna be a great story for both of us for many years to come
Do you want to crash here though?
like there's a bed right here
alright, have a nice night
Nice meeting you
Nice meeting you too
And there's a polite conclusion. What a wonderful video
I think everyone here is gonna end up being good friends
Bloody fantastic
alright
onto the next one
this one is a bit of a sad video
It is hard to watch it is hard to dissect and breakdown
basically it's a robbery video, okay?
We've got the feller at the counter there purchasing a product
And we got the shop owner who doesn't konw what's about to happen
If you do me a favor
Could you empty that till for me please put it right here
What do you mean?
Empty the till
I'm robbing you sir
Are you sure?
yes I'm sure
there's politeness from the robber
There's politeness from the shop owner as
fucking politeness flying all over the place
so it makes me feel
Emotionally dyslexic at this point in time.
I'll break it down and articulate it a bit more afterwards
just bear with me it's a short video, let's fucking continue
Why do you want to do that?
because I need the money I got kids that need to be fed sir
I really am sorry to have to do this
How about i give 40$ and this is it
I like that even in this video we still see the the five steps to politeness or whatever we want to fucking call it
the shop owner entering the negotiation phase
Are you sure want all the money?
Maybe just 40$?
I can't do that sir, I've got rent to pay, I've got bills
And the kids need to eat
Thank you very much, I appreciate it.
And I really am sorry, and if I ever get back on my feet again sir
I'll bring it back
I'm sorry
Yes, so it's not haha laugh out loud funny
I'll admit
the bloke with the gun the robber could in fact be in a desperate circumstance
And this is his last option, he feels hopeless, this is all he can do
Or
this could be his routine
He's like I'm not gonna run in there
Shoot out the fucking security camera
point the gun right in the guy's face, and yell fuck you give me the fucking money
I'm gonna go the polite routine and it confuses the shit out of the shop owner
He can only just be polite as well,
so it's a real bizarre one and look it's sad
Definitely if this guy's in such a desperate circumstance,
but if he's using politeness as an emotional blackmailing tool
well that's just bullshit ladies and gents
and it's very hard to look out for and to pinpoint it
But be careful of it in life
anyway on to the next video.
I haven't watched this video for a few years
There's a cop who's been called to a car park
to deal with some loitering reprobate teenagers
I'm sure there's gonna be shots fired arms broken
There's gonna be chaos that'll go worldwide
No, that's not the premise of this video
The chief will get on me again
And I'll get on my guys and I have to do stuff like I don't want to do for example
Right everybody for everything
cuz we have to deal with it.
I don't want to be that guy
so immediately he's into the polite negotiation
he's like "can you think of my point of view?"
"I've got to come out here and people expect me to deal with you"
"And yell at you and and go fucking apeshit."
"Why would I want to do that and you don't want me to do that?"
So we need to keep it safe, cool
We need to keep it safe we need to keep it cool.
Who wants to be cool? Hey
I'm cool with that
Another amazing thing there's none of this stop filming
"stop turn..."
"I know the law"
and the person behind the camera going "I know the law"
"nah I know the law"
and the cop going "I know the law"
"no I know I am the law".
"I know the law"
"I know the law".
"I'm allowed to film"
I know the law, I know the law
Nah fuck you, nah fuck you, nah fuck etc
I like how there's none of that, just give the camera a smile
how are you going?
They're supposed to put up signs and they told us they want us to enforce it
I'd rather come here and treat you like adults say guys please don't worry get your stuff and move on
it's drawing too much attention
I'd rather treat you like adults.
That's great
That is not emotional blackmail politness
That's sincere
they're young they're moving into a stage of life where they'll become young adults
So why not start treating them like that?
that's very good very good.
This is heartwarming.
Please guys
I want to be on the same team
could we be on the same team that's all i'm asking
I'm addressing you like adults cuz you are
Now if you show me a little respect back i'd really appreciate it
That's actually a big keyword
Respect
respect and politeness
Probably inseparable when you when you think about it
That's
That's a fucking... Yep no I've got a new thought. I've got a new thought
We're covering a lot of layers of politeness here.
What does it mean to be polite?
sincere
respectful
It's got to be more, that's just I just that's all I can think of for now
Same page?
All right, thank you
What was your name
Sergeant Eriksson.
I'm Jose. Thank you
kapow expert level 5000 unlocked friendship acquired
That is Zen master level of politeness right there
to get a handshake from yung Jose at the end
fuckin sensational
unfortunately this cop was in the news a week later
and suspended for
Shooting a kid in the fucking face
Nah, i'm just joking
It's all good it's a happy story
What do you dickheads reckon? do you reckon some of those people were too polite?
Could they have gotten angry or violent?
Would that have been a better outcome?
it may have been more entertaining
But would it have been a better outcome for the human race?
let me know what you think in the comments
Also I've started doing these personalized video shout outs on this app called Cameo
Put that in your browser and you can book me
To do like a video shout out to say happy birthday,
or have a good wedding
or good luck with your penis surgery
Whatever it is
I'll put a link to the fucking website below
And you can book me for the cost of a stake sandwich and a mid strength beer
I'm not gonna fuckin undersell myself,
but if you're interested in that have a cheeky look
and yeah cheers everyone, see ya